19 Jul Giovanni’s Superfan Sidebar 07/19/2017 – Rob Cesternino and Jeff Cesario
A real time blog where Superfan Giovanni does recap and commentary on the show as it happens and opines on all things ACS
Guest – Rob Cesternino and Jeff Cesario
Recorded 07-18-2017 – Release Date 07-19-2017
Production Number #2120
Adam opens the show to a “Hedge Trimmers and a Chainsaw man-scaping” intro, Adam welcomes Gina to the show and BB has a drop of Adam shouting “I agree with you cause I’m smart!” and Adam says he’s vexed by the decreasing intelligence of society in the face of free access to all information via the internet.
Adam welcomes Jeff back to the show for his 4th appearance, Adam explains that everyone is a big fan of his appearances on the show and shares his love for the character Chet Waterhouse.
Adam says he heard Jeff on KROQ back in 1993 on KROQ, the Kevin and Bean morning show, even predating ‘Jimmy the Sports Guy’ and transitions to an anecdote from the other night at home with the kids.
Adam explains he was watching ‘Jaws’ with the kids and Sonny echoed a remark Adam made to Lynette 15 years ago or possibly more, Sonny burped in Natalia’s face and she proclaimed it smelled like root beer and he replied “Good, that means it tastes like root beer” which was very close to Adam’s “Good, that means I’m asleep retort he delivered to Lynette when she woke him up for snoring.
BB and the gang weigh in and they try to discover where that sense of humor and similarity came from, Jeff thinks Sonny has an affinity for Adam’s personality and Adam mocks Sonny’s estimate that he’s ranked somewhere around 4th or 5th in the competition to be “Class Clown” and Jeff has a nice Ali Wong reference.
Adam says he has a proclamation that he wishes the mayor would make, he explains how he is tweeted about various traffic interventions by fans across the country.
Adam has Gary read an article about red turn arrows being replaced by flashing yellow arrows, Adam asks how long he’s been ranting about these arrows on air, BB has a funny and earnest estimation of the ubiquity of these rants from Adam.
Adam is now sharing some details from the article and Gina is reading after Gary was able to locate it and provide it to her, BB has a killer “one particular local motorist who is particularly vocal” one liner.
Gina reads from the article and shares the details, Adam is now asking Gary about the rest of the article, Gina skipped the part they already discussed and the quote from the councilman, Adam has her read the missing paragraph and Gary jumps on mic to finish the article.
Adam is mystified about Gina not having the full article, Gary thinks she has a full printed copy and Adam has her finish the article and the “you make a judgement as a driver” line, he hones it on that and makes a larger point about personal responsibility while operating a vehicle. He says instead of retrofitting Los Angeles and spending all of that money, how about the mayor gets on the blower and tells citizens to use their judgment, “right on red turn arrows” as a public service mandate/announcement.
BB says he could never imagine a politician doing this as it makes sense and is quite simple, Adam has a “friendly toot, toot” addendum for alerting other motorists about turning right on red lights.
Adam has the indignation motorist yesterday, he was at a four way stop sign and was stared down by the other motorist for driving 8 feet before seeing it was the other driver’s right of way.
Gina shares how she gave a sorry waive to a motorist she creeped up on who immediately gave her the finger, assuming Gina was giving her shit instead of politely saying sorry.
BB is now commenting on metering lights for entering the freeway, he explains how they have two cars per green now and most drivers don’t know that, Gary says he got into an accident because someone didn’t drive through as they were supposed to do.
BB shares a recent interaction when he was aggressively honked at by a guy who was stopped on a green, how does someone point at the sign and inform that driver without it being an act of futility.
Dawson has a “The House of Adam” in Arabic tidbit.
Jeff has a traffic cop “let’s go” idea for moving traffic.
Geico – Die of carbon monoxide poisoning in traffic Edition
Adam is setting up a rant on Gavin Newsom and informs Chet of the time he guested on the show, Adam says he’s only been as disappointed as he was with Gavin and Mayor Garcetti’s lack of thoughts about traffic as he was when he asked his dad why he doesn’t have a middle name.
Adam is now setting up a clip from ACS #1025 and they’re commenting on his reactions from that episode, BB and Gina both seem equally as outraged.
Adam says these guys don’t seem that interested in their jobs, Gina is surprised by Gavin’s immediate deflection in response to Adam talking about turning right on red lights.
Gian teases an insane encounter with a homeless person.
Alone – Truly alone and no forced challenges Edition
Gina shares how she texted Gary about possibly being late for the show, she was trying to help a homeless man whom she witnessed counting change.
BB has some “Resveratrol” drop work from Dr. Bruce.
Gina explains how the homeless guy went and stared at the wall as she paid for his items and then how he screamed in her face about 18 inches away when she tried to give them to him, Adam has a killer “so he was touching your titties” one liner and Gina rolls with it.
Gina says, “No good deed goes unpunished” and Adam hopes she learned an important lesson, she says she came straight to the studio after the encounter and went right into the show, wow!
BB has a killer “we have a new intern” joke and Jeff has a solid Shia LaBeouf comment.
Adam jokes about this homeless guy being laid off from his factory job last week, leading to his current state, mocking the notion that anyone could become homeless.
Gina estimates he was in his early 60’s and Adam heads to the phones as he tells Gary he can clear the screen when they finish with it.
Q and Ace
1st Caller Rebecca, she’s from Las Vegas but missed the most recent live show, BB mocks her for not attending “all” of the shows, she missed one.
Rebecca brings up how all of Adam’s guests on the show poopoo the notion of nuclear power, she explains how Thorium-based nuclear power is safe and they demand to know how she knows so much.
Adam references a sailor who tweeted him about submarine he was on that has only been refueled once in 30 years, due to its nuclear power supply.
It turns out her family has acreage of property, a homestead with massive amounts of Thorium, BB jokes about her having some skin in the game.
Adam is marveling at her property and its massive expanse, Adam mocks the idea of allowing the public and their superstitions to sway interest and impeded research into nuclear power.
Gary has some more details about the prohibiting factors with Thorium power after Jeff almost immediately poopoos the idea like all other guests.
2nd Caller Alex, he wants to know what race Adam thinks is the coolest, he says the Mayans and he explains the reasoning why, the sexy sacrifices and not knowing the difference between them and the Incans and how they can shift blame on that culture at will, causing all of us to apologize for our ignorance.
Pitbull is brought up and Adam says he loves performers that are essentially cheerleaders, he now imitates Pitbull and shouts “Come on, c’mon” and then segues to DJ’s who jump out from their gear hype up the audience.
Adam is talking about everything being “and Pitbull” in pop music, implying he doesn’t have his own work, he just jumps in and assists with hype and enthusiasm.
Adam is now riffing about adding “Pitbull” to other scenarios and goes deep on a roof repair estimate improv scene with Gina playing the homeowner, BB jumps in as Pitbull encouraging her to take the estimate.
BB has a killer “Ohhh Ci” comment and Adam shares how already knows that Pitbull would be great at motivational speaking, Pitbull doesn’t even know what Pitbull does according to Adam.
3rd Caller Pete, he’s retired and he wants to help out despite losing some of his eyesight, Adam has a killer “not performing circumcisions anymore” one liner.
Gina asks Pete about the shots he gets in his eyes, he explains how expensive it is and how often he needs to get them.
Adam is now recommending some possible ways he can still contribute, Pete shares how much he loves Gina’s name and how he mistook her for being Italian, before he learned she was Jewish.
Adam says he’s Italian and he thinks the Italian people get a lot of mileage out of the exotic cars and the pasta, Gina shares how her parents planned to name her Eugene if she was boy.
Jeff has a “Miserati” one liner and them on as BB tells him to save it for Chet.
4th Caller Marcos, he is high on codeine as he recovers from shingles and Adam is now riffing about having shingles only 3 times before they need to be stripped, like roof shingles. Gold!
Marcos wants to know how Adam feels about Obamacare and the failed GOP replacement, Adam talks about free stuff and how once you give it away you have a hard time getting it back.
Adam is talking about the Santa Monica initiative to limit ATM fees to $2 and how despite it being voted in, is still not in effect and he riffs about limiting fines for driving and parking infractions too, upping the ante for the non-complying city government.
Adam is talking about his money and says he could have spent his Improv class money on insurance and maybe he should have, Adam is now moving on to how people don’t have the right to anything in the world, it’s not reality.
They have to let Marcos go as he’s too charming with his laugh and stoned persona.
Adam is now welcoming Chet Waterhouse to the show for his new segment.
Sports with Chet Waterhouse
Hilarious hoverboard, Roger Federer and “porn on the cob” jokes. The music bed really sells it, this his hilarious.
Adam loves the bit and gives out some plugs for Jeff Cesario and his live dates.
They head to break.
They’re back from break with a hilarious “Definitely Not a Jew” from Knoxville Tennessee, with a woman trying to Barbecue a brisket in her bathtub.
Adam has a killer Lisa ‘Left Eye’ Lopes and he explains her perfect and clear reasoning for burning down the mansion she shared with Andre Rison.
Rob Cesternino is making his ACS debut, Adam remembers him from ‘Survivor: The Amazon’ season, Adam recalls Jeff Probst saying Rob was the greatest player to never win the game.
Rob explains how he got into podcasting and they move back to Jeff as Adam brings up how well he wears a choker, Rob suggests he create his own line of chokers and sell them.
Rob gives them a refresher on his season and Adam steps in with a hilarious “outed as bi-curious” one liner and he takes it back to the very good-looking women on the show ‘Survivor’ and then says Rob resembles Jon Bines.
Adam is talking about how you know you’re good if you can leave with your job and do things remotely, like Jon Bines living in NYC while still writing for ‘Jimmy Kimmel Live’ and Bean recording remotely for the morning show.
Rob brings up ‘Game of Thrones’ and how surprised he was that both Adam and BB have never seen it, he shares some facts about the show and accurately presents the numbers for how many viewers were reported for the seventh season premier that just recently aired.
BB and Gina weigh in and they further discuss the fantasy genre before moving on to a live read and the game.
Smart Mouth – Wet Garbage and Lambo Edition
Rotten or Fresh – The Rotten Tomatoes Game
‘Game of Thrones Edition’
They react to a picture of Jon Bines during the opening theme and further talk about it after the music wraps.
Adam jokes about calling Jon Bines “Jon Stossel-Bines” as he also resembles John Stossel, Adam ponders if other cultures share such hilarious office wordplay and nicknames before they get into the game.
1st Movie ‘Pompeii’ (2014) and Adam talks about the overuse of CGI in movies and how this seemed like one of those pictures.
They all jump in with their guesses, everyone going very low.
2nd Movie ‘X-Men: Days of Future Past’ (2014)
Adam says he doesn’t recall it but thinks they’re all kind of ok, Adam is sharing 3 possible numbers and BB mocks him for not going with the other 97 possible options.
BB is closest to the impressive 91% for this movie.
Adam riffs about being a pimp and being able to get away with very basic witticisms that get you way too much mileage, he references Bishop Don Magic Juan.
3rd Movie ‘Sing Street’ (2016)
BB is the only one who has seen it and takes the points because of his knowledge.
4th Movie ‘300’ (2006)
Dawson says they saw this while in Las Vegas for a live ACS in 2006, Adam says he’s never seen the full movie and BB shares why it’s great along with Dawson in unison.
BB mentions “Battle of Thermopylae” and Adam jokes about Thermopylae being between California and Vegas, out where the ‘Bun Boy’ is located.
Adam shares his distaste for the manly growling that most of the cast including the lead use for the film, BB joins him as they mock the premise of using that growly voice for mundane things and information.
Adam recalls that Gerard Butler came and sat in on the KLSX ACS for research for his role in ‘The Ugly Truth’ (2009) as Adam jogs his own memory with an assist from BB, he recalls Gerard had heard the February 4th 2008 episode where he was riffing about all of the drunken activities he took part in while missing the Super Bowl.
Adam now is asking for Gary to send me an email so we can locate the clip, done and done!
Adam says the movie was horrible, as it was a Katherine Heigl movie that wasn’t ‘Knocked Up’ and he jokes it has a 14% on Rotten Tomatoes, a moment later Gary reveals it’s at 13% and BB jokes that Adam should get the points for that one.
They are back to ‘300’ and Adam tries to gauge the average score from the reviews, BB is kicking ass and Adam says he’s going for a record with this game.
5th Movie ‘Me Before You’ (2016)
Only Gina has seen this one, Adam jokes that he’s out of the game unless BB goes with an out there 3000% guess.
Dawson is now tallying up the scores and congratulates Rob on not coming in last place.
Patreon.com/AdamCarolla – 10% off the income will go to charity Edition
Adam stops the news to share his recent observation that there is more attention paid to human traffic in Los Angeles than there is paid to regular traffic that everyone experiences and suffers in every single day.
Adam has some killer human trafficking riffs while making some great points, don’t let anyone from The Wayne Foundation hear this bit.
Adam is now mocking the “Know Human Trafficking” campaign and the use of “Know” in place of “No” and he makes another point about many people who speak English as a 2nd language will be reading this and not understand it.
Adam brings up an observation from the movie ‘Serendipity’ and the use of a 555-55 phone number, Adam says it’s also one of the few movies where the guy is considering leaving his hotter fiancé for a less hot mystery woman.
Adam is aware of the enormity of his statement and is not taking it lightly, he explains that he knows Kate Beckinsale is hot, BB is trying to sway him but he maintains that the fiancé played by Bridget Moynahan has a more attractive look than Kate does in that particular movie.
1st Story is on the death of the inventor of the self-cleaning house, Adam says it cannot exist and has never heard of it.
Adam mocks the self-cleaning oven, which really just burns everything away, there are no robot arms that scrub away gunk.
2nd Story is on the guy who plays Kermit losing his job and the statement from the company about his performance.
Adam is back to ‘Serendipity’ and BB is giving it to Adam that he’s correct about this one.
BB describes the plot and they move on.
3rd Story is on Quentin Tarantino and his upcoming penultimate film about the Manson murders and Adam shares his love for QT’s work and how multiple re-watching only reveals more interesting minutia and paint a richer experience for the viewer.
Gina asks if BB recalls the ‘Pulp Fiction’ soundtrack being popular in the mid 1990’s and Adam recalls seeing the movie in advance from its release and the way he and Jimmy agreed that the movie was perfect except for Quentin Tarantino, unaware of him nor his persona, the purest reaction possible.
LifeLock – Standard live read Edition
4th Story is on a recent ‘Star Trek’ vs. ‘Star Wars’ debate that ended in violence, Adam is weighing in and they all try to figure out which franchise the attacker was a fan of and supporting with his brutality.
Gina wraps the news.
‘I’m Sorry’ – Adam loves Tom Everett Scott Edition
Adam gives out the closing plugs and wraps up the show, great episode!