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Giovanni’s Superfan Sidebar 08/30/2016 – Slim Jim Phantom

Giovanni’s Superfan Sidebar 08/30/2016 – Slim Jim Phantom

A real time blog where Superfan Giovanni does recap and commentary on the show as it happens and opines on all things ACS

Guest Slim Jim Phantom

Recorded 08-29-2016 – Release Date 08-30-2016

Production Number #1891

Show Page

Adam opens the show to a funny “health records” intro and a timely “Good Day Sir” #TopDrop and BB explains to Adam that Gene Wilder just passed away prior to the recording of this episode.

BB and Gina are both now quoting ‘Young Frankenstein’ and Adam pledges to pull out one of his head pubes for his fallen fellow hair like pubes homie, Adam’s equivalent of pouring one out for him.

They are now going over the filmography of Gene and they all praise ‘Silver Streak’ where he was just in it the perfect amount and Gina shares her love for ‘Haunted Honeymoon’ and Adam goes through the Gene Wilder comedies of the era.

 

Adam thanks Gina for the carb free casserole and they find out Gilda Radner died in 1989, she didn’t make the 15th anniversary of SNL.

Adam is now giving his thoughts on “Arm & Hammer” baking soda, he says a small carton would outlive his family if it was only used for baking, but it gets used up for other purposes.

Adam says a teaspoon would be uses once per year, so they found out really quick that they could repurpose this stuff, started shaming people with advertisements about smelly fridges and then even suggesting customers put the baking soda down the drain every two months or so.

 

Adam riffs about them pitching cleaning roads with baking soda next, Gina has a carton in her fridge and Adam says these are thoughts he has at 06:23 A.M. when his dog is licking the side out of his head.

Adam didn’t purposely bring up baking soda before bed or deal with it in anyway, just a random thought.

Adam talks about his kids getting into comedy and he shares how he was riffing the bit of the middle eastern guy saying if something is good or not, Sonny wanted Adam to repeat the bit while they were eating and Adam is now telling them the story of how the bit evolved.

 

Adam tells them about the driver who showed up late and then hid behind his accent, they gave up on his “yeah we go now” replies.

Adam is now bringing up the other story where the driver pulled off the road to take a shit for 20 minutes in the worst part of town, “you like it’s good, yes we go” and Adam shares the “what are you doing fucking my wife’s sister” closer he couldn’t bust out for his son.

Adam says he knew the guy was full of shit in Toronto as the accent vanished when he went to collect his toll, his English got really good really quick when August refused to pay.

 

Adam brings up Terry Thomas from ‘It’s a Mad, Mad, Mad, Mad World’ and they go into the next segment

 

Mangria Moments

#MangriaMoments winner Brian who took a photo of him and his “honey bunny” in a hot spring in Denver that required an 18-mile roundtrip hike to reach it.

Adam says the nine-mile hike back after two bottles of Mangria might be difficult.

Brian is bragging about his iced Mangria and Adam says the picture is amazing, Adam jokes about them arriving there to see one fat guy sitting by himself waiting for them.

 

Brian says they ran into some naked hot spring sitters and had them take the photo of them, Adam is now comparing the scenery of what they’re looking at from Brian’s pic vs. where Adam was seeing his kid play basketball over the weekend.

Adam is asking Brian about his girlfriend Robin who he calls a keeper as she was game to attempt this hike, Brian is saying she’s impressive and has the Sherpa pack rocking when he’s lagging, citing some earlier hikes over the summer.

Adam says a 9-mile hike is a serious trek, he asks if the hike was worse going up or coming back down, he talks about fatigue setting in and he needed to carry an emergency shooter sized Mangria in his boot.

 

Adam is asking him about how long it took for them to cover the distance, he says they did it in about 5 hours on the way in, he says the stream is dangerous and treacherous with slippery rocks.

Gina has a funny “she put her jacket down so he could cross” one liner that’s probably accurate based on Brian’s description.

Adam is talking about the Coors factory, seeing Red Rocks Amphitheatre and the rest of this great country while on the road and driving between shows.

 

Q and Ace

1st Caller Ben from Tel Aviv, he recalls that Adam is a big fan of talcum powder and shares his own recent experiences with it, Adam jokes about baking soda making the pitch to take over for ball powder.

Adam talks about the douching he did around the shop, he says he found a talcum powder container missing the top in the bathroom, Adam says it takes a bit of effort to get the top off.

Adam mocks Nick’s “very retarded answer” and BB steps in, Gary gets on mic to reveal it was Caelan and not Nick who is taking his tard shrapnel, Adam quotes Caelan.

 

Adam is now going over the talcum powder again, he is now saying he uses extra water to cover up urine on his pants, like at a fancy party, one would then use the extra water to imply a sink mishap.

Adam thinks that Tom Sizemore did that with powder and used the talcum in the same manner of his analogous scenario, he’s talking about ACS #1411 from 2014.

BB has a killer “talcum powder?” comment.

 

Adam says his daughter decided to make silly putty out of another talc container at his house, Ben has a “blown by Casper” joke and Adam says his nephew is named Casper so it’s throwing him off.

Adam is now talking about Jews and their lack of embrace of brevity and it being the soul of wit, he talks about interfaith wedding ceremonies and how long the Jewish rabbi will really chew up the scenery and delay the main course that Adam is dying to get to.

Ben is now telling them about moving to Israel and enlisting in the army, Adam talks about how it must improve culture to have mandatory military service requirements.

 

Adam talks about how some colleges had free shows vs. paid tickets, he notices that the paid tickets resulted in better shows, the free audiences weren’t willing to hand and would file out and not appreciate what was given to them using their tuition dollars.

 

Castrol

Lotta turbo charging going on these days’ edition

Gina has a challenge question from Tim Cornish, asking about the best tire size for his vehicle and the max PSI.

Keep in mind your tires will expand throughout the day as they warm up.

 

2nd Caller Scott, he says people would presume he’s against the topic Scott is calling about and Adam says technology hates him, he shares his difficulties in using talk to text or speech to type technology, he doesn’t like the limited timeframe for messages, they don’t give him a hummingbird’s heartbeat.

Adam says he attempted to use Siri to reply to some emails, Adam is now sending Gary an email with the subject of “fucking technology” and a quick message but she sends it without letting him inhale and finish his sentence.

Gary is now having Gina read an email from Adam that was clearly from Siri dictating him, hilarious insanity!

 

BB says this is why we’re #1 after hearing about the subject matter Adam was requested to play on the show…

Adam is now asking why Siri doesn’t give more time, Adam should be using an android device it works exactly the way he is requesting it, superior to Dragon naturally speaking that Bonaduce used to brag about on the KLSX ACS in 2007.

Adam is now sharing the misunderstanding he had with Gary, Gary corrects himself and Adam is riffing up a storm, hilarious picture he painted of Gary.

 

Gary says he thinks the new version of Siri might have a fix, Adam says his lesson is he shouldn’t try to do anything, it’s his fault for hoping or trying.

Adam is now back to autonomous cars and why he’s for them, he would like a car that just takes off instead of letting people delay traffic with their slow “aging pig woman” reflexes to quote George Carlin.

Adam is now talking about how we could eliminate traffic just by forcing people to drive properly, Adam is talking about the CHP guy who was directing traffic and how they pulled around someone who made a mistake and stalled out who then freaked out on them for attempting to go around them and speed things up.

 

Adam is now back to the clusterfuck of traffic he encountered and he says the people driving in the city and those running it are too fucking stupid to get things moving.

 

Draft Kings

Adam and Sonny are going to pick their fantasy teams in the draft tonight, BB mocks Sonny’s choices but Adam reminds him they paid off quite well last year edition

 

3rd Caller Britton or Britain, he’s bummed that Adam isn’t coming to Phoenix this year, he wants to know if Adam has a plan for the birds and the bees talk with the kids.

Adam is now sharing how deep into adulthood his daughter is already in comparison to his son who wants nothing to do with it.

Adam says he’s going to treat about how he’s been treating food, not make a big deal out of it and BB mocks Adam for having Vinnie Tortorich come over to tell them what to eat and what to avoid.

 

Adam says the main flaw with women is they react to information “because it’s coming from you” and how therapists will tell you that you need a third party to explain it to the spouse.

Adam needed Vinnie to come in and explain what he had been sharing about food and Adam jokes about having Dr. Drew and Vinnie act out some stuff to give them a visual.

Adam doesn’t want to give too much energy to the kids growing up in this way, hilarious one liner about Drew and Vinnie showing them a physical variant on the birds and the bees.

 

Adam is now joking about coaching up a hobo to give his information secondhand to his wife.

Adam jokes about his father having the “talk” with him and Adam riffs about his father’s palatial estate, complete with a library, atrium and a study, hilarious scene they’re all painting.

Adam is now describing his father’s wardrobe including the pointing work on his crushed velvet coat, Adam is riffing as his father, talking about their walk down the never-ending hallway in his father’s estate/manor showing their bloodline of relatives.

 

Adam says he came home from school with a boner to his piece of shit home and nobody ever talked to him about anything, they wrap it up.

 

4th Caller Julie, she says he needs to dictate his texts and email via the program, Adam doesn’t want to hit the hands free button and have it inept him, she says what he wants will be available in a year.

She wants to know about people who call their kids food names, Adam jokes about his use of Philly Cheesesteak and she has a peanut allergy theory.

Adam says he likes that she can find something that doesn’t even bother him and complain about that, Adam hates 3 middle name people.

 

Adam says people have done the last name math, funny burden of the middle name point and Adam says people are doing a lot of that, oversharing extra names nobody cares about.

Adam is asking Julie if she’s single and she reminds them they have been down this road; Adam has a killer deep breath inhale practice like a deep sea diver to deliver his “shocking” holy shit!

Adam jokes about Marlon Wayans speaking of bigger fish that she has to fry, hilarious!

 

Carnivore Club

Cured meats in every box, Adam found this thing and got into the salami thanks to Vinnie edition

Adam got into some spreadable liverwurst like substance that he put on some delightful soft cheese, Adam mixes up Carnivore with Carnival cruise and BB corrects him.

“open up your world man” – Adam

 

They head to break

 

They’re back from break with Slim Jim Phantom making his return to the ACS, he was first on the show for ACS #644 back in 2011 with Lemmy.

They have a ‘Great Moment in Local News’ intro and Adam plugs Jim’s book, Adam says they pulled some stories off the internet and Jim says he typed the book himself.

Adam is now asking him about the beginning of ‘The Stray Cats’ and how they formed, Jim has it well prepared and explains how Rockabilly had a renaissance.

 

Adam is asking about the punk that was going on at the time, he shares how they went to England after playing locally in NYC.

 

Adam is now talking about CBGB and the title of the venue, once a bluegrass bar then the home of bands like The Ramones, why couldn’t they foresee a possible change where rockabilly was scheduled there.

Adam jokes about being able to smell Lemmy and if they knew he was in the audience when they were first discovered, Jim says Lemmy was a buddy and recalls when they last guested on the ACS together.

Adam is now asking him about the era, what years are they talking about when this was all going on, Jim tells them about the release for the record in the states and how he arrived in Los Angeles and just never left.

 

Jim says TJ is a huge fan and gave him a list of things to bring up, he tells them about Dave Edmunds and Graham Parker, Adam is recalling how they shared producing and song writing credits in that era of guys, that genre/scene.

Adam asks Jim about their first success stateside in 1982, Adam asks about the Rolling Stones and if they had any rules about touring with them, Jim says they came and went as they pleased, some nights Jagger would come out and announce them up front in his full stage regalia.

Adam asks about the early indicators of this being a big business, live touring and the recording industry.

Adam asks how Jim’s folks took this news and his success, he says his tattoo was reacted to similarly.

 

Adam talks about how weird and unusual the ‘Stray Cats’ were for their era, he cites the standup bass and Jim has some really eloquent points about the rockabilly genre and Adam asks about Brian Setzer and his talent.

Adam is now saying that when you’re Britney Spears you need to fit into a role because you don’t have the chops, but Brian has the chops and can put out what he feels like releasing and people will be there.

BB shares his feelings that they should be in the rock and roll hall of fame, he talks about their legacy and how much they experienced overseas when it comes to how other cultures process our media and what they consider to be traditional “Americana.”

 

Adam shares his Lou Reed got in, let us in theory for the hall of fame and Gina asks about Jim climbing Mount Everest, he tells them how it came about and Adam is bragging about Brian the caller who won the Mangria Moments with his legendary 9-mile hike, each way!

Adam brings up ‘The Fix’ and he finds out that the guy from the band was with them on the Mount Everest hike, Jim name drops some other famous artists who all climbed the mountain, then they followed up with Kilimanjaro.

Adam jokes about the 2nd day the music died if anything had happened on the mountain, BB finds out that Jim shares a book editor with him and Jim explains how he linked up with the guy.

 

True Car

 

Gina’s News

1st Story is on the death of Gene Wilder, Adam has a funny “bout time” joke and Gina has the details on Gene’s family he left behind.

Adam is now saying we need to name the douchebags in Hollywood so we can then praise the Henry Winkler’s off the town, Adam has a Katherine Heigl’s a cunt line and they move on.

 

2nd Story is on the LAX panic for an active shooter than never manifested, Gina shares how a guy dressed like Zorro waiting for a ride was apprehended.

Jim just flew through there today, Adam talks about people spilling out onto the tarmac and BB explains how passengers would reach it.

Adam would like to eliminate people being at the airport who don’t belong there, like TMZ for example, the airport is one big rule why this exception?

 

Adam says how about if you’re not flying, picking up or dropping off you don’t show up there, Adam jokes about people who want to drop their kids off to play at the airport, that person he is impersonating does not exist.

BB brings up the freedom of the press angle and Adam says you can’t just go film bridges in today’s world and Adam references ‘Zorro the Gay Blade’ as they riff about Jim possibly being the guy apprehended by airport police.

Adam doesn’t get why the guy was waiting for a ride at the airport if he didn’t fly.

 

3rd Story is on the musical trend known as ‘The Millennial Whoop” and she has a supercut example, Adam is now finding out that Zorro was from Los Angeles and he jokes about kids clamoring for a character from the 1930’s a radio serial hit as BB puts it.

Adam wants to know if it’s time to reinforce the bathroom door like they do the cockpit door, wouldn’t people feel better about having that security and Adam jokes about the first guy locking the door while everyone else is locked out to die with an active shooter.

 

4th Story is on the murder of Dwyane Wade’s cousin and Gina plays a clip from the local police in Chicago, Adam says there is a magic bullet to stop this and it’s the family, he says these are murderous brothers, BB has a “they’re related?” joke that even causes Adam to stumble and momentarily appreciate.

Adam is talking about moms and dads and how gangs appeal to people without fathers and without family, Adam says they have father figures, mother figures don’t work as moms are there, we need father figures to raise young men.

Jim talks about raising his kid and how it’s doable even when busy or while traveling for work etc.

 

Adam says kids will find a substitute for what they lack at home, his home lacked food, it was not a savory home.

Adam would leave the house and find his savory figure, his father John farmer figure.

Adam says kids, boys and girls have their own version of this, people will seek out replacement fathers and his son cannot join a gang as he has Adam and he will not permit that.

 

Adam says when you have a child you are obligated to stay and raise said child, Adam says you aren’t doing the right thing nor being a hero when you raise your kids.

Adam is not a hero for feeding his dog, it’s his obligation, we understand it with pets but not with human children.

Adam shares his stigma against smokers vs. deadbeat dad’s theory.

 

Adam is not happy about what this means about society, Adam says most people in Los Angeles would judge you much more harshly if you neglected a dog over a kid, Jim had two pit bulls and a kid.

BB has some George Michael and Adam mocks him, he honestly doesn’t know the track that BB seemingly had at the ready.

 

SimpliSafe

Mike august never had hands free as he’s constantly eating

 

5th Story is on Burkina Faso banning a biggest butt contest, Adam and BB both have never heard of the place, it’s in Africa and Gina tells them about her friend visiting Burkina and getting sick from eating river rat.

Adam and BB are riffing up a storm about river rats and how that is a cuisine likely to poison you, it shouldn’t have been a surprise.

Adam is now riffing about this being the saddest call that Sir Mix a Lot’s agent ever had to make, hilarious improv scene with BB and Adam as Sir and his agent, gold!

 

Adam is now asking Gina about the river rat and how her friend ended up so violently sick, she’s now in a medical journal and was studied for months.

Adam is now changing his stance on the big ass, when you admit the ass is too big for you, you are admitting you have a small wang, he says when you see a guy admiring a fat ass you presume he has a big dick.

Since Adam is not going to be having sex with anyone else for the rest of his life he should start pretending to be into big asses so everyone else presumes he has a big dick.

 

Adam is now talking about butt implants and surgeries, BB shares the reaction from a past guest, they bring up Heather Dubrow and Adam has a funny “dudebro” joke, Jim tells them about a musician with the same last name and Gain wraps the news.

 

Reverie Bed

Lynette stripped down too cool off while unconscious edition

Split the mattress to cut the slab, you can around and not transfer to the other person’s side.

 

Jim mentions mattress stores and their abundance, Adam gives out the plugs and wraps up the show.

Jim sings the praises of Mike August and how quickly he replies back with booking opportunities, BB has some more Gene Wilder to close out the episode.

Even Dawson is a bit stumbly for this one, the ep went too long perhaps and that’s why Adam was having trouble at the end too.