21 Jun Giovanni’s Superfan Sidebar 06/16/2016 – The Lady Gang and David Wild
A real time blog where Superfan Giovanni does recap and commentary on the show as it happens and opines on all things ACS
Guest – The Lady Gang and David Wild
Recorded 06-15-2016 – Release Date 06-16-2016
Production Number #1844
Adam reveals that he believes Mike Lynch simply chooses song lyrics that Adam likes when he’s too busy to write an original intro, Adam explains who ‘The Hollies’ are along with David Wild, Adam eventually gets to welcoming Gina and BB to the show and BB has some of Jo Koy’s Jon Lovitz impression as today’s #TopDrop.
Adam is immediately riffing with David about LL Cool J and he shares an anecdote of LL presenting at an award show.
David has some super in depth history on other artist’s connections to ‘The Hollies’ and Adam transitions to Draymond Green’s suspension, he says he was talking about this with Dr. Drew on The ADS.
Adam talks about the human brain not having caught up to HD cameras, he cites all of the flagrant testicular fouls inflicted by Draymond’s ankle, shin and back of his hand.
Adam is talking about this nail biter of an NBA Championship and Adam brings up Stephen A. Smith’s appearance on ESPN where he gave his opinion on the suspension.
Adam asks if he can use his magic button to pause and play the clip, Gary tells him he can and Adam asks why he sounds so upset about it, Gary says he’s not.
BB is now describing the final foul slap to the balls, BB says he hates it when another player steps over a guy in an insulting/dominating fashion.
Adam interrupts him to make it clear it wasn’t caused by flailing, it was intentional.
Adam says he’s not a huge LeBron fan, but he was trying to dis Draymond, who Adam says whacked him in the nutsack for what he did.
Adam says what the league is saying is ‘LeBron’s a douche but you can’t kick him in the nuts” and Gina asks if this has been building between the two men.
“Well here’s how you can avoid being suspended for a game that is this important, do not traumatize the other player’s nutsack” – Adam on personal responsibility.
Adam says that Draymond should have been playing the long game with the nutsack trauma, spread it out over many seasons, not in one playoff series.
Gina says she’s never said this in her life “but man I’d like to see that basketball replay” and they watch the ball slap.
Adam is talking about his time at Lettuce Amuse-U and the hot chick who left her number and then pretended to not remember who he was.
Adam is doing a Stamps.com Live Read
Sad worn out vinyl flooring, sad! Edition
David brings up balls in the read, Adam moves forward.
BB is now sharing the story of the time a date took off to make a phone call, they met through a mutual friend and went to see Harland Williams standup comedy.
BB shares how the woman kept sending him mixed signals, Gina asks if BB detected any redness in her eyes when she came back after the phone call, Gary laughs like crazy from the other room presuming weed, Gina was implying she might have been crying with an ex or over a recent ex.
They all weigh in on BB’s weird date and Chris gets on mic to share his own personal story of this.
Chris talks about the woman running her fingers through his amazing mane of hair and Chris used her number to follow up and ended up getting a haircut as he learned she had a boyfriend.
Adam talks about women having a super power over men and how they won’t destroy a guy but they will fuck with him, Adam jokes about taking driveway estimates while making a bizarre analogy to what women do with men.
Adam says the male version is the cop who drives under the speed limit to fuck with civilians in traffic who won’t speed past him even to go 60 mph.
Adam is doing a Lucky Tackle Box Live Read
Q and Ace
1st Caller Matt, he’s calling about this very same topic and tells them about swiping right on Tinder, Adam jokes about this hot chick that Matt really wanted to have sex with.
Matt shares how he was weirded out by her initial responses, he says that he figured out it was a dude and was even considering still going for it.
Adam is now asking for another survey; what percentage of dudes are willing to still go for it after a person has transitioned genders with surgery.
Matt talks about her strategic photography angles and Gina has a funny “piece” comment, Adam is now asking Matt to walk them through the process, they talked for 45 min. and he says she got the hint that he wasn’t into it.
David Wild asks Adam if he’s seen the new OJ Documentary that has a transitioned person in it, a journalist, he’s trying to make a broader point about the acceptance and increased presence of trans people in this country but Adam cuts him off as they move on to more calls.
2nd Caller Lee, he’s got a one night stand story, Adam says that he got sex, cry me a river and tells Caelan he’s 0 for 2 in the screening department today.
3rd Caller Mike talks about approaching two women at a club, he showed interest in the less attractive woman as he presumed her hot friend was too good for him.
Mike shares the surprise husband twist to this weird encounter, Adam talks about women seeking validation and attention, Adam says it’s the massage vs. the lap dance.
Adam says that women can get totally naked and have some dude oil them up for 55 min. to enjoy a specific form of contact they like, yet men and lap dances are viewed very differently.
Adam jokes about the huge black man with the turtle neck at the strip club that prevents men from stripping nude and getting covered in oil, unlike the Burke Williams.
David asks about Adam’s stripper ex-girlfriend “Cat” and he shares his “Cat scan” joke and describes ow tame the strip club was, he describes how he first met her after leaving the drag joint during Philip the Juggler’s bachelor party.
BB now teases a story of a clown at a bachelor party.
Adam is doing a Round Up Live Read
BB is back to his teased story and he tells them about the clown that was hired for a buddy’s bachelor party, BB describes how the clown wanted to hang out and get drunk.
Adam says these ass-wipes deserved exactly what they got, Adam has a killer “allergic to real titties” one liner while describing how he first met his stripper ex.
Adam was telling Philip what a douche his buddy the best man was, Adam had this guy pegged as a poser jerk and Adam describes how he dispatched Philip’s accountant to collect money from each person at the wedding reception.
Adam is asking if there is a douchier move than what that best man pulled with pretending to pay for the food only to then collect at the worst of all possible times.
David makes Adam reveal what happened to his Stripper Ex “Katlyn” and he explains how they broke up after Adam’s trip to Hawaii and he skips over her living with his grandparents.
“I would assume every just hates me” – Adam on all of his exes and all people.
4th Caller Robert, he’s got his own version of this story.
Adam is interrupting to share the detail of his stepper ex choosing a childhood school photo for the strip club, Adam explains how funny she was to choose that picture.
Adam takes it back to Robert who tells them about taking a date to The Grammy’s and he explains how her mood changed after a phone call.
Adam is talking about dudes being out and being “fully out”, Adam asks Mike about where he saw him while he was out in Los Angeles, he wants to give the tackle box to Robert but he feels that mike’s story is better so he gives it to him.
David is plugging his new show with Arsenio ‘Greatest Hits’ and Gina updates them on “Toomgis” and his name origin, clarifying the spelling and pronunciation, they listen to a clip of him as Adam predicts his doom much like other failed bizarre mascot attempts.
They head to break.
They’re back from break with a listener voicemail about kicking one’s dad in the nuts, funny question for Adam. Keltie Knight
Adam welcomes Becca Tobin and Keltie Knight are making their ACS debuts, their 3rd cohost Jac Vanek couldn’t make it, Adam mistook Jac for a dude and they correct him after a few beats.
Adam is asking them about their bigtime guest bookings for the podcast, he asks them how they got together for a podcast.
They explain they made the show for a real world conversation about being a girl (woman) in the modern age, Adam is talking about auditioning and addressing their point about having other people in charge of your career.
Adam is forgetting the story about his stripper ex who found the ad for the ACME theater and he showed up the first day, he couldn’t be kicked out as he was grandfathered in, wow.
Becca tells Adam about acting and the podcast and how each job woks schedule wise.
Adam is now asking about women leading men on, Keltie talks about women leaving their “Taxi Light” on and Becca reveals she’s never been dumped.
Adam recalls a bit from ‘The Man Show’ about contacting all of his old ex-girlfriends and he tells them about being used to install a free closet by a woman leading him on.
Adam talks about his skills, humor and good looks/shape and how none of that factored into women seeing him as a long term partner.
They ask when Adam’s luck changed and BB has a Jimmy Kimmel joke mocking Adam, Adam talks about meeting women at the ACME theatre and how that would go down.
Keltie wants to know if Adam has practiced naked stretching and he says he can’t do it because if anyone walked in they would presume he was blowing himself, Keltie is talking about her nude yoga masturbation show technique for keeping her husband satisfied and her flexible.
Adam says the real victim in this scenario is the duvet cover, wow!
Adam asks the “did you actually change your mind or were you never going to do anything” question that guys ponder, Becca tells them about noticing earwax or funky fingernails or something else that grosses her out and how that will cut a night short.
Gina has her own half a big toe example, she references The Farrelly Brothers and Adam talks about men and their feelings about feet.
Women project their interest in nails by grooming their own, Adam days men don’t care nor about jeweler either.
Adam says that many of the things women do for themselves are things men don’t care about, Adam doesn’t care about a hairy bush, a skanky bush.
Adam says he doesn’t want to run into dry gravy from last week, simple hygiene would be nice but hair ain’t (isn’t) a deal breaker.
Adam says tattoos are neither here nor there, he gets into the deeper meaning of a tongue stud and Adam says he uses Bryan as a baseline heterosexual man, he’s not over the top like some Italian guy cliché, nor does he carry a man purse, he’s baseline man.
Keltie and Becca talk about men listening to her show and how they were surprised they had such a wide audience and that it wasn’t just women listening.
Adam talks about his manner of speaking with his wife and how he talks too much like a dude, Adam shares his “dicky reply” where he asked to never have another crate discussion again.
Lynette asked why he was being a douche about it, he wasn’t and he makes a larger point about communication between men and women and Keltie confirms his take regarding women and the endless conversations they’re often ready to have, they want to explore the majesty of the crate as Adam puts it.
Adam is saying he talks alike Cockroaches move, you don’t see them jogging, it’s either lighting speed or dead still.
Adam is back to the crate training call and his presumption that she went out and bought a crate, Adam says the dog let itself right into the crate and hung out after Adam assembled it, a really good sign.
Adam is now doing a Castrol Edge Live Read
Koenigsegg professional driver edition
Adam interrupts her first story to make a point about women feeling like progress had been made by talking about something, Adam doesn’t have an ounce of that in him.
Adam is asking if this is resonating and The guests agree that women aren’t doers, Keltie is making a point about connection and the desire to be closer to a partner.
Becca has a point about female leaders and conference calls, Adam asks if she’s spoken for and Keltie has a point about her pal Becca.
1st Story is on the little boy who was drowned by an alligator at Disneyworld, Keltie says the park has signs saying that it’s not a play area, Gary says there were no signs, there were no gator signs but there were signs.
Adam is saying he’s tired of wild life and he says he’s putting it out there for the dentist to shoot another lion and Adam shares why he’s pissed about the gator not eating the kid, just like in the reverse scenario he wants the hunter to eat what he kills.
“now we got a dead 2 yr. old and an empty gator, nobody’s happy” – Adam
Adam is talking about the father wrestling with the gator and trying to stop the child from being stolen has to be many steps worse than getting a phone call and hearing that it happened.
Gina talks about this being the 3rd horrible thing to happen in Orlando within a week and she mentions the 3 big tragedies.
2nd Story is on Obama addressing labels and his lack of use of the phrase “radical Islam” and Adam makes a point about pussies and their false belief that understanding and kindness will bring people around to your POV.
Adam talks about Sharia law and how it’s all centered around a bully mentality, the only things that bullies ever understand is a punch in the nose, Adam has a funny “We don’t use swords!” comment as he offers some F-18’s in exchange for Allah’s wrath.
Adam says that if the United States were bullies we would annex Canada, he’s got sound logic and he says we got to put a balled up fist in their fucking face and makes a point about radicalized Islamic people in America.
Adam makes a point about the hypocrisy of inner city street crime and he cites Ben Affleck’s insane ‘Real Time with Bill Maher’ appearance from last year.
Adam is making a point about the use of the term tragedy, the little boy was a tragedy this was terrorism.
Adam says that the notion that we might insult or offend the Muslim community is insane, he comments on how we go out of our way to apologize to and for them and make it clear we don’t blame them for the radicalized people from their faith.
Adam wraps up his perfect summation of terrorism in 2016.
3rd Story is on Elton John’s onstage freak out and threats to cancel a show, they play a clip and Adam says he has a trifecta of bitch, he’s gay, rich and old.
Adam talks about straight guys not having the same range to bitch as a gay man, Gina has more details on a recent Elton John freak out regarding a Piano that wasn’t tuned right.
Becca wants to take a moment to address the security guards who ruin everything for everyone, Adam’s gilded cage of minimum wage and he talks about visiting Jimmy Kimmel on the Comedy Central lot when he was taping ‘Win Ben Stein’s Money’ and he goes over how inconvenient the parking lot guards were.
Adam says he just leaves now, they ask about Adam’s astrological sign and it all makes so much sense now.
Adam is talking about the time he showed up at E! to tape ‘The Soup’ and was turned away by the security guard and actually left after the guy refused to help him.
Adam shares Joel McHale’s empathetic apology and his very civil reaction, Adam jokes about lying about being Beyoncé to get access.
Adam and Gina are doing a Life Lock Live Read
Gina reports on Katy Perry’s hacked twitter account edition
Keltie shares their new term “Dicksand” from their podcast and they explain it as they wrap up the show, Gina has her own variant and Adam mentions his term ‘The Behymen’ and gives out his plugs before wrapping up the show to an “enjoy this baby” drop of Keltie talking about her nude Yoga sessions.