Giovanni’s Superfan Sidebar 05/28/2014 – Jeff Ross

Giovanni’s Superfan Sidebar 05/28/2014 – Jeff Ross

A real time blog where Superfan Giovanni does recap and commentary on the show as it happens and opines on all things ACS

Guest Jeff Ross

Recorded 05-27-2014 – Release Date 05-28-2014

Production Number #1333

Show Page

Adam is opening the show recorded on his 50th birthday with a request for fans to buy his book, then he and they both get a gift.

BB has a predictable but excellent #TopDrop from the Shaun White episode.

Alison is telling them about falling asleep thinking about drops, Adam is giving a plug for their live show from Irvine tomorrow night, and Adam and BB have a mix-up about the word “while” but neither comments on it.


Adam wants to talk some Godzilla with BB, he’s now recalling his review and Adam is mentioning the things he doesn’t understand.

Adam is joking with Alison about her not seeing the new Godzilla because she’s a “Toho” filmmaking purist, she rolls with the comedy and Adam is now brining up his point.

Adam is getting to Bryan Cranston’s hairstyle in the film and trying to discern his age upon filming, BB is now on mic trying to split hairs about his age, annoying extra talking.


Adam is now bringing up how they cut to 15yrs later and his hair was even nuttier but still one solid color and not balding in any place.

Adam is really pissed about their not being any gray around his temples, Great porn movie makeup effects riff about them putting gray on Peter North’s temples and balls, hilarious Nabisco riff in character in one of these movies.

Adam is now mocking the use of “Anything!” in old sitcoms, as a reply to people who say they will do anything to get what they want/need.


BB is now asking if Bryan wants his hair to make a comeback after years of being bald on TV, Adam is now offering up a BJ to Gary from BB if he can find a picture of the hairstyle.

Adam says Aaron Taylor Johnson the lead, looked like a young Jay Mohr and he’s sharing how it bumped him a bit.

Adam is telling them about attempting to use the airport lounge while on the road, bringing Matt with him so he could experience it up close and personal.

BB clarifies what airline that is, indicating he’s travelling beyond his means.


Adam is now asking why he can’t visit, he says in 7 minutes he has before takeoff there is no way he could butt funnel all of their finest top shelf booze, what’s the hold up?

BB asks about a hypothetical all 1st class airline, Alison tells him that’s “Net Jet” and Adam is now talking about the shitty omelet in 1st class, leek omelet.

Adam wanted to take a leak on the menu, fontina cheese, leeks and bruschetta.


Adam is on his standard “is it served on the ground” riff and Alison is making a point saying these menus are like the dream of someone who doesn’t know what is actually fancy vs. what sounds fancy.

Adam is now telling the airlines and Gate Gourmet they can’t pull off the things they think they can, he’s got an obese man attempting a high dive without a splash analogy.

Adam says he would be happier with Domino’s Pizza and makes a point about In-N-Out Burgers, he wants to know how many passengers would choose a 1$ burger over what they’re serving.


BB messes up the under promise/over deliver adage, Adam’s now riffing about his list of preferred cheeses for omelets. Made up Unicorn cheese beats Fontina for him, gold!

Adam says it tasted like a shitty cheese omelet and he tells them to offer a Denver or cheese omelet, Alison wants to know about Organic oats and Adam says we’re all doomed.

Adam is now bringing up the billboard he passed when heading back from LAX, he’s bringing up the “Beyoncé” Chime foundation billboard and Adam is stating how much he dislikes dumb/obvious pronouncements about change without ideas of how to implement them.


Adam is now outdoing them, he’s invented a time machine to go back and wrong every injustice toward women, Alison is now adding animals to the list and he’s saying only the ones he could get new cheeses out of for omelets on airplanes.

Adam is now sharing some real messages for billboards, he’s now arguing against Beyoncé and her chiming, he’s mocking these jack off billboards and causes that seem to have no plan or actual purpose.

Adam is now sharing some better ones, air pressure for car tires, less prescription meds, take care of your kids.


Adam is now looking at Cranston’s hair and he wants another photo of the man out in the wild, he calls Gary a hero but has not followed up with that BJ promise from BB.

BB is now debuting the new Richard Banks song in tribute to Adam Carolla’s 50th birthday, BB says it was a Rich Banks original and it’s great.

BB labels the original song a “Tool Tune.”


Q and Ace


1st Caller Paul, he’s telling Adam to have fans go and change the Amazon link of their friends and co-workers so he collects on even more sales. Adam seems ok with it but then recommends just telling them to do it.

Paul explains that his family would be oppositional, hence why the secrecy, no time to explain to old people and tech morons that it doesn’t hurt them or cost them anything, Adam seems to get it.

This has actually been suggested on this show, so Paul heard it here first or he heard another podcast with a certain host who was mentioned during the Godzilla chatter who has “borrowed” that ide and ran with it.


2nd Caller Peter, he gives a shout out to the late Greg Giraldo, what?

He wants to know about NASCAR and its effect on the warming of the earth, Adam wants to know if he was asking this with his tongue in his check.

Adam is now sharing what he learned on Real Time about the rest of the globe and their contribution to global warming, he’s calling it narcissistic for us to think our 300 million are doing worse things to the planet than the other several billion people on earth.

Gary now clarifies the name of the guy on Real Time and Adam is joking about celebrities getting a new Prius and that solving the problem of the people in India now getting their first jalopy spitting out charcoal briquettes.


3rd Caller Matt, he wants to know out of Adam’s 50 birthdays which one was the best.

Adam is now bringing up one of his most disappointing ones, he’s telling them about the time Thomas, his high school buddy who had a big screen projection TV and a satellite dish too.

Thomas lured Adam over to a surprise birthday party to see some titties on the big screen, Adam was letdown that it was his 18th birthday party and not a titty movie viewing party.

Adam says his entire graduating class was outback, like 200 people, wow!


Adam is explaining that Jimmy has arranged for a group 50th birthday party and Adam says the best one if that one that he’s yet to celebrate yet.

Adam is now doing a live read.


Hooray for Baldywood

BB saw X-Men “Days of Future Past” and he explains some of the behind the details, Alison doesn’t have any info about the sex scandal and Adam seems to know the most.

BB calls this X-Men “All Stars” and BB is asking Adam if he has seen the movies, Adam is now going off on Wolverine and how homoerotic it is, he’s mocking his peers who are obsessed with this stuff still.

Adam says he’s seen one of them, probably X2- X-Men United, probably after Patton Oswalt and Brian Posehn praised it on 2004 Loveline.


BB calls it a pretty good movie, he’s explaining the plot.

BB is now offering up a T2 plot explanation for how they handled this X-Men movie, Adam calls it the “Tommy Tune Wolverine” and is now mocking BB for not knowing who he is.

Adam is trying to figure out the connection Hugh Jackman has to Tommy, BB is now bringing up the writer Simon Kinberg and his script for “Mr. and Mrs. Smith” and how he considers the movie underrated.

Adam is defending it, he says what’s not to like and offering a “home wrecker” angle for people judging the movie.


BB is now bringing up the Quicksilver scene used in X-Men DOFP and the perfect scene he’s used in with the song “Time in a bottle” and now Adam is figuring out that Hugh Jackman played Peter Alan, not Tommy Tune.

Alison is bringing up the accusations and giving some of the details, Adam is being fair and now taking it back to the movie and says he’s ok with Jennifer Lawrence taking some time off, he’s sick of seeing the same 3 people in every movie.

He’s fine with people taking breaks, Alison is sharing how she interviewed Patrick Stewart and he mentioned Jennifer Lawrence saying they would have her over to dinner, she’s telling them how big of a fan Patrick and is wife are of Jennifer.


Adam is now doing a live read for Pet Flow and has a killer joke about ordering it to your neighbor’s door if you have low self-esteem.

There now heading to break as Adam makes a point about how much time you want to waste in life doing busywork like buying dog food.


They’re back from break, Adam is enjoying some banana cream pie and Jeff Ross if making his 11th appearance on the show, and he’s mocking Adam’s eyebrows.

Adam is asking Jeff about how he got into Indy racing and wound up at the Indianapolis 500, Adam is joking about them explaining racing to Jeff with funny Jewish comedy.

Adam is telling Jeff how great of a guy Mario Andretti is and how they interviewed him for the documentary, he was very gracious and refused to brag or steer the conversation back to his work.


Alison wants to know the difference between Indy racing vs. other types.

Adam says Indy is American Formula 1 racing minus some of the technology, he explains why Indy is used in the title, Indianapolis.

Adam is now bringing up Jim Neighbors extreme vocal range, super high and super low.


Jeff is telling them about watching Marco Andretti race, Adam is now bringing up the biggest races across the globe.

Jeff is telling them about the race over the street of Detroit and the goofy jokes he told them about not stopping during the race.

Adam is asking Jeff about travelling to NYC to perform at “Caroline’s” and clarifies the demise of his show “The Burn” and Adam is now asking Jeff about the Don Rickles roast/special airing Comedy Central.


Adam is doing a live read for the comedy special, Jeff jokes about BB’s memorial 5yrs ago, comedy gold!


Alison’s News

Jeff is now telling them about his love of pizza, he loves the “tip” and Adam brings up the amber colored grease and Alison and BB are adding to it nicely.


1st Story Is on the leaked cover of a CIA chief in Afghanistan, she’s explaining how the White House revised the list and Adam wants to know what that person has to do now that their cover is blown.

Adam says that’s the best news ever if you’re that person, you get to leave Afghanistan with honor and Adam is explaining why lying to protect your CIA cover is a forgivable type of lie.

Adam doesn’t mind fucks ups, he hates cover ups and lies, but he doesn’t mind fuck ups and he clarifies what he means.


2nd Story Is on Slut shaming and a new study about what happens on twitter, Alison is sharing how they calculated the results.

Adam is now getting to how he objects to this, Adam is clarifying that men don’t shame each other, Alison is now clarifying who shames women.

Adam jokes about disagreeing with some of that, Alison is explaining that the assumption was that men do this more to women than women who do it to each other, Female Chimpanzee Shunning behavior.


BB says it’s flawed research due to the gender bias of who uses twitter, he thinks more men use it than women.

Adam is bringing up the idea of someone sending a “you deserve to be raped” tweet to someone, he can’t even fathom the situation where a man would do such a thing.

Alison is explaining how it’s often used, Alison wants to know who is making women feel worse, and Adam says guys as a whole or probably doing it more on the internet and women more interpersonally.


Gary is now sharing the stats on Twitter and Facebook when it comes to the genders of it users, 40/60 and BB is amazed.

Alison wants to know “to what end” twitter is used for, Adam wants to know if anyone in the room has seen something they disagree with and then sent and angry tweet to someone in response.

Alison says it’s because “we’re sane” and BB shares how he saw a “Kike P” license plate and he’s now sharing his fake conversation with Niger Ennis about custom license plates.

Jeff shares his real last name and Alison brings up another comedian and his last name, Jeff mocks her and now Adam is asking BB about taking a picture of the offending plate in a parking garage, joking that he wasn’t walking around looking for offensive plates.


Adam is now telling them about reviewing “Goldeneye” for Kevin and Bean in 1995, he joked that the bond girl was “Coozie McVulva” and he’s sharing his argument with Jimmy about the FCC rules from the time.

They’re now looking at the plate and Adam is asking if they have to tile it out, not because of the offensive phrase but because of the identifier, Adam says it must be a Hawaiian guy and Alison has a great challenge wondering if Adam thought a Jewish person had this plate.


3rd Story Is on 8 ways to improve your likability at work, she’s reading them off and Adam is mocking them with Jeff.

Adam is saying he’s not a great “good morning” guy and he’s asking if everyone else has been shamed with a “Good Morning” when he says hello, like he used the wrong greeting.

Adam is now sharing how he gives a nice how’s it going grunt and is routinely ignored by his neighbors, he’s now mocking the people who defend the non-responders.


Alison is giving her take on avoiding contact with people she knows, she’s asking if it’s just her or a sign of the times.

Adam is now bringing up a moment where Lynette and him saw “Ruth” and went over the same process of deciding to say or not.

Adam is now bringing up people who use a honk to say goodbye with their car, Jeff shares his theory, he thinks it’s them testing their horns to see if they work, Adam explains they’re trying to be nice and instead or annoying.


Adam is now bringing up hotel elevator protocol, he’s sharing how you have a choice to hold the door or let it close, Adam says go in the corner and look at the floor, he says then you can’t be caught in the uncomfortable situation.

Alison is agreeing with Adam and asking why we are supposed to be alert in an elevator, Jeff is now suggesting a bizarre Las Vegas theory and Adam immediately shoots it down.


Adam is now sharing how you have to try to talk people into not being interested in hanging out with you, Adam is now saying he would love to see a reel of people underselling an event vs. hyping it up for someone you’re very excited to join you.

Alison is sharing the “get rid of gossip” element of the list of things to make you more likeable, Adam is joking with BB about matching Jean Jackets and trips to bars for nightcaps on the road that BB hasn’t been invited to join them at.

Adam is now doing a live read for Legal Zoom.


Alison lists the 3 other items on the list, she clarifies “Do Your Job” for Adam and she’s commenting on the last two.

Adam is now sharing an anecdote of using an existing time limit on the microwave, Gary is now mentioning that he sees Jeff and Chris bring a lot of food to the microwave, Chris is saying it’s not him and Gary is clear he’s only reporting facts, not throwing anyone under the bus.

Alison is wrapping the news, Adam is doing a live read for a Video Game… a deer hunting game.


Adam is giving out the plugs and wrapping up the show.

Jeff calls Adam a real comedian, he’s joking about it being like him telling a young lady she’s now doing hardcore porn, after evolving from magazines.

Adam is explaining that he never did standup, not because he couldn’t, because he didn’t have to, he always knew he could and he says it felt good because now people can’t use that against him, he’s part of the club.

Jeff calls standup the rawest version of Adam, nope that’s the podcast and radio before it, facts.