20 May Giovanni’s Superfan Sidebar 05/17/2016 – JL Cauvin and Jo Koy
A real time blog where Superfan Giovanni does recap and commentary on the show as it happens and opines on all things ACS
Guest – JL Cauvin and Jo Koy
Recorded 05-16-2016 – Release Date 05-17-2016
Production Number #1823
Adam opens the show to a funny parent teacher conference intro from Dawson and Lynch, Adam has a “thank you, thank you, thank you!” intro of his own and BB has a great “What The Fuck!?” #TopDrop
Jo compliments Adam on rocking his JK hat and BB has an immediate attempt at something negative, Jo calls him out on it and Adam say he was just talking about something like this with Dr. Drew on ADS #344.
Adam says he was talking about BB to fuck with him and he further jokes about BB bringing Christie in because it’s serious, BB has some decent acting in reply.
Adam explains what he was talking about and BB attempts to bail out and say he’s not that guy, Jo says he does it a lot and Adam is bringing up the “Down Rounders” (Round Downers) and Adam says BB is smart and the guy you would want on your trivia team.
Adam jokes about bringing BB with you to pick out wedding dresses with your daughter and how he would give her an eating disorder, great for Trivia, not for that.
Adam is now explaining the way certain people always round down with their numbers.
Adam says BB does what a lot of intelligent people do, along with lawyers where they feel the need to present an alternate POV and Jo jokes with BB about this being a personality intervention.
Adam is now citing his philosophy major friend who made everything a pain in the ass with his hypothetical questions that never had any end or definitive solution.
Adam talks about Mark Geragos and his years of practice that factors in to him not shitting on a point, Gary is on mic and he promotes ‘Reasonable Doubt’ and Adam talks about speaking with Heather Mills last night.
Adam was distracted as he was trying to eyeball the fake leg, hilarious woodpecker comedy and Adam explains he spoke to her for a while.
Adam mentions the things that remind you that life is futile and things are hopeless, in addition to BB’s commentary on the show.
Adam is now recounting a conversation with a family member who didn’t bother buying a used copy of a book that is nothing but stories from a shared childhood.
Adam asks what he would have to write and include for someone to pull the trigger.
Adam asks why the person can’t just lie and says they already got it and it was funny stuff, just bullshit him out of common courtesy.
Adam is describing his conversation with Heather Mills and he busts out his great impression of her, he recounts how she was the last person to interview Paul Newman, she told him about her history with Paul and her beer she used to brew.
Adam tried to tell her about his own beer and documentary about Paul Newman, Adam asks what are you even going to do, we should all kill ourselves.
Adam says that Leno brought up ‘Winning: The Racing Life of Paul Newman’ and asked him what the family thought of the documentary, Adam has no idea, it’s perplexing that nobody seems to care.
Adam is back to how nice Heather was, he’s just trying to make a point about how we’re living in a world where we’re not even aware of our own favorite things, she would love the documentary but will never see it, the director told her he made it and she just kept going, does she have a wooden ear too?
Adam is back to the woodpecker attack on her leg, Gina is in the mix and Adam is talking about Heather and luging.
Adam brings up how he saw Dr. Drew pre and post Dodger game and then when passing him at the KLOS radio station, Adam mentions taping Dan Patrick’s show “behind LAX” and that morning commute was awful.
Adam brings up the freeway signs telling motorists to “share the road” instead of saying “look out for motorcycles” instead it would make more sense, Adam is critiquing them for loving their little cute phrases and rhymes.
Adam says they should sell the freeway signs out to Pepsi and Nabisco, or even Sony when they’re having their next movie released, use the profits to add an extra lane.
Jo brings up the hypocrisy at play and how they would refuse advertisers for fear of distraction but they’re already distracting people.
Adam asks if most Californians would agree to this plan, if 100% of the funds went back into the roads, Adam has a great “raining semen” joke aimed at former Mayor Villaretardo and his Telemundo reporter extramarital affair.
Adam brings up a nice smart young woman he met at the Geragos party and he describes a young man who crossed in front of him and did the head down, walk slower move.
Adam teases the meeting with the friend of Geragos’s daughter he met who had some pertinent info for him, Adam was all “oh do tell” and he teases it before a live read.
Adam is now doing a Castrol Live Read
Dustin wants to know about using a heavier weight in colder temperatures, Adam says you want thinner grade oil in a cold environment, he says lower viscosity in colder temps. Edition
Adam gives some lessons on tire pressure safety and Gary gives them info about summer heat contributing to tire blow outs, there you go, Gina was right.
Adam is now riffing about gauge and they move on.
Adam says the young lady came up and bragged about blowing through every left turn arrow she encounters, her friend happened along and she attempted to tell her about the concept of running left turn arrows.
Adam is now demanding if he must explain this to every person, he’s mocking her “but do you really trust other drivers” and Gina has an impression of the same sentiment, Jo thinks she’s serious the acting is that flawless.
Adam is now talking about how cops pay attention and get alerted to movement, they sit at the bottom of the hill to catch you sleeping on your mph/gas pedal.
Adam begs people to please, please start doing this and asks if people really trust the man that much.
Adam says if you do get as ticket tell them Adam sent you and to suck his dick, fight the tickets.
Adam shares how Drew told Adam about wanting to move up to a football game, he wants a fly over and Adam jokes about managing his expatiations, he’s not getting F-18’s.
Jo suggests Arena football first, echoing Adam’s joke from ADS #344.
Adam is now predicting how Drew could get brought in for a last minute replacement for someone who drops out, Adam told Drew to be always ready to step into the octagon.
BB kisses some ass with Adam being the “go to late night guest” and they move on.
Adam is doing a True Car Live Read
No More Haggling Edition
Q and Ace
1st Caller Justin, he compliments Jo’s podcast ‘The Koy Pond’ and he asks them about his daughter’s dance recital and how ‘Puttin’ On the Ritz’ during a child’s tap routine reminded him of Rich Banks and Mike Lynch’s classic ‘Cummin’ on the Tits’ and Justin admits he called in as an excuse to play the song as Adam mentioned his intention to start doing on the last episode.
Adam talks about his day with Dan Patrick and calls him a good dude, Adam says the Kitchen remodel at his home is wrapping up and he told Rob to set everything in front of the spots where it goes and to use a piece of cardboard to pull the oven and the dishwasher.
Rob only found his daughter’s cardboard project and how he let Rob use it, he goes over the internal logic and makes some great points.
Adam says that his daughter’s project was a cut and paste job, it was so cut and pasted it made no sense.
Adam asks if he’s interested in seeing his childhood art projects, Adam says keep the Color Me Mine mug, don’t smash that in front of them.
Adam is making a point about fire hazards and how gas powered dryers are the biggest cause, hot water heaters and leaning cardboard.
BB has a killer one liner and Adam has a great topper saying “he wants to know too, now that we’re here” wow!
Adam says if he wants to recall these projects he will just pull up a photo of his wife crying, Adam says this was an F- effort with a D- result.
Adam says there are no happy memories and Jo says he can’t throw his son’s tests and projects away; Jo says his son’s mother throws it all away immediately when he gets home.
Gina now explains some advice she heard about getting rid of childhood projects and art.
Adam asks about family mementos and photographs, Adam says there is a digital archive of his kid’s life and they have more than 3k pictures per kid that account for more than the 3,650 days they’ll have been alive this coming June.
Gina asks if she can ask a question and Adam has a funny “no” and she then persists and asks about Sonny’s “Body Blood House” art project.
Adam is back to the open house and how his sons was so far down he would have had to take a knee to really eyeball it.
Adam says it looked like a watermelon raped a salmon and they are looking at what Sonny’s project is supposed to look like and the actual “Body Blood House” and Adam says his son is writing a book, it’s part of his book idea and he’s not concerned as he’s such a kind person.
Adam says it’s not because his son is dumb, it’s because he doesn’t care and he can’t make him care about pointless shit like this.
2nd Caller Wilmer, he wants to know who would be most embarrassed to admit they had a sexual dream about him.
BB has a great “Hi Gary” drop and Wilmer clarifies his question asking if it was someone outside of the studio, he says Olga as he doesn’t really have an answer.
Adam talks about his bizarre non sexual dream, Adam is commenting on gender and gender neutrality, Adam comments on having Robert Palmer/Power Station’s ‘Some Like It Hot’ stuck in his head, like an insane form of self-torturing Tourette’s.
Adam is trying to recall if he had any recurring dreams, he shares the stuck in the locker room can’t make it to the field “didn’t work out” dreams he’s no longer plagued by.
Adam says he doesn’t associate this podcast with work and someone like Matt might have more of a problem with that.
Jo weighs in and BB is waiting to share his recurring dreams, Gina dreams about her teeth falling out and she’s unclear what that could be about, it could be her grinding her teeth.
She shares her other recurring dream and Adam has one of his own about not being able to play while live on stage with a band.
BB shares his dream about having to get to JFK to fly away from a dorm or small apartment he just packed up, it’s always s about being late and missing the flight.
Adam comments on the relief of waking up to discover your dreams were fiction.
Adam talks about dreaming of someone stealing Paul Newman’s race engine and the moment of thought trying to figure out the reality you’re in and if the engine was stolen or not, Adam has “Down rounder” dreams.
“I wake up now like shit my parents are still alive!” – Adam in reply to Gina’s honest point about dreams, everyone loves it and Adam gives out the plugs for Jo as they head to break, Adam doesn’t know if URL’s have spaces.
They’re back from break with JL Cauvin making his 6th appearance on the show, he talks about performing standup on the road and the get into his latest video.
They’re now watching the video.
Adam cuts it off before it ends and he compliments JL’s work, Adam is now marveling at how Trump will top his own comments with a “Number #1” comment and he mentions personal momentum and BB weighs in with his observations, Adam comments on personal momentum being super attractive to some people.
Adam is now joking about ‘Timecop’ and JL busts out a JCVD impression, Adam is now describing JCVD shirt off, Gi open trying to ask out Jenna Elfman, very funny riff and now JL is acting it out, funny line in there.
Adam is further comparing the personal momentum of Trump against the personal momentum of Bodhi Elfman.
Adam is talking about Trump on ‘The Marriage Ref’ and how he was convinced they would have the biggest episode despite it seeming like a “sloppy seconds” panel.
Adam is commenting no how Trump will deny something 2 ½ times and get past the initial storm, Adam says it would be like your wife caught you fucking her sister and after lying 3 times your wife stopped asking and offered to make you pot roast.
Gina’s News
1st Story is on Donald Trump’s 1991 phone call posing as his own publicist, Gina has all of the details and plays the clip of Donald possibly posing as a publicist.
Adam jokes about Trump doing this with a phone call to Putin, JL is now acting it out.
BB references AJ Benza’s appearance on the show and what he revealed about Trump.
Adam would rather anyone but a victim in office, he’s tired of it and he is not surprised by anything that Trump has done.
Adam says he was ambushed with this and Gary says he’s been hearing that perhaps Donald Trump leaked it himself, Adam is trying to figure out the logic of this tape being leaked.
Adam is now sharing why someone would leak their own stuff to avoid someone else doing it for them and Adam has a funny “sound like a maniac” and asks Gary about his reply during the interview, if you can tell he chose to lie.
JL is busting out some more of his trump impression.
Adam is talking about Howard Stern becoming who he is and being able to say whatever he wants, it’s just him.
Adam says if anyone else got caught doing this they would have to pay the price, with Trump it’s expected behavior, it’s what he does.
Adam has a solid Mickey Rourke and Dennis Rodman comparison for how Trump can say and do whatever he wants, like Charles Barkley.
They have the clip of Trump being interviewed on air about the recording, JL remarks on Trump’s never ending bragging, how everything has a brag woven into it, like having a lot of people impersonating your voice.
Adam says we can all agree it’s him.
2nd Story is on the Blue Jays MLB brawl, Gina has all of the details and Adam says he heard about it on the Dan Patrick Show.
They’re now watching the brawl.
Adam is marveling at how boring of a sport baseball is and how the brawls are the only exciting moments, Adam has a killer “Drake got his ass kicked” one liner while talking about the Brawl and José Bautista’s resemblance to rapper Drake.
Adam was refusing to t drop the bit and kept insisting Drake got beat up on the field of a Major League Baseball game. Funny recounting.
3rd Story is on the “sweater” controversy for a recent KTLA news stunt, Gina has the clip from KTLA during the weather report.
JL weighs in on shaming and Adam says this is where Mexico has it right, let hot chicks in work out gear spit out the weather, to keep us watching, he says even the male anchors have cleavage.
Gina has the details of the stun and the “Librarian” backlash the meteorologist has received for her comment about being covered up.
Adam is doing an insane Stripper DJ riff with a library borrowed Herb Alpert record comment.
Adam explains he was at the barber and noticed a stack of library borrowed movies and it reminded him of his dad and his lame record borrowing past.
4th Story is on a cancelled Manchester united game over a bomb scare, BB shares his prediction about a terrorist act a soccer game.
Adam comments on the light aircraft that are circling the Dodger games in Los Angeles, he is sharing his morbid thought about a light aircraft filled with C4 and how nobody could stop that terrorist.
Adam asks how vetted the pilots of the advertising planes actually are.
Adam is doing a SimpliSafe Live Read
5th Story is on Dennis Hof’s offer to give Lamar Odom a freebie night, she reads his comments and Adam jokes about the two girls working for free and how that’s not exactly a compliment.
“The two girls that are dispatched to blow the 8ft man for free” – Adam
Adam is riffing about Dennis Hof scrambling to get an NBA player endorsement in the wake of Lamar’s overdoes and bad publicity for the bunny ranch, he mentions both Happy Hairston and Gail Goodrich.
BB brings up George Mikan and they both can’t figure out if he’s still alive or not.
6th Story is on Super Bowl 2018 being scheduled for Minnesota in the newly completed stadium that will be domed and 70+ degrees regardless of the temperatures outside.
Adam is now talking about Bud Grant and his youthful steel blue eyes, he looked like Viking in addition to being a coach and mascot of sorts.
Gina wraps the news to Adam’s drop of him saying he has a fair bit of ambiguous genitalia dreams.
Gary has some details about Bud and brings up “Harry Peter” Bud’s real full first name, much to the delight of the gang.
Adam and BB are talking about Jon Gruden and TV bullies, the child meets man face, much like the bully on The Brady Bunch.
BB brings up ‘3’Oclock high’ and Adam moves on but JL Cauvin brings up a guy who wants to get Endless Rant IPA into the cheesecake factory.
Adam is now asking about the Cheesecake Factory as a reference point, he tells them about texting his mom to meet him there.
Adam brings up the insanely long wait for a table there, it’s always a throng of humanity and Adam says he knows their menus is the magna carta but he doesn’t go somewhere for an abundant menu.
In and Out and Buca di Beppo are also highly packed as noted by Adam, Gina and BB.
BB affirms Adam’s theory about it being viewed as an easy point to meet and a safe place to get something to eat that you enjoyed enough last time you were there.
Adam is doing Life Lock Live Read
Gina has the assist and Adam gives out the plugs for JL’s social media and they close the show to Jo Koy singing it’s Raining Semen from the top of the show in reply to Adam’s insane one liner.