22 Jul Giovanni’s Superfan Sidebar 05/03/2016 – AJ Benza and Jo Koy
A real time blog where Superfan Giovanni does recap and commentary on the show as it happens and opines on all things ACS
Guest – AJ Benza and Jo Koy
Recorded 05-02-2016 – Release Date 05-03-2016
Production Number #1813
Adam opens the show to the tease of Jay Mohr guesting on the show but I presume based on the title he doesn’t make it, Adam explains why the shows are truncated and he jokes about frozen orange juice concentrate.
Adam is now ranting through the process of unfreezing it and preparing it, why not just buy orange juice in a jug, Adam says hello to Gina and BB and BB has a Jay Mohr “remember when I fucked all those guys” #TopDrop.
Adam is back to OJ concentrate and all of the various energy and effort spent to prepare it, he says he would make the same argument about powered milk.
Adam says you would have to get high on your own supply and taste the OJ content rate before mixing it, Adam says he would do a freeze on his gums like someone doing cocaine.
Adam says it’s akin to instant coffee which tastes like ass water and the relative amount of time and effort to make a real cup of coffee vs. an instant cup.
BB asks about Adam’s mom and her stance on coffee and juice, Adam shares how his mom would make them drink Postum as a coffee substitute and eat carob in lieu of chocolate.
Gina is now reading the ingredients of Postum and Adam is talking about coffee beans, the beans aren’t evil even if an evil corporation got ahold of the beans, it’s just a bean!
Adam says that carob is for people with low self-esteem and it’s a shitty alternative, Adam says you had to feel the pain a little bit, you had to have a lesser quality food and minuscule amount of joy equal not being down with the cause.
Gina brings up the diet cookies her mom would feed them growing up and they both mention SnackWells existing in the 80’s, though BB mentions the 90’s almost trying to correct her without correcting her as SnackWells didn’t exist until 1992.
Adam is doing a Castrol Live Read
Gary has the details on carob, including that it has twice the carbs and calories than coco.
Adam jokes about how he should have approached his mom and told her to ball up her fist and punch herself in the fucking face.
Adam says that BB has never been a rich guy for as long as he’s known him, but he doesn’t deny himself a rich life and the finer things and experiences.
Adam is talking about Bill Maher doing that thing where he claims to know what it felt like to be poor, Adam cites his college time at Cornell and implies he was probably not poor for long after school.
Adam says that Bill claimed poor people have to eat like shit, Adam actually ate better when he was poor and he says he eats far more decadently while eating out.
Adam says he had to buy a dozen eggs, make a pot of stew for 3 days of eating.
Adam brings up Bill’s “who can afford to go to Whole Foods” argument and Gina quotes Chris Rock who said he would need his dad to wire him 5-6$ so he could eat McDonalds breakfast but she says it’s much cheaper to eat at home.
Adam says when he was poor he was 20 lbs. lighter, he worked harder and moved more.
Adam says that never before in history would people attempt to include themselves in a group beneath them, it would be akin to trying to paint yourself as a racist, hilarious example.
Gina says that Adam came up in a conversation the other day, she shares the details about the scholarship kids at her friend’s daughter’s liberal arts school.
Adam now shares his Michael Moore “worth 50 million bucks, dresses like an out of work lesbian trucker” take on people posing as things they aren’t.
Q and Ace
1st Caller Kevin, he’s not answering and Adam has to go back to him and Gary gets on mic to let him know that the caller is using a fake name and they try to say hello to him.
Gary had the guy on the wrong line, they now have the real Kevin but end up with a woman laughing and Adam jokes about getting the Joker on the line.
This woman is losing her shit and Adam asks if he can be sued if she dies from laughing, Adam jokes about this being added to his list of achievements, killing someone via laughter as he’s too funny, like having his hands registered as a weapon.
2nd Caller Chris, she drives the van for seniors and has called before.
She just had jury duty and Adam is now weighing in and he shares his “my life would be better if once per week I went to the laundromat and organize my buck slips” theory for self-improvement and mental clarity.
Chris used Jury Duty to accomplish similar goals and she tells them about adult coloring books, Adam says that it came up on the ADS earlier in the day once again too.
Adam asks her what she drinks, Miller lite.
Adam jokes about his mother drinking and brings up his late grandfather Lotzi who would buy Shafer beer in a can, from the lucky super market, just plain off brand canned beer.
Adam is back to Bryan and his enjoyable life and how strategically picked his options well and he cites not getting a cellphone until 2005 as an example of saving money to spend elsewhere.
Adam says when he was broke he always looked forward to a softball game or a poker game with change on the weekend, Adam says you needn’t be miserable because you’re poor.
Adam and BB joke about Adam asking him why he was so happy when he was fat and poor at LoveLine, wipe that grin off your face BB!
3rd Caller Jessie, he’s calling about the modern era and lack of corner offices in businesses with open floor plans etc., everyone is on the same level and share a common space.
Adam is talking about the very subject and now Jessie is telling them about a boss who parks away from the building to hide his high priced car.
Jessie reveals he’s part of the agency that might have touched the “The Puppy Monkey Baby” ad and they wrap up with him and comment on the Mountain Dew Super Bowl commercial.
Adam is doing a Stamps.com Live Read
4th Caller Kevin, he’s now plugin Stamps.com and apologizes for not answering earlier, Kevin lists off the various similarities between Adam and Ricky Gervais.
Adam says he’s never referred to himself as “The Podfather” and now Adam is telling them that nobody can say ‘The Guinness Book of World Records’ without stumbling when introducing him, Adam says Ricky had that record before they took it.
Adam says he’s a big fan of Ricky and asks Gina about his Ricky’s twitter battles about atheism and Adam comments on the public having a preoccupying with people that aren’t them.
Adam has a “between Mexico and Canada” theory and now talks about trying to take people down or even just sending them shitty tweets and how he can’t spend time doing that.
Adam now spells out the idea, he says that instead of making a plan to succeed let’s hope and wait for Canada to fuck up and they we can look better in comparison to them.
Adam says instead we should try harder and do better, not hope to look better by comparison and he connects that to people trying to talk Ricky Gervais out of his atheism on social media.
Adam talks about people feeling threatened and he thinks we use it like we do “fear of success” it’s not a real fear of success, it’s a firearm of failing and falling on your face.
Adam is doing an Onnit.com Live read
Adam tries to talk his mom Kris into being ok with the Buffalo bars edition
1st Story is on Meatloaf’s condition after collapsing on stage, Gina has the details and Adam jokes about Bob Seger feeling really good about himself in comparison.
Gina has the footage of Meatloaf’s “most boring collapse” where he laid himself down on stage, Adam comments on dehydration in a world where everyone is surrounded by water.
Gina comments on how this could be a code for something else as Adam speculates further.
Adam talks about the code of “exhaustion and dehydration” being used for people dealing with addiction in famous bands.
2nd Story is on the death of Ron Lester, star of ‘Varsity Blues’, ‘Popular’ and ‘Not Another Teen Movie’ and Adam says someone tweeted him about this, he’s audibly bummed out.
Ron guested on CLL #869 WEDNESDAY, JANUARY 27, 1999 GUEST: RON LESTER & ELIEL SWINTON, CLL #1459 WEDNESDAY, MAY 2, 2001 GUEST: RON LESTER and CLL #1620 THURSDAY, DECEMBER 13, 2001 GUEST: CHYLER LEIGH, CHRIS EVANS & RON LESTER.
Gina has the details of his health and demise, Adam says he couldn’t have been older than 43 and Gina makes him look like a lying asshole on the air by revealing he was 45 yrs. Old at the time of his death.
Adam now wants BB to make a comprehensive list of “Tool Movies” and Adam stands up for ‘Varsity Blues’ and BB brings up ‘Not Another Teen Movie’ and Adam recalls Ron being a large man, he was over 500 lbs. the last time Adam saw him.
Adam is talking about Ron’s Classic LoveLine appearances and his habit of going down on prostitutes, Gina has a killer one liner and BB mocks Adam for bringing this up.
Adam now quotes his “renting a ford mustang, detailing it and returning it” reply to Ron.
Adam says he was really happy to hear that he lost all of that weight, Adam says Ron will be missed and implies especially by prostitutes having a candlelight vigil.
3rd Story is on a boy at an 8th grade talent show impersonating Bernie Sander, President Obama, Donald Trump and other political figures.
Adam now brings up Nike peeing its eyes peeled on young athletes across the country, perhaps SNL should keep their eyes on this kid and Adam jokes about getting him gag novelty equipment like Whoopee Cushions and squirting plastic flowers.
Adam predicts someone getting their nose bent out of shape over the kids’ impersonations and they wrap up the news.
Adam is doing a MyUSATrainer.com Live Read
Get paid to work out, Adam has more money but was happier when he had less and trained edition
Adam has some plugs and they wrap up the last new episode for a while.