17 Mar Giovanni’s Superfan Sidebar 03/17/2015 – Jason Shapiro and Dr. Bruce
A real time blog where Superfan Giovanni does recap and commentary on the show as it happens and opines on all things ACS
Guest – Jason Shapiro and Dr. Bruce
Recorded 03-16-2015 – Release Date 03-17-2015
Production Number #1532
Adam opens the show with Gina and BB back in studio, he thanks the fans for tuning in and mentions the holiday, and BB plays an out of context #TopDrop from Gina Grad quoting Bobbi Kristina’s bf.
Adam says that Mike August is back on track with carrying a box cutter through airport security, eh reveals the united side confiscated the last one.
Adam is says he needs it to get through Burbank before Mike can celebrate and pop that champagne, it was that airport where the last one was taken away.
Adam is telling them about his weekend and how he was supposed to begin filming ‘Catch a Contractor’ this Sunday, he says they cancelled the shoot in Vegas and moved it to LAX.
Adam says the earliest flight was 640am and he had to be in the lobby at 520am.
Adam asks if they ever experience the feeling of walking through the airport wondering about all of the people who were there and look well rested and alive.
Adam is asking who these motherfuckers are who can go to bed at 845pm, he says he can’t crash until midnight or later.
Adam wants chipper people to wear “tired glasses” Adam felt like he was walking through the airport in a dream and if people wore these glasses he would feel less shitty about himself.
Adam is now making a point about traffic in Los Angeles and how it adversely effects all human beings in the city, he is sharing a happy note.
Adam says he found a relaxation sleep channel on his Virgin American flight, much like the sleep channel Adam had on US Airways in 2006, BB is recalling a lot of the details of the channel and even name checks the woman who set it up and appeared on the morning show.
It was on KLSX ACS from April 06 2006, Lisa Tucker is her name.
Adam is sharing his argument for a sleep themed audio station and how it only helps the airline run smoothly, Adam is lamenting the lack of relaxation sleep channels on other airlines.
Gina asks about the soundscape, BB finally addresses Dr. Bruce who’s been in studio for 12min, Bruce has some “prickly news” about penis surgeries.
BB plays his intro music, intentionally getting him to stumble.
Adam is doing a live read for the Burger King Croissan’wich
BB asks for a more French pronunciation and they marvel at the almost universal high quality of croissants.
Bruce has the details of the world’s first successful penis transplant, he calls this a landmark procedure, and Adam is asking how this conversation goes where the surgeon tells the wife that the circumcision went poorly.
Bruce isn’t filling Adam in on the details of the non-sterile circumcision practices in South Africa, Adam has a killer joke about the penis being like ‘Gay Eye’ and motivating this guy to act out.
Hilarious fingerless gloves back and forth between the new cock and the new host, Adam is joking about trying to find a new cock that is at least the same size.
Adam asks about cock transplants if it’s included in organ donations, Bruce is reading the copy and quote the “little prick” line that Adam deems groan worthy.
Bruce is now telling them about the penis reduction surgery, Adam jokes about this sounding like a prank phone call to the surgeon, A teenager calling about his dick being too big, good stuff.
Bruce is now quoting the ‘Freakenomics” study on condom failure in India, Gina has the details on the global penile length average, Adam has a killer “Cock and Ballywood” one liner.
Adam says it’s mostly India effected by this, Adam jokes about guys shopping for condoms the same way they step up a couple sizes when picking out weights at the gym when alone vs. when someone else is there.
Bruce is now commenting on the herbal supplements that don’t actually contain any of the ingredients listed on the label, Adam asks where one goes to get the real shit. It’s a study he’s quoting on the contents of popular supplements brands
Adam jokes about Swedish Fisherman, forgetting about Onnit labs there past sponsor and nobody is aware of Ray and Terry’s line of products.
Q and Ace
1st Caller Hilary, she’s calling with a music comment and tells them about an organ titled song that is a strange coincidence in light of this topic, she is now asking about the message of organ donation and Adam is ranting about L.A. being a shitty town and he cites Seattle and Portland as examples of cities that know how to prosper and can actually run.
Adam is commenting on the huge camps of homeless people they have in L.A. and he’s on a crazy rant, she says derailed and now Adam is ranting about light rail systems, he asks what other city doesn’t have a light rail that heads into the airport.
Adam is saying that Los Angeles rests on its “fiery orb” laurels, the hot blonde of America that refuses to study, too pretty to try hard or need to.
Adam’s “fiery Orb” rant of 2015, Ace Awards material for sure.
Hilary wants to know if any social message songs hit home for him, he’s citing “here comes the sun” and now says “(What’s So Funny ‘Bout) Peace, Love, and Understanding” and calls it a perfect mix between over and under produced, he is now having BB play it and he’s offering up some light commentary about his favorite parts.
Gina brings up Trevor Moore’s song from last week, Adam says he keeps playing it for his kids and BB brings up the ‘Runaway Train’ music video and Adam has a killer Blind Melon one liner, gold.
Adam forgets to list and Bad Religion songs, as per usual despite his love for the guys, Hilary is surprised and asks a follow up question and offers up some other examples. BB has a funny fuck you for her.
She brings up Macklemore and the song ‘Same Love’ and Adam says he’s not interested in ‘We Didn’t start the fire’ and says it’s like drinking a cappuccino and reading a history book.
Adam asks if any of these songs actually done shit, it’s been 40 years since his example was released, what has been accomplished.
Adam jokes about pumping this music into ISIS headquarters to change their hearts and minds, this music only works on the already informed.
BB plugs the Los Feliz daycare twitter handle run by Jason Shapiro, he says that Mike August was reading him some examples.
Gina is now reading off a few.
Adam is doing a Lifelock live read
Gina backs him up per usual
Bruce is now sharing his final Health watch topic, he tells them about misused medications among college students, he says the drug use doesn’t actually improve the grades or performance based on studies comparing them to students who don’t use.
Gina is commenting on railing pills, while distancing herself from the activity, Adam makes note of that.
2nd Caller Tom he is asking Adam about ‘Road Hard’ getting nominated for an award, he wants to know what his Golden Globe speech will be.
Adam would thank his agent Babydoll Dixon then make a plea for him to watch the movie, finally.
3rd Caller Brian, he watched both of Adam’s movies over the weekend, Adam says they’re not the same movie but does cite a conversation with a backer while in Chicago.
Adam says the main difference is the lead gets to tell jokes, instead of his role in ‘The Hammer’ and Brian quotes a favorite moment from the movie.
Brian is talking about people leaving their shopping carts all over parking lots, Adam hates when people leave it in a spot.
Adam says we stopped judging and the downside is now its game on with all of the shitty behavior, “because of the lack of judging going we’re showing a lack of judgement.”
Adam is talking about how he puts gum in his pocket instead of spiting it on the ground, Adam is now making a point about the life of the people who take the extra time to return carts vs. those who do the work and fulfil their societal responsibility.
Gina wants to know if we should outwardly call attention to these people and make a point, humiliate them in public.
Adam says he did Chris Hardwick’s Nerdist podcast, he says they taped it where he used to record MTV Loveline, unclear if this is last appearance or an as yet unaired one, he has already done 4, this would be his 5th, I wonder if the cohosts show up and laugh this time, we’ll see.
Adam is telling them about being punished for honking his horn at a guy standing outside of an apartment building conducting a conversation while clogging up the entire street.
Adam says that if that move doesn’t cause you the feeling of a pipe cleaner up your urethra then you are broken, we’ve lost it as a society.
Adam says just start honking, Adam is now bringing up the douche who slapped the back window while in Seattle, Adam says these guys need to be run over to send a message.
Adam forgets the time we were in Seattle and a cyclist got uppity at a light, we joked about actually invading his space and putting him in danger and what his reaction would be like then vs. us pulling up to a stop at a crosswalk on a rain slicked road downtown on a downhill angle, Lynch and August were present too.
Adam is doing a Drop Stop live read
Adam is commenting on Mike renting a Ford Flex over a something else, he says that was the same vehicle they were in for the fateful trip to “Squanto’s retreat” and the Foxwoods Casino.
We’ve also used those when I drove them on the road, Adam is telling them about Mike dropping the phone while driving, Mike is now on the mic defending his rental of a Flex, he jokes that ford is on the line calling off their advertisement deal.
Bruce gives out some plugs, Gina is kind to him and they head to break.
They’re back from break with Jason Shapiro making his ACS debut.
Adam explains that Jason worked as a script coordinator on ‘Cristela’ and Adam says it’s fucking insane the amount of money and time wasted in television production.
BB has him explain his role on the set, he is sharing how he got the opportunity to work on ‘Cristela’ and Adam is asking him about the writer’s room.
Adam asks if he is the guy who sits on the keyboard while they watch it on the monitor, he says the revisions need to be done quickly and every minute of delay is equivalent to tens of thousands of dollars.
Adam is commenting on how the first choice and impulse is often superior to the rewrites and revisions, Adam comments on how bright people like Kevin Hench hate wasting time and Adam says there is nothing more reassuring than having a bright guy next to you like Kevin, he’s funny and funny is good, but he needs super smart because that he doesn’t got.
They’re going over the variety of pronunciations for Los Feliz, Adam asks him how he thought up the twitter account.
Jason says that he came up with the twitter account after spending time with families, Adam says that Los Feliz is a huge pussy magnet, not for sex, for cowards and people who baby their children and interfere with them.
Adam talks about giving his kids breathing room to succeed or fail, he mocks pre-K and jokes about creating a water soluble lube mid rant.
Jason is sharing his perspective and how he gets the information about parenting almost through osmosis due to proximity to these people.
Adam is commenting on feigned concern and people pretending to be outraged by the Alec Baldwin swearing incident du jour.
Adam is commenting on these “Dragos” these kids made in the lab, how are they ever going to humble themselves to take our orders at Arbys or Applebee’s.
Adam is joking about “cart shepherds” and Adam is now joking about the guy who can’t push the full cart train, he’s bitten off too many carts for him to chew on and struggles with returning them to the store.
Adam is commenting on his twitter handle and how it will succeed or fail based on its merit, Gina asks him about developing that into a TV show and tells him about having text conversations in shorthand using lingo from his twitter account.
1st Story is on Gay and lesbian groups being allowed to participate in the St. Patrick’s Day parade.
2nd Story Is on the Justin Bieber Roast that taped this past Sunday, she has some jokes and an audio clip of Jeff Ross saying Justin has balls for attending it.
Adam is commenting on how brutal the roasts can be and how everyone seems to go long, Adam is citing the Eddie Griffin set from one of the roasts he attended.
Adam brings up the Pamela Anderson roast and Jason says that Martha Stewart killed it on the roast, Adam comments on the writers coming up with material for her.
Adam compares it to the white house correspondence dinner, Gina says that Maureen McCormick killed it during the Larry The Cable Guy roast.
Adam is commenting on how the jokes work and how he and everyone else on the dais gets it too, carpet bombing with jokes.
Adam is screwing up his memory of the Greg Giraldo and Nick DiPaolo “you’re half Mexican right?” story, he remembers it was Nick DiPaolo.
Adam is explaining how they probe you like Russian spies, Gina asks him about writing his own material, and he says he does it himself.
Adam is now explaining when you want a team of writers backing you up vs. when you don’t need it, without any judgment.
3rd Story is on Michael Douglas op-ed piece on his son’s experience with anti-Semitism in a southern European hotel.
Adam is joking about people correlating negative things in society with downturns in the economy, hilarious let me find a kike one liner, completely out of context.
Adam is now saying that Europe is far shittier when it comes to racism than America and quietly gets away with it, Adam says America talks a lot of shit, but doesn’t follow up with it by tasking actions.
Adam and Gina are talking about the fans throwing bananas at black players even on their own soccer teams, adding on to Adam’s longstanding take on soccer related racism.
Jason sassy he loves Michael Douglas but wants to know if he’s still trying to throw people’s attention away from his comments about his cancer being caused by oral sex/HPV.
4th Story is on Jimmy Kimmel’s comments from SXSW about the first year of ‘Jimmy Kimmel Live’ from 2003 to 2004 and how he wanted the network to pull the plug due to his exhaustion and being overwhelmed with the lack of bookings and pressures on him.
Adam says that’s why he was a guest 36 times, Adam says he’s down to once or twice per year now.
Adam says he was explaining to someone today about the first 5 years of JKL and how he’s now overcome that, Adam says after a decade he finally got the show to come into its own when it comes to reception and popularity.
BB asks if Adam and Jimmy give credit to ABC for standing by Jimmy and the show, he says god bless them and says you need that 5 years to get into the groove.
Adam says his biggest beef with the A-Listers featured on the wall of fame in the dressing room, he always feels like Jimmy wishes he had one of them over him, he wishes at least Tom Arnold or someone could be up there so he could feel ok about himself pre-show.
Adam is doing a dollar shave club live read
Mike August is on the mic again with a funny one liner about Michael Douglas.
5th Story is on the Martin Scorsese helmed Mike Tyson biopic starring Jamie Foxx, Adam says they will be doing the big party for the Newman Documentary at the El Capitan Theater.
Adam is telling them about trying to secure a parking area, first getting approval to use the space next to Kimmel’s theater but only to find out it’s booked for a band performing that week.
Adam hoped it was a band he has a connection to, it was Jamie Foxx performing, and Adam says it’s probably racist but he assumes Jamie isn’t into racing.
Adam says he’s too tall to be Tyson, Gina says they’re using the Benjamin Button technology, Gary has the heights of Tyson vs. Jamie, he finds out he’s actually shorter.
“Wanna stand on a Newman car” – Adam to Jamie
6th Story is on the 10th season premiere of ‘Keeping up with the Kardashians’ and the ongoing efforts of Kim and Kanye who are trying to have another child.
Adam is telling someone to tell Andy Warhol so he can roll over in his grave, Adam is commenting on the former rule of 15 minutes of fame no longer existing.
Adam says we’ve lost track of that and he comments on the 5 years of ‘Jersey Shore’ that has now ended, BB comments on how people have tacitly agreed to forget she got famous from a sex tape.
Adam is commenting on being a real DJ and how they must be poised off that anyone can do your job, evidently it almost takes 0 skill to perform, Adam jokes about Paris Hilton as a guest “Cellist” (Cellist), gold!
7th Story Is on ‘Tech Nick” caused by texting and using tablets, she’s joking about noticing it and now Adam is sharing the conversation he had with Mike about needing him to go hands free with his phone, Adam was drinking a beer and wanted him to not attract attention, awesome.
Gina wraps the news.
Adam is doing a Smart Things Live Read
Adam is giving out the plugs and wrapping up the show, he has a funny one liner about Mike August and plugs BB guest hosting a show on CNET (thanks to former staffer Logan who still produces TFV) I presume as he also produces the CNET show.