27 Jan Giovanni’s Superfan Sidebar 01/04/2016 – Cousin Sal, Adam, Gina and Bryan
A real time blog where Superfan Giovanni does recap and commentary on the show as it happens and opines on all things ACS
Guest – Cousin Sal, Adam, Gina and Bryan
Recorded 01-03-2016 – Release Date 01-04-2016
Production Number #1728
Adam opens the show with a warm greeting and mentions the staff get healthcare this year, thanks to the loyal fans who support the show.
Adam welcomes Cousin Sal back to the show and they immediately get to the James Babydoll Dixon dinner story teased at the end of last year.
Adam is going in depth on the guest list and how Mike August found his way despite a lack of an invite, Adam brings up the truffles that changed the game this year.
Adam is now riffing up a storm about the first 9 courses of exotic seafood, Adam is ranting about Kimmel’s love of the shaving of pier pylons and barnacles, hilarious ‘Castaway’ comedy riffing about Kimmel and Kellison.
Adam is getting Sal to start quoting Babydoll and his upset pleas for no more truffles, Adam talks about Babydoll ordering desserts from McDonalds and his 9yr old handicapped taste buds.
Adam cites the 40yr fruit roll up on his stepdad’s bedroom ceiling, “John came in my hair once” – Adam impersonating his mom sharing why they have separate rooms, they wrap up the discussion of the chip thrown at the wall of the restaurant.
Sal shares the Jason Sudeikis story form a past dinner where they attempted to break Dixon’s credit card.
Adam is getting to the wild card of the truffles and he now quotes Dixons and impersonates him yelling about how he wasn’t going to pay for them.
Adam is having everyone guess the total bill, Gary is asking if they can sweeten the action and Adam brings up the chip that was thrown at the wall and his prediction it will still be there, undiscovered for all time.
They’re now looking over the bill and Adam gets Gary to explain “The L.A. Charge” used to subsidize employee healthcare plans.
Adam is ranting about the broken logic of business not paying employees and requiring them to get by on tips, Adam says that he thinks the unspoken fear of snot and contaminates in your food forces people to comply.
Sal brings up his kid and the hover board and the battery explosion risk they run, in proximity to Adam’s cars, trying to freak him out again.
Adam shares his new idea for making the holidays a little easier for the people who celebrate Christmas in this country, after his kids and wife presumed it was easy for him to set up his daughter’s zip line and his son’s drone.
Adam is further explaining this new genius creation, he tangents off about his daughter and her love of the childhood equivalent of speedballs, he says “good luck to her first boyfriend” (at college) and after further riffing about his daughter burning out her pleasure centers.
Adam is explaining the Shabbos goy/Shabbat goy, he brings up the free time of Jewish people around the holidays, they love money and aren’t making any on this day normally, they are good at following instructions, funny “black friend” comment and Adam shares the name ‘Heebus Erectus’ and explains how it all works.
Hilarious “Elijah” comedy and he’s back to how serious he is about this idea, Sal exits the studio and Adam shares the story of his new dog ‘Phil’ he starts by telling them about his first puppy Lotzi he got in in 1998.
The Tragic Story of Lotzi – WEDNESDAY, APRIL 15, 1998 – GUEST: SHANE • HOST: ADAM, DR. DREW
Adam explains how the late Molly Girl came into their lives, already trained and no longer a puppy, he gets into his no puppies edict and explains the logic behind it.
Adam is telling them how much Natalia wanted a puppy for Christmas and teases the rest of the story but goes to a live read first.
Adam is doing a Blue Apron Live Read
Old Guy (Olga) hacks the advertiser’s edition
Adam is riffing about his daughter being like a merchant a Turkish bazar, hilarious improv scene with BB.
Adam keeps doing this weird mouth thing and saying “My Friend” and he says she rats him out when he uses his dad voice.
Adam explains how Rob was being threatened with eviction while the puppy was in his custody, Adam explains how Christmas morning went and explains that Natalia pre-named their new dog Phil, adorable.
Adam explains the behind the scenes maneuvering involved to get Phil to wander into frame while Lynette was filming the kids.
Adam explains the reason for the name, Gary gets on mic and they talk about the late Phil the Juggler.
Adam is explaining how his kids and wife react to his logic, he describes a “Don’t Stop Believing’ car ride doomed for disaster and a pothole Adam is clearly warning them about.
Adam says that he made the proclamation no more puppies and he talks about the midland level wood floor that he calls shitty/cheap and he explains that the dog found the worst possible place for a wet messy dump.
Adam says it was the corner next to Natalia’s bed, the novelty white shag carpet only under her bed frame.
Q and Ace
1st Caller Frank, Adam interrupts to observe the shitty picture with the gang and comment on it, Adam tells Gary to take it down he’s about to puke in his coffee.
Frank is calling about his own family dog dilemma, he doesn’t want one and Adam is explaining all of the Christmas related hazards for small dogs to either get sick on and or destroy.
Adam is back to Frank and he tells him to get a mellow 1 year old dog.
Adam is describing the one good date night they had during the break, they left the dog home and thought it would be ok, Adam explains the “let’s never let this happen again” and how everyone can shit on an idea but never seem to have an alternative suggestion.
Adam explains how the dog shit on the same spot of shag carpet again after he had to watch Lynette bust out the carpet shampooer and clean up the shit, he is emphasizing “never again” and how it’s the greatest thing you can do for someone is help them help their future self by avoiding “the pothole of life” and Adam is now shouting over “Don’t Stop Believing’ and gets deep into the dog shit and temporary amnesia cloud of everyone around him.
Gina asks about the dog’s age, Adam and BB do another lap with the Journey song and Adam gets back to the date telling them about the crime scene of poop they came home to.
Adam is describing the scene in graphic detail, he explains that Lynette warned him about the shit on the collar and he says he reached right into it, Lynette described these events from her POV on a recent FCOL – Down with Parades
They’re now playing the Christmas morning of any child’s dreams, you can see the video on the website, and it’s wonderful!
Adam is mentioning how BB brought up last year that he was never sure if his family was poor or not, that leads him to his theory on hos fucking easy and cheap it actually is to be a good parent, how little is actually needed that’s material.
Adam talks about Phil pissing while jogging in the house, he is giving a ‘State Of The Union’ perhaps the shortest and most after thought of these.
Adam is talking about his upcoming documentaries and how art seems to snowball, citing the biopics about some of the subjects he’s making a documentary about, now finally in production after years in limbo.
Adam is singing Tarantino’s praises and he explains how Mike August has never seen a Star Wars movie and compares it to his own lack of purchasing lotto tickets.
Adam is doing a Tommy John Live Read
Tuck your balls edition
2nd Caller Andrew, Adam has some line confusion and then gets the right guy.
Adam thanks the fans for supporting the Newman doc and says they have over 30min of the upcoming doc finished and it’s shaping up nicely.
Adam is now taking it to the caller who wants to repair the relationship with his wife’s parents, he didn’t ask permission for their daughters hand in marriage.
Adam is now asking Andrew about the numbers of him and his fiancé, Adam wants to know how they line up.
Adam brings up the junior editor Brian and how prefers nothing on his hotdogs, Adam says he found out that his twitter handle is @NoMustard and he’s now ranting about Andrew who works over at the other shop and also prefers nothing or just ketchup on his hotdogs.
Adam then turned to Rob for sanity who reminded Adam he’s the guy who just like ketchup on his hotdogs too, Adam is now sharing the “met her at a bar” confusion regarding a girl this Brian character met, Andrew then stepped in and explained that he arranged the date on Tinder.
Adam is now getting into the modern era of dating and calls himself the crazy person for being surrounded by ketchup on hotdog loving lackeys.
Adam tells Andrew to blame his generation, hat in hand and apologize.
1st Story is on Bill Cosby’s arraignment, Adam jokes about this possibly helping Cosby’s career as he mocks Gloria Allred and her retarded logic.
Gina has the details about Bill’s wife having to testify, Adam is asking about her previous interviews and now Adam asks what Bill should do, does he kill himself now?
Adam is sharing his idea for The Coz to go down to a homeless encampment downtown, he’s first riffing about hobo accessories.
Adam is back to his idea, he gives a guy some cash, an 8 ball, some mad dog 20 20 maybe.
Adam wants Cosby to stage an arson scene and rescue of homeless guys, with a cyanide suicide ending.
BB brings ups JoPa and asks if this is different, Adam brings up how he was from a different place and time and wasn’t abusing anyone.
Adam is saying he’s unsure what JoPa even knew, they move on.
2nd Story is on the Miss Universe blunder with host Steve Harvey, Adam is now contrasting this contestant to Reggie Bush and how he got his Heisman stripped away for merely driving a car off the field that in no way affected his performance.
Adam is sharing the mixed up numbers and commas he’s used to, he’s now back to the contestant and says she wasn’t humiliated and it’s bullshit she’s walking around being a victim, Adam says she comes from a place where they cut the heads of off kittens and put them in T-shirt kittens and fire them at elderly people for fun.
Gina sets up a clip Gary says they don’t have.
Adam blames the pageants for inventing “1st runner up” and it’s only destined to confuse people.
They’re now watching the clips of the blunder from the pageant.
Gina is sharing the “Happy Easter” meme that Steve shared over Christmas.
Gina wraps the news.
Adam is doing a True Car Live Read
Adam gives out he plugs and wraps up the show, including a new Take a Knee.