Greg Fitzsimmons

Adam and Greg Fitzsimmons

Adam and Greg Fitzsimmons

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Show Summary

Adam opens the show with complaints about the LAPD being fundraisers instead of protecting and serving the citizens. More specifically, he speaks about the recent accident that took place in front of his house, and the slow response from the police. Adam then takes a listener call about the moment he knew he ‘arrived.’

Greg Fitzsimmons joins the show next, and talks with Alison about recovering from her recent surgery. Alison then begins the news discussing the results of the Iowa caucus that are still coming in at the time of recording. The guys also talk about the recent trend of ‘glitter bombing,’ and some updates on the LA arsonist.

Wrapping up the news, Alison talks about the 16th season premiere of The Bachelor. The guys also discuss record high Superbowl ad prices, and Adam recalls when Dawson was uninvited from Kimmel’s football Sundays. The show ends with the guys discussing a very unusual way to prevent bear attacks.

Show Credits

Producer: Mike Lynch
Producer: Mike Dawson
Audio/Voice Over/Post-Production: Mike Dawson
Newsgirl: Alison Rosen
Sound Effects: Bryan Bishop
Technical Director: Chris Laxamana
Researcher: Gary Smith
Show Summary: Matt Fondiler

Image Gallery

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  1. Joe Santos
    Joe Santos01-04-2012

    Oh yay fitzimmons. I wonder if he is going to regale us with more lies about what a tough guy he is.

    • Cyrus

      You should take the dildo out of your ass.

    • Doug

      I guessing within 5 minutes, fitz gets in to some sort of sexual perversion talk. I hope he’s only on for like 20 minutes.

    • j3w

      I’m glad I’m not the only one who noticed this.

      Be careful, Joe, Fitz might fight you. He does that. Fights people.

      Sidenote, holy shit, Dawson looks exactly like he sounds.

      Second sidenote, no jack cheese at Pizzeria Bianco, Dawson. People don’t stand in line for two hours to eat Papa John’s pizza topping.

      • Cyrus

        If I were to take issue with something about him, it’d be that retarded shirt he has on celebrating arguably the worst Prez in history.

  2. Police for hire
    Police for hire01-04-2012

    911 ignoring a drunk driver wreck report should be big news. Now that it’s publicly known I wouldn’t be surprised if this is all over the news soon.

  3. Sluggh

    The world’s creepiest dude. And yet I’m the moth to his flame.

  4. ted

    fell over laughing at the kodiak bit

  5. Chad

    He is totally creepy, but I love listening to him. I’m just waiting for the geniuses on the board to start getting all pissed about him being liberal.

  6. Johnny

    Lynette should have told 911 that the guy was illegally parked in front of the house. That would have probably brought at least three cruisers.

  7. Andrew

    Hey Man Show! You can podcast from anywhere. Get an airplane. The question is will you do it now or later?

  8. Steve Hatchett
    Steve Hatchett01-04-2012

    Fitzsimmons is not funny but I like him anyway.

  9. Jeth

    Alison is a member of the press, she can get the 9/11 tape… both of them. Let’s have a long running crusade I want heads to roll!!!

  10. Dan

    police dont have anything to do with speed cameras or red light cameras, they are all run by private companies

  11. Melissa

    Way to start off the New Year. I was laughing out loud at work. HIlarious. Where can we find that song?

  12. William Cochran
    William Cochran01-04-2012

    Thanks for putting up the archived shows. Loading up the Ipod. Get it on.

  13. Jerry

    Always split on Fitzsimmons. He can be great, but like Eminem, I never believe a 155 lbs dude who claims to be a badass. As a matter of fact, if you go to my website and listen to my podcast, I actually talk about it. http://www.IamAFatLoad.com why not help me become 1/10 as popular as Carolla and I’d be eternally grateful.

  14. Brazilana

    Why no current USTREAM shows? How about a status update on what’s going on with the video aspect of the show.

  15. Dick Face
    Dick Face01-04-2012

    LMFAO!!! AIDS-MACHETE…The white guy with a fro who enjoys chopping pussy up left and right!

  16. big jim
    big jim01-04-2012

    Gotta agree with the whole cops turned fundraisers jag. But here’s a tip: next time you get a chicken-shit driving ticket, DO NOT ask the cop, “What, the bake sale didn’t go as well as you guys hoped? That’s why I get a ticket?”
    Trust me, no good will come it.

  17. GuyDudeBro

    Something about greg makes me wanna punch him in the face, this must be Aces way kissing sterns ass

  18. John Fitzsimmons
    John Fitzsimmons01-04-2012

    Uncle Greg is a handsy creep.

    I like stoned Alison.

  19. dan

    Bill Withers is Black

    • Jbro

      Bill Withers is Black

      Yeah, I said to myself immediately, is he joking or just plain stupid?

  20. Fiyah

    Get it on!

  21. GB

    Will Arnet is rollin is his grave.. .. know its early but this ep could be one of the years best in 12 mnths..

  22. Hot Nikks
    Hot Nikks01-04-2012

    All chaps are assless.

  23. Sergio

    Why doesn’t Adam ever pay for paperview events ? He loves boxing and he will not get it at his own house? This is blizzard for me, it’s not like they are 700 dollars. By the way I know it has nothing to do with today’s show. Just saying.

  24. cow12

    until there is a massive lawsuit and massive firings nothing will change in LA.

  25. scout

    I witnessed a hit and run on the 405 early one morning – called 911 so I could give the make/model and license # of the guy who took off and 911 ARGUED with me…they didn’t have a report of an incident… I said that was because it just happened and I was reporting it…more arguing…I had to force her to take down the info, the guy was still driving in his wrecked car on the 405 and she wasn’t going to do anything! They BLOW. I moved to Santa Barbara.

  26. Boutross Boutross
    Boutross Boutross01-04-2012

    Hell yeh you can get the 911 call made public. Get tit on!

  27. Erina

    Such a great show!

  28. stnuntrnd

    If only the episodes were still on Ustream, we might be able to gauge Alison’s reactions during the talk about trial pregnancy and superbowl halftime exhibition.

  29. jim

    What is going on with adam and kevin smith ?

  30. yoman

    Aceman’s on celebrity apprentice yippieeee!

  31. Pike

    I must be the only person who enjoys Fitz; he and Adam work well with each other. Adam and Greg’s bit at the end about beating off was hilarious!

    • David

      You’re not alone, really enjoy the pairing and I like Fitz’s casts when I’ve got time. No one matches up better with Adam for any of the role-playing bits.

      • Pike

        When I first posted my message, all I saw were anti-Fitz comments. It’s nice to know that there are some Fitzdog fans out there. Get it on, bro! 🙂

  32. Jeff

    I always enjoy hearing Fitz Dog. He’s one of the funniest recurring guests on the show.

  33. Ross

    haha, bill withers is black, btw

  34. P D
    P D01-04-2012

    Bill Withers is black. I thought you were cool. Now, I’m doubtful. Adam: I will miss your rants/shouting matches with Donny.

  35. JimmyK

    I LOVED the Will Arnett callbacks.

    Sorry, Greg. But that was funny!

    Fitzdog you are STILL the MAN!

  36. Mike B.
    Mike B.01-04-2012

    No mention of Billy Dee Williams? C’mon Bald Bryan.

  37. lauren

    love greg fitzsimmons. i’m starting to like his show more than adam’s sometimes. he’s consistent.

  38. Will

    Agree: Fitz is not funny on his own podcast but good on the Carolla show

  39. Eric

    Libertarian Presidential Candidate Gary Johnson would be a perfect guest for Adam

  40. JoFo

    Three words: Billy Dee Williams.

  41. Caveman73

    LMFAO! One of the best podcast you’ve done in awhile Ace. Not knocking the others of course but damn what away to kick the year into gear….. “Jerking off facing the grizzly bear….”

  42. Caveman73

    Correction… Kodiak bear….. My bad!

  43. Bryan

    U sorry losers like fitz dog because u have no choice.. the dude is on every two weeks on this podcast.

    • Caveman73

      Project much skippy?

  44. Travis

    Allison should take vicodin more often. She was funny this podcast.

    • Gompers

      I agree wholeheartedly

  45. Moe

    Marcy Playground getting a little play on the pod, oh yea *sniff*

  46. Robby Robbinston
    Robby Robbinston01-04-2012

    LAPD. Calling back “To see how the movie ended” LMFAO

  47. DPAT

    I thought when Fitzdog was the guest that we were finally going to get the ” Why Kevin Smith is such a Douchbag” story that we had been teased a few weeks ago– I can’t imagine Aceman would ever back away from a classic Carolla style Douche Nozzle hose job on such a deserving Prick. Notice I never said fat because I don’t think his weight contributes to why I have always thought of him as an over rated, over hyped hack.Just his Shitty, Shitty Movies. The” HAMMER “out classed anything he ever did.

  48. Robby Robbinston
    Robby Robbinston01-04-2012

    Yeah the grizzly discussion was hilarious

  49. Stan

    Good episode!

    I am starting to have concerns about one thing though, there is talk of a phone screener and seemingly encouraging more callers. Adam, please don’t take too many callers unless it’s a focused thing, like a weekly show with Dr. Bruce or an occasional Loveline Reunion with Dr. Drew. There is nothing worse and grinds the show to a halt than some douche bag caller trying to do schtick with Adam. 99% of listeners aren’t callers and we have no interest in hearing these people try to think the phone call is going to be their big break.

  50. Amanda

    Albuquerque (NM, US) implemented a 311 system, so the 911 operators answer 311 (city info) calls when they aren’t doing emergency calls. They are always super polite. Felt the need to give credit to people who deserve it.

  51. Matt

    Fitz is always funny when he’s on. I guess he’s one these guests that half the audience either loves or hates. Gilbert Gottfried was like that on Howard Stern back in the day, but I always loved him too.

  52. jw

    This was a great, great episode/ Absolutely hilarious. I will never forget the bear.

  53. MuddyG

    I came here just to say Bill Withers is definitely black. I see that others hace already pointed that out, but what the heck, I was here already.

    Love the podcast, Aceman.

  54. donewithidiots

    I can understand the frustration with the PD but when a town goes to shit like L.A. has, that’s what happens. Services get worse. It would be eye opening for Adam to do a drive along with the cops some time. But only if he got a little taste of danger during the tour of duty. There’s a lot of good cops out there doing a hard job. I’ve had Ohio State Highway patrol actually raise his voice at me in front of my family when I was explaining my speed. Had a dispatcher at the local level tell me to call another police agency for reporting a DUI I was driving behind as I heard a football game in the background. But I’ve also had a lot more FAVORABLE run ins.

  55. toma

    You know why the onstar guys showed up and the 911 team did not? One is a private company and the other is government.

  56. Martin

    Still no comments for The Great Dameshek podcast ? That’s lot of moderating…..

  57. Randy

    As already noted Bill Withers is black. The fact that Greg compares him to Randy Newman is about the only thing that he said that actually made me laugh. Comparing Withers to Newman is like comparing Fitzsimmons to another Bill — Cosby, a true comic genius. Let’s hear Adam and Mr. Cosby in a conversation.

  58. BIRDY

    Fitzsimmons is a pretty funny dude, but DAMN is he a friggin CREEP! I stopped listening to his podcast because the creep factor was just through the roof! and if he had a “porn star” on it was just unlistenable. Hell, if he had ANY female on it was pretty damn gross.

  59. L'huomo d'Ace
    L'huomo d'Ace01-28-2012

    Refreshing! And educational! The valuable wildlife survival advice on how to stop a Zodiak might even save lifes!
    Not since Dana Gould’s gem of wisdom about gorilla ettiquette have I laughed as hard: “if attacked by a gorilla, try to act bored…”

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