Episodes

Giovanni’s Superfan Sidebar 12/19/2012 – Chris D’Elia Live From the Hollywood Improv

A real time blog where Superfan Giovanni does recap and commentary on the show as it happens and opines on all things ACS

Recorded 12-14-2012 – Release Date 12-19-2012

http://adamcarolla.com/chris-delia-live-from-the-hollywood-improv/

Adam is opening the show with Chris already on stage, Adam is getting a chemotherapy update from Bald Bryan, Chris just realized this was serious and has a funny one liner.

Adam just interrupted Bryan to explain why he stopped giving blood; Alison has a funny one liner about his blood type. Chris seems stunned out how hardline Adam is about no longer donating blood.

Alison has a funny question that leads to a hilarious tangent from Adam about mixing his bodily fluids, the quotes are so good, Chris remarks how gross it is, it is and it’s wonderful!

Bryan is further updating the gang on his condition; Adam is sharing an anecdote from earlier when he was peeing next to Bryan.

Adam is telling Chris how much he resembled Whitney, his costar on “Whitney” and joking about what their kids would look like.

Chris has shifted the topic to Whitney’s shiny face; they’re all now on a tangent about grooming and becoming dependent on various products, mainly Chap Stick.

Adam has a funny riff about what Chris would do to get more chaps tick and BB has a funny twist that solves both problems.

 

Audience Questions

1st question from Trevor, he wants to know Adam’s take on the entertainer most likely to be elected to political office one day. Adam thinks Tom Selleck and Alison agrees because of his “competent jaw”.

Adam is now joking about his own possible political campaign, his plans go as far as “district selectmen” and now Adam is riffing on high school elections, Chris actually ran for treasures in school, whoa!

Adam is riffing on the lack of pirate activity immediately turning him off to the role of treasurer, Chris now telling the gang about his awesome campaign posters.

Chris is now telling Adam about losing the election to an Asian kid, Adam is now riffing on how there is no shame in that. Adam is now riffing on kids running unopposed.

Adam is now telling an anecdote about a girl who was running and pulled a move that Adam insists her dad must have told her to try; now they’re riffing on the death of the dog in the posters Chris made.

 

2nd question from Mike, They’re riffing on how he relocated from San Diego to North Hollywood, Mike wants to know Adam’s height preference in women.

Adam is now giving an example, he’s citing an old loveline call, he’s confusing the call from a blind woman with a deaf person, and Chris just called him out on the phone call part of it, good stuff.

Adam is furthering his point by explaining the sliding scale of “little people” and Chris feels it’s a more derogatory term; Adam is now giving his take on “server” and “little person” as terms.

Adam is now telling the gang about shooting a sitcom with “Pamela Adlon”, Adam is now riffing on height. Adam is now telling people to “own their thing” he’s got a great Armenian eyebrow analogy.

 

3rd question from Kelly, Adam is taking a hit off of her “Better Man” and Chris is commenting on her reaction. Kelly collects classic porn and Adam wants to know what her cats think of this, great back and forth between Adam and Chris.

Alison has an amazing one liner in there; Chris is now grilling Kelly about the cats she must own. Kelly’s favorite porn is “Sex Boat” and now Adam is grilling her on the name of the pirate who hijacks the sex boat, hilarious replies from Adam, love the shouting!

Adam is now telling Kelly about the connection between “Sex Boat” and “Taboo II”, Chris demands to know what’s going on as they play some “Taboo II” music. Adam is now giving a great sports analogy about being a fan.

Chis is giving hilarious reaction after hilarious reaction and now Adam is filling him in on the details of “Sex Boat” including the sleeping arrangements.

Adam is now telling the audience and the gang about the “Randy West” song set to the tune of “The Boxer” that they all sung while on a man show era weekend getaway.

Chris is now further quizzing Adam on the “Cleopatra” porn, he’s got a great accusatory question that Adam follows up with all-time great quote about what he can or cannot beat off to, GOLD!

 

Totally Topical TiVo Trivia

Chris wants to know why Bryan always wins and Alison has a funny reply.

Adam is telling Chris the rules of the game and why he goes by Pete, Alison wants to know if she’s at a disservice with this game because of her generic cable company DVR.

Adam is doing a live read.

 

On to the game, Bryan jumps in with the first point, Adam has a hilarious reaction and he’s admonishing Dawson for always taking Bryan in the close calls, Dawson’s reply has an amazing delivery, very funny!

Chris is jumping in right off the bat, good stuff! Adam gets in there as “Pete” and gets his first point of the game, Dawson is being generous and Chris is once again thrown for a loop, awesome!

Adam is now jumping in again; he’s got his 2nd point of the game. Bryan is lightning quick and gets his 2nd point, Alison has a question about the theme of tonight’s game and Adam has a great reply.

Adam is the first to ring in, but he gets the wrong movie in a series, Chris tried for the sequel and BB takes the lead with the 3rd entry.

The game is now BB 3 and Pete 2, Alison jumps in and gets her first point. BB is next and now has 4 points. Chris is now on the board with 1 point, nice work! He’s got a funny reply about only knowing the answer if the name of the movie is in the description, hilarious!

Shocking BB wins the game, this time with another very impressive answer; Chris is even impressed by it and now knows firsthand why BB always wins.

Chris is joining Adam for a Mangrate live read; he’s doing great and bringing the comedy in regards to the weight of the box and Kelly who must own secret cats.

Adam has a funny riff on cats coming to Kelly’s apartment confused that she doesn’t own them, Chris is chiming in, this is hilarious and it’s technically a commercial.

 

Alison’s News, Her top story is on the Pope joining twitter and his first tweet. Adam wants to know what’s going on with the pope in 2012; Chris has some funny observations on a picture of the pope tweeting.

Alison has a funny Gwen Stefani observation, Chris is jumping in and now Adam is explaining how it’s good that Lady Gaga has more twitter followers.

Alison is now getting Adam’s take on when officials appear on popular venues; Adam doesn’t want the president on MTV and doesn’t want someone like him in charge.

 

Alison’s 2nd story is an update on the IKEA monkey from Toronto, Chris wasn’t aware of the story and Adam has a funny observation about the mini meatballs being full size if you’re a tiny monkey.

Chris has another amazing reaction and now Alison has set up a clip from the news about the story, Adam is doing some commentary on the clip.

Adam and Chris agree that people shouldn’t have monkeys and Adam is making a point if you do that you shouldn’t explain in detail the connection you have with it.

Adam is explaining that dogs don’t care about; Chris is agreeing and sharing an hilarious anecdote about his dogs shitting on his carpet while staring him down, Adam is joining in.

Adam has a hilarious quote about women who know about earthquakes; Chris has one of the all-time funniest reactions in the history of the podcast, whoa!

BB just set up an earthquake themed stripper DJ bit; someone through change on the stage, Adam asks Alison if she wants to pick that up, Chris has another killer reaction!

Alison is further explaining why this part of the news story stuck her; Adam is explaining how people graft their feelings on to every other creature on the planet.

Adam is now telling Chris about his diabetic dog Molly and how she doesn’t even know when he’s mad.

Adam is now telling the gang how if he was diabetic and his parents would have let him die, hilarious joke about hiring a drifter to take care of Molly.

Alison just brought it back to Chris and his little dogs; he’s telling the gang how much he loves them and how he got them anti bark collars, he’s going in depth on what’s happened since he bought the collars.

Adam is now going off on dog walkers, he thinks it’s below unemployment and he’s got a funny twist on what the dog walker does in your house when they’re done. Chris jumps in and adds to it, Adam is now explaining how dog walker is a “right now” job and now he’s doing an improv with Chris.

 

Alison’s 3rd story is on Ben Affleck being named entertainer of the year, Adam has a funny take on not feeling bad for Ben before this, and Chris has an interesting take on Argo.

Adam just busted out a Ben Vereen reference and now a funny PSA for black people, BB has the “More you know” drop ready.

Adam is now telling the gang about having some face time with “the 2nd Ben” but was blown out of the conversation by Bill Simmons, now Adam is calling for all Boston sports fans to shut up about it, he’s doing his nonstop Rams talk analogy.

Chris is setting up a story but at the first stumble BB lays in some condescending drops and now he refuses to tell his awesome story, Adam laments Bryan doing that and is now moving on.

 

Alison’s 4th story is on a bald man who has developed a business where he rents out space on his bald head to advertisers. Adam is telling the gang about a cut man in boxing who was doing this years ago, Chris actually knows what Adam is talking about; Adam is stunned and is now moving forward.

Adam is now going off on how there is nothing more disappointing than the translation of what the coaches are saying while in the corner during a boxing match.

Now Adam and the gang are trying to figure out the prime real estate on BB’s scalp, Adam dropped his Mangria.

Alison’s 5th story is on “Ask Men” naming Jennifer Lawrence the most desirable woman of this year, Adam has a funny “ass man” riff up top with Alison.

The gang is riffing on Kim Kardashian plummeting in the rankings on “Ask Men”; Adam has a funny idea that explains what happened.

Adam is on a funny riff about photos of black men from the 1970’s and how it was the era when black guys had to be doing stuff in photos, Chris loves it!

Adam is going off on the rest of the list, he hates the picks as per usual, Emma Stone comes up on the list and Adam doesn’t seem to recall her, the gang just fired up a photo of them on the tonight show together, hilarious!

BB just set up the 3rd of the Richard Banks and Mike Lynch Christmas songs, this one is dedicated to Bryan.

Adam is doing a live read and wrapping the show.

image