26 Sep Giovanni’s Superfan Sidebar 09/26/2013 – Brad Williams, Live From The Ventura Harbor Comedy Club
A real time blog where Superfan Giovanni does recap and commentary on the show as it happens and opines on all things ACS
Guest – Brad Williams, Live From The Ventura Harbor Comedy Club
Recorded 09-24-2013 – Release Date 09-26-2013
Production Number #1172
Adam has some teasers for later in the show and BB is playing MY choice(as well as his) for #TopDrop, Adam’s amazing “Pussy Lips!” delivery in the voice of a character that might be found on an episode of “Scared Straight”.
Adam is welcoming Brad back to the show for his 5th appearance and they’re discussing his love of golf with some amazing one liners from both guys, great height comedy but without any clichéd material.
Adam is now protesting the term “Breeders” being used to describe him and announcing his intention to start an anti-defamation campaign surrounding the term, great phone book joke from Aceman!
They’re back to the golf and are now getting into Alison’s take on architects, Adam is standing by her with his own sink peeing behavior and how he is often left hanging as the odd man out when it’s brought up.
Brad is now asking Adam about peeing in the sink, he has a hilarious quick reaction and then realization and now Adam is explaining why we must do this, Adam is telling all people to piss in their own yard twice a year, he’s saying it’s homeownership at its best.
“They can pry my miniature cock from my cold dead hands” – Adam quoting Chuck Heston (kind of).
Adam is now calling out the audience for some Copenhagen chunks along the rim of the urinal, Adam is explaining his sink peeing doesn’t make him a hypocrite.
Adam is bringing up the drinking fountain story from last year when he was visiting his dad in the hospital, Brad is asking him follow up questions and he’s fleshing it out.
Blah Blah Blog
1st Blog Choices are: John Mellencamp, Neil Young and Willie Nelson
Adam is going off about farming in response to the blog and Alison is offering her take, Adam is now singing John Mellencamp and mocking it without knowing John is one of the blog choices, wow!
Adam is now riffing about putting out a collection plate to get Willie a new guitar and Adam has a new nickname for him “The Grey Pubed Stranger” in response to Brad bringing up his previous one, Adam is joking about Willie’s trailer and BB has a solid joke.
2nd Blog Choices are: Oliver Stone, Roger Waters and Michael Moore
Adam is stopping Dawson mid read to rant about how much he hates the person who wrote this blog, Adam is now explaining what would have happened had the bombs not been dropped on Japan in WWII.
Adam is going off on his theory about guys like Ed Asner, the “know you don’t get it, I love this country but…” arguments.
Alison has a killer one liner that also moves things forward before voting begins.
3rd Blog Choices are: Sheryl Crow, Ted Danson and Sir Paul McCartney
Adam has a great response to the blog that everyone seems to enjoy and Alison once again gets the funniest joke in.
Adam is now bringing up seeing Sir Paul on JKL, he’s joking about older guys who like to rock the “Grecian formula” and Alison has a great point about how the youthful hair can possibly spook strangers who approach you from behind.
“Hey Paul, Let Your Hair Be” – Adam to Sir Paul, now Adam just topped that with a joke about Paul and Linda’s vegetarian lifestyle, he’s now explaining the logic behind the comment which takes some of the shock out of it.
Adam is going off on genes and using Linda’s bean curd consumption and constant tambourine playing to explain that it doesn’t matter what you do or don’t do health wise, it’s all in the genes.
They’re now digging into Brad’s joke about being compassionate by dating a man with one testicle, Adam is now bringing up Lance Armstrong’s true advantage over even the PED’s, the single ball.
Brad is joking about Adam’s comment about riding a bike, Alison has a great comment after Brad’s funny reaction and now Adam is joking about selling Brad one of his kid’s old bikes in 6 months, comedy gold!
Adam is sharing the story of how he acquired his first unicycle, now he’s describing his advertising of what a horrible parent his mom was when he was riding the unicycle around the block with a cast on his arm.
Adam is explaining how his unicycle was stolen by the guy he let borrow it, he’s calling the meeting of both moms the “clash of horrible parenting” that lead to the last unicycle Adam ever saw as a kid.
Adam is commenting on how he’s only paid back in free unicycles as an adult in response to that story and Brad is riffing about his own “Rosebud” and Adam is playing along nicely, good stuff!
Alison is now asking Adam what he thinks actually happened to the unicycle and He’s finally giving his take on what truly happened and filling her in on his early demise, the Boyd Brothers.
4th Blog Choices Are: Annie Lennox, Oprah Winfrey and Sigourney Weaver
Adam is joking about how he would like to travel to Africa and not be surprised by what he saw when he landed.
Adam is now ranting about “The Eurhythmics” and they’re all weighing in on the votes.
5th Blog Choices Are: Mark Ruffalo, Daryl Hannah and Ted Danson
Adam is now riffing about following cars running on biodiesel and how it makes one hungry for French fries, great comedy about getting Brad to travel up the exhaust pipe.
Adam is now telling Alison and the gang about the time they interviewed Daryl while she was staked out in a tree protesting back on the KLSX version of the ACS, she guested in 2006 and 2008.
Alison’s News
The opening is played with her scary clown noise, gold!
Alison has a personal story and Adam is now commenting on the sea of faces, and calling one woman a “Bouillon cube of black” saying she’s worth 18 white chicks.
Adam is now riffing about Bouillon as a name for a black woman, even builian cube, now Le bouillon.
The woman is now objecting loudly and Alison is trying to move things along with Adam, now Adam is mocking some other white people in the crowd to even the scales for the drunk heckler.
“I will give you half your money back if you shut the fuck up!” – Adam Carolla
Adam is telling everyone to relax and this woman is grinding the show to a halt, Brad is now jumping in as the professional comedian and she might be about to exit the show if she can’t quiet down and behave.
Now her drunken boyfriend is not “relaxed” and Adam is giving strict instructions, he doesn’t want none of the Aceman though, dude punches as hard as Chuck Liddell.
Adam is trying to get things to move ahead and now the woman is still shouting off mic while her boyfriend is causing problems as everyone applauds and they are exited out of the building.
Adam is joking about telling them what car Brad drove to get them vandalize that instead of his British racing green Jaguar.
Alison is now telling her personal story and it’s very brave of them not to edit that out of the podcast, that proves Adam’s point and he’s now doing the “Dude chill, dude maintain” maneuver that the guys buddy could have attempted had he been present.
They’re praising the wonderful staff for wrapping that up and now Alison is sharing a story she was told from her brother regarding a summer he spent living as a sustainable farmer, Alison had baby corn in her salad and Adam has a killer joke.
Alison is telling them all the details about the farm, how they had to kill their ducks because they were at war with the Chickens.
The woman has made a return cameo off mic and Adam is rolling with it, joking about her titties possibly popping out while she’s wrestled to the ground by cops.
BB just suggested that Mike Dawson get a raise as he just ran after the woman to get some follow up audio, nice work, very Adam Carolla Loveline security guard of him.
Alison is asking them what they think about the story, the duck slaughter done with an ax by her brother and she’s now bring up the description he shared with her.
Adam is now asking her about her brother and his Judaism, turns out he knew he was Jewish unlike Alison growing up, and now Adam is redirecting things with a killer Matt Damon joke.
Adam is joking about chicken wire solving this problem, Brad struggles to get in a “ax/aks?” joke and the black drunk lady is now back in the audience.
Adam has a killer opening line for Brad to use to threaten women, this is comedy gold!
Adam is now joking about how he can’t get to his car without getting his eyeballs assaulted by a press on fingernail.
Adam has a great joke about Brad’s “piece of toast sized tombstone” and people taking a jewelers loop to read the text, hilarious shoebox and bic topper, this is off the charts brutally hilarious, Adam can’t stop this roll!
Her Top story is on Al Franken asking Apple about their new fingerprint technology in the latest iPhone, Adam is on his social security number rant explaining how that supersedes all surveillance on earth.
Alison is explaining that people are now using their penis to unlock their phone and Adam has heard about this already, he’s got a great uncut joke/question and Alison has a great point about tumescence, literally cock blocking yourself from internet porn.
Adam is explaining how he was fingerprinted for the program required to work with the kids at the YMCA for his sons basketball team, he’s explaining that you now need all of your fingers on both hands.
Adam is joking about his plan to coach basketball in order to fulfill some creepy “Happiness” style plans.
2nd Story is on the Volkswagen bus going out of production, Alison said Brazil was the only place that still manufactures them and Adam is commenting on their prominence in Mexico.
Adam misses the VW van in the states and now Brad has them riffing about municipal bumper stickers and Adam is riffing about bejeweled license plate frames.
Alison is calling the license plate the cars butthole and everyone agrees.
Brad has a dragon shirt analogy to go along with Adam’s question and point about the role of boyfriends to tell their gals to remove these flashy crappy frames.
Adam is explaining why we all need a buddy from the old neighborhood, he’s citing the time he tried to emulate his construction buddy Kelly’s fashion style with a purchase of cowboy boots and he’s sharing Ray’s reaction, the most important part of the story.
Adam is commenting on an audience member who seems to have left mid body odor comedy, Adam is now working him into the live read.
3rd Story is on Oprah’s recent admission over a nervous breakdown and Brad and Adam are joking about the woman from the audience and how all this began back during “Blah Blah Blog”.
Dawson is on mic agreeing to Adam’s new rules for the game and he’s joking about her hairstyle.
Adam is now joking about taking a load off of Oprah’s shoulders, simply by getting someone else on the cover of her magazine.
Alison is wrapping the news, Adam is doing the plugs and wrapping the show.