Episodes

Giovanni’s Superfan Sidebar 09/03/2013 – Adam, Alison, and Bald Bryan

A real time blog where Superfan Giovanni does recap and commentary on the show as it happens and opines on all things ACS

Guest – Adam, Alison, and Bald Bryan

Recorded 09-02-2013 – Release Date 09-03-2013

Production Number #1155

Show Page
Adam is opening the show with a somewhat mellow tone and BB has a new #TopDrop regarding Alison’s non Marilyn Manson like skin tone.

Adam is now telling the gang about spending some time with his family over the holiday and he’s going in depth on a trip to “Loews” saying it’s slightly above the average home depot.

Adam was taking his daughter to pick out fixtures and items for her new room remodeling and he’s now riffing about kids not understanding the value of money and Alison has a point about age.

 

Adam is now riffing about Sonny and explaining how he combated the boy’s logic regarding age and athletic performance, Adam has a killer descriptor describing what he’s become.

BB wants to know when Sonny will be able to physically best the Aceman.

Adam is back to his story; he’s telling the gang about shopping for light fixtures and the various types on display, somehow Natalia found the most expensive one available.

 

Adam is now declaring that 7 year old girls are akin to largemouth bass regarding shiny junk, he’s now explaining how he was approached by a “Loews” employee asking him if he was going to use their branded card for his checkout.

Adam is now riffing about how he would like to have a trench coat lined with “Loews” cards and he’s got some killer one liners describing it, topped off with a choice self-satisfied sniff.

Adam is now explaining he was baited by the 10% savings due to his houseful of purchases, BB is amazed and Adam is explaining the differences between this and a Ralph clubs card with herpetic metaphors.

 

Alison wants to know if Adam would prefer oral or genital herpes, he’s now explaining how as an actor he has different requirements.

Adam is explaining how insurance for productions involve multitudes of discussions regarding oral herpes before you start filming.

Alison is now helping Adam resume the story where he left off, mid credit card sign up.

 

Adam pulled his “move” regarding employment and income, in the same vein of his Las Vegas TSA incident “I’m a carpenter, I guess…”

Adam didn’t qualify for the card and he’s now explaining his reaction to the secrecy of the reasoning regarding his rejection.

Adam has a funny address based one liner and Alison has a solid reaction.

 

Adam is now explaining her 18 second window to reply after he gave her an income adjustment of 10x his original claim.

Adam is now explaining his past experiences with various credit cards and he’s still pondering why he was offered a card if it was such a difficult item to acquire.

 

Adam is now bringing up how his mom requested his last book Not Taco Bell Material with what sounds like a new level of interest and almost immediate need for it.

Adam is now contrasting her interest with her inability to buy a copy; he’s using BB’s parents as an example of how normal parents might react to their son publishing a book.

Adam mentioned how he used the information about him switching publishing companies to dance around giving his mom a copy of it.

 

Adam is getting into his “people do what they want to do” theory that is ascribed to most junkies and their 200$ a day habits being satiated despite no employment or income.

Alison is now chiming in with a fine point about long drives to see a love interest and Adam is using the boner logic and taking it to a new level to make his point about desire, need and intent.

 

Adam is telling the gang about his kids going to see the “One Direction” documentary and is sharing his lamentation over his son’s excitement for the band and the movie.

Adam is now bringing up the classic sight of a dog being secured to a front post or bike rack outside of a store waiting for its owner, Adam is now commenting on the supreme narcissism that has resulted in that no longer happening.

Adam is now brining up how his kids will grow up never experiencing that sight/joy of petting a strange dog outside of a store.

 

Q and Ace

Adam is setting up this special “Shitty Jobs” Labor Day edition and he’s now describing the spider and web he found between his feet, near the pedals of his car.

Adam is now pondering what he should do aside from torching the house for insurance money and he’s now telling them about the upside down praying mantis monitoring his door jam.

Adam is now taking it back to the Tupperware removal process and he’s taking it back to earlier tonight when he was leaving his house to head for the show.

 

Adam is explaining his idea to add the Mantis to his car and he’s describing the escalation of insect aggression required to put an end to this.

 

1st Caller Jared, he’s telling them about his all-time worst job in Palm Springs, spraying insecticide into sewer entrances.

Adam is now going off on the heat livening up insects right when open windows are required to cool down the house.

Adam is now telling the gang about a story he heard from one of the “Queens of the Stone Age” regarding his past gig installing insulation, as told to him on their 2002 or 2003 Loveline appearance, possibly the same episode Drew predicted/prayed for Adam to have twins

 

Adam is now talking about his former poor guy trips to Palm Springs where they would sleep outdoors on patio furniture.

Adam is now bringing up the fight they got into; it was Adam, Ray, Chris and Snake in his dad’s OJ style Bronco.

Snake used the heater to get everyone to behave in the back of the truck.

 

Adam is now using construction job sites to explain the hierarchy of money and responsibility; he’s got a nice dig at architects for A-Rose.

2nd Caller John, he’s bringing up Adam’s “I wonder if any escorts drive a ford escort” he actually knows a girl who was arrested while driving one.

He’s bringing up his Celebrity and Malibu riffs of the same vein.

John worked at an animal hospital when he was 14 and he’s describing the horrors in great detail.

 

Adam is now sharing his vinegar bath system and hose to clean the dogs in lieu of John’s method and Alison is asking if she’s the only one to be surprised by this information.

Adam is now riffing on the idea of people relying on the fact that dogs can’t talk, very true.

Adam is bringing up the expensive auto wrecks that are put online for commoners to balk at; he’s got a funny variant name for the service.

 

Adam is now bringing up the large cutouts and farmer billboards he passes every year on the way to Carmel Valley when heading to Laguna Seca, he’s amazed kids don’t paintball these billboards.

Adam is bringing up the time Ray fired a spear gun into their buddy’s wall and joking about what he would’ve done with a paintball gun.

Adam is now listing off some of Ray’s all-time greatest hits and Alison has a great point about what Adam would still look like if Ray had a paintball gun.

 

3rd Caller Jason, he’s confirming the billboards he passes every day that Adam was just describing; Adam is now observing the “Great Magnet” connection between the paintball riff and the billboards that this very caller passes every day.

Adam is now riffing a Kevin Nealon/SNL style subliminal “Bruce Springsteen” idea to work in when describing this situation and ones like it to Lynette in order to keep her attention, hilarious!

Adam is now sharing the time he was visiting a friend and joked about a picture of a woman and a man and actually guessed the name of the guy standing next to the Janis Joplin look alike, the ‘Bobby McGee” story.

 

They’re riffing on the billboards and Alison has a funny observation.

Jason is telling them about his worst job, he had to share an office with a chain smoking female machinist.

Adam is now on a tangent about the flexibility of female sexuality and how dude’s don’t share the same type of range in the bedroom and Adam says that cock is too big of a commitment.

 

Adam is telling them about Natalia showing him Robin Thicke’s “Sex Therapy” album and how it’s her new thing, Adam is lamenting this move while telling Alison it’s probably better than her interest in Rihanna and her inappropriate messages.

Adam is telling them about his time spent listening to “One Direction” and how he was able to pick out the similarities in the song to a tune performed by Katy Perry.

Adam is describing himself as a prisoner counting cracks in the ceiling to pass the time and how he actually went online and discovered the connection between both recording “Artists”.

 

They’re back from break and Adam is bringing up Tommy “Gun” Morrison in light of his recent demise and he’s touching on his relation to John Wayne.

BB is bringing up his role in Rocky V and Adam is bringing up how his skin color took precedent over his nearly flawless fight record, 49 and 3.

Adam is now bringing up Donovan Razor Ruddick and how his mule kick punches couldn’t dissuade Tyson from jumping back in the ring for a rematch.

 

Adam is now bringing up the Tommy Morrison/Razor Ruddick fight where Tommy was able to drop him while completely out of gas; Adam is now describing the footage of the infamous knockout.

They’re discussing his controversial Aids status/diagnosis and Adam is explaining how he hates it when the greats don’t get their due.

Adam is taking it in-depth to the fight game of the era in which Tommy was boxing and how there is at least a solid documentary somewhere in this story.

 

Hooray For Baldywood

BB saw “In A World…” the directorial vehicle from Lake Bell the fantastic ACS, ARIYNBF and Carcast guest.

He’s going in depth on the subtlety of the story and Alison is now commenting on the plot with some additional details.

Alison is telling the gang about when Lake guested on her podcast and how the relationship between her and her father might have some real world inspiration.

 

BB loved the movie and he’s saying it’s the opposite of the Hollywood lies regarding big budget crap fests and he’s really singing the praises for this film.

Adam is saying they’ll have to get her back to discuss the film and he loves her for their mutual car obsessions and BB is praising the work for Dmitri Martin in the film as well.

Solid A for this film from the Bald one.

 

Alison’s News

Her top story is on Diana Nyad accomplishing her goal of swimming to Cuba without a shark cage; Alison has an interesting observation about her boastful twitter bio and ponders if she wrote it herself.

Adam is now joking about the idea of people living in Cuba fleeing to America and what it means about their country.

Adam is using the Berlin wall to make a point about how you can tell a good government/place to live by how eager people are to escape, Adam gets the distance between the USA and Cuba confirmed for him.

 

 

Adam is bringing up the idea of swimming with a shark cage and how jellyfish and Man o’ war are often worse.

Adam wants to know what’s up with sharks, which is it, are they a constant threat or can we swim to Cuba and not have a problem.

Adam is now joking about the constant refrain of people defending the sharks and how it’s not comforting to be “tasted” and spit out, great body image comedy from the Aceman with a solid Nazi jogger/Debby Dutson joke to close it.

 

They’re discussing the details of her swim and Adam is riffing about how he wouldn’t want any part of that duty.

 

2nd Story is on the cast for the upcoming “Fifty Shades of Grey” movie and Adam is launching into why Dr. Drew hates the book so much, partly because it glorifies and abuse victim acting out, almost encouraging others to harm their own lives.

Alison is explaining why she hated the book, it was poorly written and she’s now reading the cast list.

 

3rd Story is on the skyscraper in London that is shaped in a way it’s magnifying sunlight to destroy car interiors and Adam is calling for a giant ant hill to be destroyed by it.

They’re now all observing the building and Adam is sharing how he was looking at his mom’s car and it’s sun blasted interior, he’s commenting on how she’ll probably make it to her grave sans carport.

Adam is now explaining that he has the same relationship with sharks and the sun.

 

They’re now mocking the name of the building and the nickname, Adam is saying it looks like what buildings look like when you’re on mushrooms.

Alison is sick of people saying “a love letter to” in regards to various cities, she’s giving and example and Adam is saying it’s the replacement for “On Steroids” which Alison observes replaced “On Acid”.

 

4th Story is regarding an article on Adam’s new book “President Me” from HarperCollins imprint “It Books” and Adam is now telling them why he switched publishers.

Adam is now saying he loves Suzanne from his previous publishing company and how they were unable to come up with an offer which resulted in the publishing agent getting a competing offer and their reaction to the news.

Adam is bringing up the previous 2nd audiobook incident and how it tarnished their relationship but he was still willing to work with them and did.

 

Adam is going in depth on what took place with them and their super insulting 5k dollar offer for Adam to record it himself with his professional studio and professional engineers who know his voice better than some 3rd party studio technician.

Adam is bringing up how people try to “teach him a lesson” and he’s citing the Stone Stanley banning from the Man Show set and how they producers were able to get paid to gallivant around the globe while jimmy, Adam and Daniel did all the work.

Adam is calling the industry backwards and bringing up their irresponsible move a week later where they agreed to Adam’s plan, Adam is wondering why he’s forced to have a ho down with morons wherever he goes.

 

Adam is on his “what do we live to, 175? 180?” riff while lamenting having to deal with this people, he’s now onto the 3rd step of the deal and how it all fell apart.

Adam is explaining his reasonable request for low pay for the talent and time of his staff and free studio time of a minimum cost of 800 dollars a day, I’d wager Adam’s is actually worth more than that.

Dawson is now on mic and claiming it was a “fuck you” move and has a great point about passive income, Adam and Alison have some great lines while mocking the hardline the publisher took.

 

Adam is explaining his role in switching publishers and how despite his past dealings he was still willing to do business with them.

BB is calling it standard business practice to take out offers and Adam is now walking them through the rest of the steps that led to his departure.

The contact at the publisher was in “fuck you mode” instead of “Fix it mode” despite his bargaining position.

 

Adam wants to know how they were “devastated” and Alison says they were trying to make him feel badly about it, he’s saying it’s impossible and he’s now saying he’s not talking shit before they come back and claim that.

BB has a great therapy one liner; though he calls it anger management even though it’s not that and if it was there might not be a show.

Adam just confirmed Mike Lynch’s involvement in the 3rd book and Alison is wrapping the news.

 

Adam is asking how crazy that story was and now BB is interrupting to talk about his experiences with his book and publisher.

Adam is now explaining why they’re wasn’t a Seattle and Portland signing for the 2nd book, which bumped many fans who are still curious as to why it never happened.

The publisher wouldn’t even cover Adam’s southwest airplane tickets to try and sell them an extra 1k copies.

Adam is explaining why when he has ideas he’s given the “not so fast hot shot” reply to shut him down.

Adam is now taking it back to the “you said we were splitting it down the middle” reply and Alison agrees it’s very disheartening and Adam is now taking it to his “did you have any idea adults would be this stupid” idea.

 

Adam is doing a live read, giving the plugs and wrapping the show.

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