Giovanni’s Superfan Sidebar 08/21/2013 – Adam Perry Lang

A real time blog where Superfan Giovanni does recap and commentary on the show as it happens and opines on all things ACS

Guest Adam Perry Lang

Recorded 08-19-2013 – Release Date 08-20-2013

Production Number #1146

Show Page

Adam is opening the show with kind words for Alison and BB has a nice #TopDrop from Eddie Ift regarding saggy balls.

Adam has a tease for Adam Perry Lang returning to the show for his 2nd visit after a 4 year absence, Adam is explaining that Mike August is now at the studio due to the prospect of free food.

They’re now playing the Mike August “Constant Grazing” parody song.


Adam is telling the gang about approaching the studio to tape O’Reilly and how he ran into a fan listening to the show walking past him.

Adam is pointing out his resistance to flashy cars and how he would be fine in a new Toyota Camry, BB jumps into shit on his point regarding the “borrowed” Jaguar Adam is using for the next year.

Adam is telling the gang about borrowing his wife’s friends new bare bones Honda with complete “econo-cab” interior.


Adam is saying her heard “I should know I’m Debbie Dootson” from a nearby vehicle, he’s now off on a tangent about the regional commercials advertising truck driving jobs and how they’ve evolved to these commercials now being themed around “do not leave the couch but let’s get some bread in your hand, someone may have fucked you and you don’t know it”.

Adam is now listing the various commercials that advertised possible careers for people sitting around watching daytime TV.

Adam is now explaining the Dootson School of trucking commercial that he was referencing in the clip he heard from the nearby motorist.


Adam had a brief exchange with the nearby driver and had to give an “it’s not my car!” closing remark/shout and he’s unsure why he was so bumped by it.

Bryan is now listing some possible reason, opposite of point shitting.

Adam is now saying they’ve now found a sadder person than the person propelling themselves backwards with their feet in a wheelchair, “how did you get her, your fucking lower half is a puppet” – Adam


Adam is now describing the new sad entry, he’s referencing the guy riding a bike trying to steer another bike while on his own, and Adam is saying that everyone should just hit that guy.

Adam is now setting up the new one, a guy on bicycle while pushing a shopping cart full of junk.

They’re now playing the classic Dootson School of Trucking commercial that Adam was referencing.


They’re all on the topic of production values and voice over, Adam is taking it to the turn in culture, and how it went from trying to get you a job to trying to get you a lawsuit.

Adam has a serious battery issue he has to get to and BB’s wife Christie is on hold to share a travel nightmare.

Superfan GIO had his own experience with a shoeless traveler on the way to Adam and Jay Mohr at the Wiltern, rubbing his gross feet all of the divider wall doing like a high kick move.


Adam is doing a dollar shave club live read, Adam, BB, Christie, Alison and Daniel are all hooked on the Dollar Shave Club razors.

Christie is now on the line from New Jersey, she’s telling them about her flight to Newark coupled with a mom and daughter combo sitting next to her.

Christie is now describing the stripping and contortions the passenger next to her entered into upon sitting down.


Christie is now getting to the salad eating portion of her flight, this sounds pretty terrible and Christie has a great “Mr. Peepers” reference to describe her eating style.

The daughter was resting her head in her mom’s lap, Christie and Adam are both mystified by their lack of boundaries.

Christie is now commenting on the woman trying to lie about ordering food and how she had to climb over her and her kid along with her pile of clothes to get to the lavatory.


Adam want to know if she is an out of control narcissist or has a psychiatric problem, Adam is now ranting about this behavior is not only bad for the people around them but for the people too.

BB is agreeing about society keeping people in line, they’re on an “American Idol” example and now Adam is describing his late nights of judging and how all he does is judge.

BB and Adam are now riffing about the foot fetish community and how much of a boon this recent trend of barefoot narcissists is for them.


Adam is now playing a Fitzsimmons-esque foot fan passenger sitting next to Alison the unsuspecting woman getting perved on, this is a great improv scene.

Hilarious cockroach reference, Adam is really amplifying the creep factor and Alison has a nice acting “A little ménage a toe” – Adam

Adam is now trying to smell Alison’s foot, this is taking a hilarious hygiene twist, they’re wrapping the scene and Alison has a great “Greg Fitzsimmons” reference.


BB is taking it back to Christie, she told the flight attendant that the woman next to her was crazy and the staff wasn’t happy with her as she tried to return to her snacks.

Adam is now pitching a “left behind” scenario for this woman and the people like her, Adam is now telling BB his wife is going clubbing as she wraps her delightful call.

Adam is now ranting about the switched on lamps and how you can burn yourself by trying to get the twist knob near the bulb, he’s describing the hotel rooms that often have confusing light switches on their lamps.


Adam is now describing his cordless mouse losing contact with his computer and how scary that was, BB is joining him with some funny comments and a nice Terminator reference and drop work.

Adam never thought he would feel that helpless, he was using rechargeable batteries and has noticed they don’t seem to hold a charge.

Adam then went downstairs to the battery drawer, he’s taking it back to his construction site to reference “We got a Dime, holding up a Dollar” to describe his battery nightmare.


Adam is now reading the tally of batteries in his drawer, there were nineteen 9 volts the most exotic of all the batteries.

He’s calling the C the 2nd most exotic and found 49 brand new C’s, 40 D batteries were found and BB has a telling “lot of flashlights” comment.

They’re all discussing their battery habits, Alison is a little quieter …

Adam is now getting some feedback and he’s consulting Dawson while explaining it happens when everyone checks their phone, that’s because different carriers you different radios that interfere with the recording.


Adam is now asking the questions of BB about why they have so many batteries of the kind they don’t need.

Adam is teasing the arrival of Adam Perry Length with an in-depth discussion of his BBQ expertise.


Adam is back from break with Adam Perry Lang making his 2nd appearance on the show, Adam is bringing up the time they all went to Montana to go fly fishing and how much he enjoyed the trip.

Adam P.L. is confirming the trip while explaining he how he flew in his own cuts of meat, he’s now telling Adam about aging meat and how the flavor is missing from supermarket meat selections.

Alison has nice question and Adam P.L. is giving a great explanation with a follow up telling Adam about his 365 day aging process, Adam is joking about having to wait a year at the restaurant, hilarious!


Adam is asking Adam P.L. about Kobe beef sold in the United States vs. Japan, he’s explaining how the flavors develop due to the genetics of the cows in the region.

Adam is telling the gang about Jimmy Kimmel “discovering” Adam P.L. and how he brought them into the fold of their gang of friends, Adam is joking about Tommy the girls’ volleyball coach that Jimmy knows from his youth.

Adam is commenting on how Babydoll only eats his steak extremely well done and how it disgusts Kimmel, Adam P.L. describes Babydoll as “these people” and BB has nice reaction.


Adam is quizzing Adam P.L. about the limits for cooking steaks, he is suggesting medium rare to rare and medium or medium well for a heavily marbled steak.

Adam is bringing up episode of #88 of the Adam Carolla Podcast with Jimmy Pardo and Joel McHale, they’re briefly touching on it and not getting into the hard feelings that resulted after the taping.

Adam is telling Adam P.L. he noticed the lack of BBQ sauce and is noting how it wasn’t provided, he’s quizzing Adam P.L. about the rubs he uses and how he tops his steaks with olive oil.


Adam P.L. is commenting on Adam’s speech at Kimmel’s wedding and how beautiful it was, Adam is asking if he agrees with the sentiment of Jimmy bringing people together.

Adam is now commenting on how without Jimmy they wouldn’t know each other, Alison is bringing up a topic from her show regarding Chris Laxamana wanting to befriend his AAA guy.

Adam is listing all the examples of how each person’s various talents and interests benefit each other, Adam was discussing forging knives with Adam P.L. during their bicycle trip on Kimmel’s bachelor party in Vancouver.


Alison is asking Adam P.L. how he got into grilling and all his various food related interests, he’s got a brief but very impassioned explanation.

Adam is now interrupting to say he’s torn, he wants him to stay on the show but he also wants to eat BBQ, Adam is bringing up how he might cut him loose to cook so they can wrap up relatively early.

Adam is calling it a win, win, win and giving a nice plug for Adam Perry Lang’s latest book.


Alison’s News

Alison is now commenting on the wrist corsages she still has in-between heavy books, in reply to Adam’s wonderful Legal Zoom live read.

Adam is now taking it back to the ultrasound for Lynette’s pregnancy and his reaction to “you want the disc right?” and why he wasn’t sure if he wanted it.

Adam isn’t sure he would want to see a fetus version of himself and he’s got a crazy Charles Manson topper.


Adam countered the ultrasound technician’s “how could it hurt” with a “How Could it help?” that left her dumbfounded.

They’re all remarking on the junk you keep for sentimental value, Adam got a great point about digging through it to write a book and BB agrees.


1st Story is on a new study that shows drinking in moderation doesn’t actually impact pregnancy like the long held medical advice.

Adam is now commenting on the parental nature of medical advice and how the field of medicine is not supposed to be gauging where people are at before sharing medical advice.

Adam is sharing how everyone over 40 would have fetal alcohol syndrome if this truly was as big of an issue as it was made out to be.


Adam is citing the medical headlines in the news that shift from month to month, Drew would say there is no such thing as a “medical headline” and the media doesn’t understand how to report on medical breakthroughs or trends.


2nd Story is on the suicide of Gina Allemand

Both Adam and Alison are perplexed how someone so young and frankly pretty could choose to hang herself.

They’re both commenting on how typically women don’t use violent means for ending their own lives, Alison has a nice comment about the details she wants revealed as she’s a “sicko”.

Adam is explaining that he would find a competent certified henchman to help him arrange his hanging, hilarious kick molly in the face comedy, BB has a killer on liner as Adam apologizing, gold!


Adam is now joking about executioners in the gallows rocking the sleeveless top with a leather hood, comedy gold.

Adam is explaining how his boner would kick in just to humiliate him and make people think it was an auto erotic accident.

Adam is breaking down the suicidal tells given off by men and women and how they contrast, great callback to the foot fetishist improv from the top of the show.


Adam is now pondering if women are more prone to immediate reaction, he’s citing women hitting people for stepping on their foot in contrast to a man saying “hey you stepped on my foot”.

Adam is pondering if women are far more impulsive and exist in the present, which also makes them more empathic, he’s wondering if both go hand in hand.

Alison is now sharing some details and closing the story.


3rd Story is on the first settlement in the Penn State case, they don’t know the amount but they do know it must be large if the Lawyer is happy.

Adam is bringing up the California teacher who served up “Semen cookies” to his students, Adam is breaking down how they only offered 400k to the victims’ families in comparison to the Penn State settlements.

Adam is getting into the possible racial discrimination when it comes to access to attorneys and settlements.


4th Story is on a judge approving the force feeding of California prison inmates

Adam is now saying that detail of the forced feeding sounds like the worst gig, he’s citing his trip to his mother in law Helen’s house, during the infamous encounter with the cops and her ninja skills.

Adam is getting into the “here’s what’s going to happen” conversations with the completely sane and insane, he’s always right.


Adam is breaking down the confrontation between Lynette, her mother and the cops, Adam is joking about being preoccupied with a bag of bugles while it was all going on.

Adam is now saying if he was in prison he would have the same conversation with the guys in the cellblock, give them the Granola bar alternative option.

Alison is now explaining the details of the case and why the prisoners have chosen to go without eating, Adam is suggesting a simple sugar solution.


Adam is bringing up California on the precipice of releasing 10k inmates due to overcrowding, he’s bringing up the millions and billions wasted on abandoned plans and bogus ideas for prosperity.

Adam is saying that California and L.A. get by like a hot blonde never cracking her books while contrasting Minnesota as the heavy set gal with a pretty face who never stops sucking cock.

Adam is on an extended riff as California describing itself and its highlights while leaving out the bad side.


Adam wants to know why they pay the most in gas and taxes and how it never ends up going back into the system, he’s making a lot of points and it would be hard for anyone to argue with him.

Alison wants to know if it’s all media hype or if California has the tits to back it up, BB has a telling “What do you mean we” which is probably explained by his former body type and also clues us into the parody song aimed at Mike Lynch he contributed to.

Adam is using his buddy Ray with his perfect physique who only drinks and smokes, as Alison puts it “ripped and unhealthy”.


Adam is now suggesting we let the prisoners die of starvation to eliminate the overcrowding, Alison has a great legal point that makes this idea seem not so harsh.

Adam is saying he would provide “hanging pipes/belts” in each prisoner’s cell, giving them the option to end their life if they so choose.

Alison is remarking on the incongruous idea of preventing inmates from suicide while not having concern for them, this sounds akin to the right to life movement and their take on children once they’re born.

Adam is now commenting on trying to explain the idea of keeping a person on death row from committing suicide to someone from the future, similar to his “explain this to an alien” idea.


5th Story is on the feud between Kim Kardashian and Katie Couric.

Alison is reading the details behind the story, including the tweets from Kim Kardashian in reply regarding a baby gift.

Adam is now calling for the Kardashian’s to reel it in a bit in the attitude department, he’s citing their lack of accomplishments.

Adam is now talking about her ass being a tractor beam for the brothers.


Adam is defending Kim’s work ethic and comparing it to her television producer Ryan Seacrest and his work ethic and how he rose above local DJ to his new media empire.

Adam is explaining that somewhere along the way we traded talent for hard work and education for grit, he’s complimenting the Kardashian’s for doing the same.

BB is now arguing that work ethic can be classified as talent in its own way, it doesn’t all have to be artistic ability.