11 Aug Giovanni’s Superfan Sidebar 08/08/2014 – Greg Koch, Live from The American Comedy Co. in San Diego
A real time blog where Superfan Giovanni does recap and commentary on the show as it happens and opines on all things ACS
Guest – Greg Koch, Live from The American Comedy Co. in San Diego
Recorded 08-06-2014 – Release Date 08-08-2014
Production Number #1391
Adam is opening show #2 of the night, this time with BB on stage and Greg Koch from Stone Brewing Co. and he’s got a funny Jewish one liner for Alison.
BB plays the “I’m Drunk” #TopDrop and Adam admits he’s had a few beers, now BB is bringing up Greg’s status as beer royalty and Adam is making various blowjob innuendos.
Adam is now asking him how many barrels of beer they might “move” this year and he says they like to think of it as carefully crafting and reveals the giant number.
He says 100 million servings of beer this year, Adam is asking them about opening a brewery in Europe and Adam jokes about it being like Pontiac opening a plant on top of the Ferrari factory, he then clarifies which is Pontiac.
Adam is sharing his love for their IPA and bringing up Saint Archer and the stolen beer, averaged 1 case per staff member.
Adam says that he ended up getting more free beer than was stolen from him by his wretched awful employees, Adam jokes that he’s now got a flood of beer and has a great “stolen Christmas gifts from a retarded person” analogy.
Adam is now joking about him talking shit about his competitors, Greg has a flowery chains of oppression point about freeing people from the stigma of beer.
Adam is now reading the math and joking about Greg’s estimate for beer sold this year, Adam is now bitching about the price is right and how you can lose by going over, Adam says it should be like fucking darts.
Adam has a killer analogy about you missing the bullseye and the other player throwing their dart into the ground.
Adam is bringing up how he used watch that show and how they would have things like grandfather clocks that nobody ever bought for you to estimate the cost.
Adam says that Target brought “Layaway” back and is now explaining the concept of it.
Adam is now ranting about powdered milk, he says if you have to buy it you can’t afford kids and should’ve pulled out and shot some real milk on someone’s titties, wow!
Adam is now bringing up a family he knew that would mix powdered milk with real milk, to cut it and stretch the length it lasted.
Adam wants to know why powdered milk even exists, Adam says when he’s in charge his deputies will be standing near the carnation powdered milk, hilarious orphanage exception.
Alison is sharing her junk food she ate during the break between shows and how she’s now afraid to smile as their might be food in her teeth, Adam jokes that only a little bit of a condom is on her incisor.
Adam is now bringing up how he witnessed his daughter perched in front of the 70 inch TV set this AM watching some shit kids TV, she was working her iPhone watching something else in front of her face, and she’s bored with “Hi Def.” and jokes about cat gut wires in old timey electronics.
Adam is now predicting what his daughter will be doing at 13, she’ll be watching a movie at the theater and staring at a postage stamp size picture of Selena Gomez.
Adam is now asking Greg about his history with beer and he’s telling them about his first Anchor Steam beer and Adam is now waking him through his origins in brewing.
Adam is sharing how he was told it’s far more expensive to start a beer company that wine, he’s now riffing about “Pete Coors” always looking like he’s just run a marathon and BB is joining him for the riff.
Adam and BB are further riffing about it and Adam is trying to get Greg to really spell things out for him and stop using these euphemisms and broad flowery terms, he wants the details.
Adam is joking about pissing out some Greg’s beer and has an excellent “you craft beer, I craft words” one liner and BB reminds him to sniff.
Adam is now riffing about ancient Egyptians goofing on further generations by drawing a bunch of funky shit that doesn’t exist.
Adam is now having Greg walk him through the history of brewing and beer, telling Adam that the first grain was used for brewing and he jokes about everything in life being about catch a buzz and fucking.
Adam is now riffing about prohibition and how people (alcoholics) must have felt witnessing some shitty fed taking afire axe to a barrel of whisky and riffs about going into the sewer to lick up the spilled booze.
BB is now saying that for his money San Diego is the best place for brewing and Adam is calling him out for saying the same thing about Seattle and Portland.
Adam is now sharing his theory about nothing being accomplished near the ocean, hilarious riff.
Adam is asking Greg how they were able to break out of the preconceptions and Adam says “it just is because it is” like the grunge scene from Seattle.
Adam is now asking Greg about Stone and their policy on advertising and Adam is now waxing poetic on word of mouth advertising.
Q and Ace
1st Question From Jordan, Adam is interrupting to riff about her and says “If you are 22 and have a pussy you are at least a b list celebrity because you are under 25 and possess a pussy” – Adam
Adam is now on a “cock and balls, ladies” riff reply and Adam is riffing about her pussy failing the 9th grade and being held back from her age.
Adam is now adding Morgan Fairchild to the list of hot blondes that get famous for their beauty and jokes that everyone would fuck Jordan over Morgan, Alison has a hilarious one liner.
“What’s that tampon’s got your tongue?” – Adam
Jordan is asking her question and Adam riffs about Asian dudes cocks being in college when they were only 13 and Adam is responding to the notion of her and her bf being friends for the first 6 years before of their relationship before dating.
He wants to move in and she’s hesitant as she’s young and Adam has a hilarious “it’s so fucking sad, it’s doomed, it’s never going work out” reply as BB has a choice sound bed.
BB fires up the sound bed again for after Jordan says it’s purely and economic decision on his part, Adam has a killer one liner about the movie “The Notebook” (has he seen that movie!?) and now Adam is joking about A-Cups and the euphemisms that aren’t used to make an analogy about “efficiency” apartments and he’s telling them about living off of Franklin near the UCB with his stripper girlfriend.
Adam is now telling them about the wedding in Hawaii, he called it a stag wedding and Alison has a great reaction.
“And my friend Michelle, she’s a chick, unless she’s a weird French dude” – Adam
Adam is telling them about the gecko T-Shirt he got his stripper ex and how she moved out into his grandparents’ house after leaving him, he jokes about her next boyfriend who drove a motorcycle and how she moved in with sister and Alison asks about his parents take on her.
Adam shares the rare detail of their reconciliation that lasted 3 months before it ended for good, Adam is now giving advice about breakups, a time travelling version of you who can tell you not to take things so seriously.
2nd Question Lex, he’s adjusting to California and the laws in the state, he wants Adam’s take on the statewide ban on plastic bags.
Adam is bringing up a photo of the beach he was tweeted from the 1950’s and is sharing an anecdote of Matt Fondiler having to take his dog to a specific beach, Adam is explaining how he likes to sit and watch beach activities with “good looking labs” and the joy people get from watching other people play with their dogs, hilarious Rocky one liner.
“Over here we’ve deiced we are going to cure everything by stopping everything” – Adam on the United States and our rules compared to the Middle East.
Adam brings up his Pelican and Goat, Gilligan and Stewie, Adam is saying that all these rules at the beach and he’s now ranting and making some killer points about all beaches being dog beaches, he’s now telling the CHP and city employees they work for us, fuck you it’s our beach motherfucker.
Alison brings him back to the topic and he connects it all together, Adam is now asking Greg about the beer that wakes him up at night with cold beer sweats and coincidentally brings up one of their varieties of beer.
Adam is sharing his take on Corona vs. Dos Equis and other Mexican beer varieties and Adam is telling Greg about his tour of the Coors plant in Colorado.
BB is now asking Greg about home brewers and Adam is talking about “sours” with his AV guy, AV Ed and Adam is now joking about Egyptian monks making beer.
“I’ve found that the none sour lovers are very bitter” – Adam with some punny comedy.
3rd Question From Eric, Adam is marveling on how nice it must be to be from Vermont and BB asks who your team is if you’re from there and Adam is now asking if you must take stop at a “waystation” of sorts to avoid getting the bends from switching from between such climates and Adam is now riffing about a cow uprising.
Adam is asking where they were as he lost track of time mocking Vermont, Eric wants to know what Adam today would’ve told a young Adam years ago, Adam cites Internet porn and gets to some practical advice about the misery he must endure before making it to 30.
Adam is now getting deep with it and says he would add the winners to every Super bowl so he could do sports gambling, has even seen Back to the Future 2?
Eric wants to know what 18yr old Adam would tell current day Adam and he’s talking about how he was so down on himself and his youthful physique and decent looks, he would’ve fucked more?
Adam is now wrapping up.
Adam asks the guys after the news theme plays if they also went back and noticed that they looked a lot better when younger, Alison has a great summation about looking the best when you feel the worst.
Alison’s News
Alison is now citing the Classic Loveline episode she was listening to on the drive into San Diego and she’s citing a caller from that episode #98 – Neve Campbell and Michael Goorjian 02/13/1996 Classic Loveline
Holy Shit she’s not caught up, the dilemma of the show, not enough people can keep up with 3 per week, hence why it is now being downgraded to only 2, 15.7 years were just added back on to the release schedule, I had it down from 48.7 to 11.4, now were back up around 26 years until all of the episodes are released, yikes!
Alison is getting into the specifics of the simultaneous orgasm caller and her partner, Adam is sharing his take on women faking orgasm and he’s got some hilarious “Pussy crunching” accounting comments.
Adam is now riffing about the “Oprah episode with the woman who had her face torn off by the “monkey” (ape) and he’s riffing about simulated wood having knotholes and jokes about that being something to fuck when you’re drunk.
BB calls back Adam’s sports gambling and time travel and Adam jokes about that being the real world example he needs right now.
Alison is asking how much men care about women having orgasms and he’s got a nice women’s haircut analogy and a great “Fantastic Sam’s” riff.
1st Story is on Victoria Secret’snew “what’s sexy” list and people react to Jessica Simpson and Adam asks what’s up.
Adam says he wouldn’t want to date Taylor Swift, BB mocks him and Adam riffs about BB not being a celebrity and now riffs her song “Not a Girthy Cock” and how he doesn’t need that kind of shit out there.
Adam observes he did the Tonight Show with Jessica Simpson and Emma Stone and his run of doing the show with chicks who were too young to be aware of his fame, Adam jokes about killing himself to avoid this getting even worse.
Greg is now taking it back to 18yr old him and now Adam is telling himself to fuck an unborn Emma Stone, Adam jokes about fucking the unborn and how it’s not brought up, the under 0 victims, BB jokes about Adam losing the crowd.
Adam is reacting to Zoey Deschanel and her show “The New Girl” and he’s mocking quirky that’s for women, Men want hot and Alison brings up how BB and Adam agree her sister is hotter, Alison says that Zoey is hot and is pretending to be quirky hence the reactions from people about her put on quirkiness.
Adam is bringing up his “I’m hot because I don’t know it” riff with is son.
Adam is now reacting to Jennifer Lawrence and how she doesn’t do anything to his cock and her acting sabbatical and Alison brings up the Orbitz gum promo lady, Adam jokes about Greg beating off to the St. Pauli’s girl and Alison asks about the other beer iconography women.
Adam is joking about Mexican Liquor stores “you walk in and your hit over the head with tits and soccer balls” and BB has a killer one liner about San Diego.
Adam references Senna and his former gal “Maria da Graça Xuxa Meneghel” and Adam jokes about Gary giving him names he can’t pronounce and tells him to get them more beer.
2nd Story Is on a face plant device patent for urinals and now Adam is telling them about “The Love Grommet” his sexual aid device for long penises and short vaginas.
“Why would you fuck without a love grommet” – Adam
Adam is now riffing about sales techniques, magic spatulas and bacon grease sunscreen, Alison is helping him riff this funny joke mocking broken logic sales techniques.
Alison is now reading the description about this device, Adam may have actually invented this one too and he’s forgetting.
Adam is joking about vibrator ads on women’s shoulders instead of shoved up against their crotch.
Adam is mocking the idea of a sober guy leaning forward like that, hilarious!
BB has an “I’d probably poke him” reply and now Adam is calling Greg a weird dude for refusing to poke a stranger and Adam is now riffing about his bathroom etiquette.
3rd Story Is on the upcoming sale of the Never land Ranch, Adam is mocking the song “The Man in the Mirror” and how it was about the time where Michael decided to add the palsy-esque noises he started making.
Adam is now mocking the idea of him looking in the mirror and judging himself and his odd behavior, Alison is having some killer reactions and now BB is playing the song and Adam is mocking the noises live on stage, gold!
“Whether he’s physically looking in the mirror and seeing bizarre plastic surgery going on or he sees a 6yr old kid behind him crying” – Adam on MJ
Adam has alternative song title “Beating off in the gutter.”
Adam is caving to the crowd’s demand for a live read, he’s joking about being arrested on the beach for having “naughty thoughts” and is doing a live read for E-voice.
Adam thanks Greg and is wrapping up the show, this is one for the Ace Awards 2014, and it’s a contender for best live show of the year.