Giovanni’s Superfan Sidebar 07/04/2014 – Brad Williams
Guest – Brad Williams
Recorded 07-03-2014 – Release Date 07-04-2014
Production Number #1360
Adam is opening the show with a nice #TopDrop from Jay Mohr mocking Rotten Tomatoes, Adam praises Jay’s performance on air and Alison comments on the kindred losing spirit she found in Jay Mohr.
Adam teases a conversation with Matt the Porcelain Punisher, about punishing some porcelain too!
Adam is teasing the involvement of Kevin Costner for his Patent Trolls defense fund benefit show this September.
Adam is telling them about getting rough cut of his movies on thumb drives and the upload/download process.
Adam is unclear, does he mean download or upload from a remote location or the time to copy the file to a flash drive?
On the right USB 3.0 port on modern PC’s and MAC’s can process data at 640mbps, even if you were filling the largest flash drive made it wouldn’t take long at all, unless they’re using my archive flash drives I sent Adam from 2009 that are USB 2.0, they wouldn’t do that though right? Yikes!
Adam is now explaining that someone else has to “click the mouse” in order for him to obtain the thumb drive and use it, because he doesn’t know how to click the right thing, someone fucking teach him how easy this shit is!
Adam is explaining that he had to decide between Matt Fondiler and Andrew to see who was going to be running to the shop on the 4th.
Alison has a killer “Heli-copter” joke mocking Matt, Adam is joking about him winning a toilet scrub brush award and Alison has a killer follow up.
Matt is now on mic explaining that he’s just going to parent’s house to spend the night for a casual pool hang out the next day.
Adam is explaining that his rage comes from envy with Matt, he’s explaining how exotic it sounds and that “let’s take a moped to Mars” seems more feasible than him saying he was going to go hang out at his dad’s house for a pool day.
Alison calls back to Adam’s stripper gf living with his grandparents, Adam is now breaking down how the parents flopped with their parents after their divorce.
Adam is mocking his parents lack of assets at age 41 when his dad and mother were separated, he’s joking about his dad sleeping in the den of his mom’s parent’s house.
Matt is bragging about his free dinner on his dad’s dime and hot tub sessions with his mom and his girl and booze.
Adam has a great “is Lucious cut or uncut” one liner mocking Adam.
Alison gets Adam to admit it’s truly like a vacation and Alison is quizzing him about falling into his teenage role.
Adam jokes about Matt’s dad only getting tired of him after he’s logged too many miles in his parent’s shoes.
Adam is now bringing up the Jewish element of family, he’s using Alison’s parents raising her as a goy to blame them for why they don’t have the same relationship that Matt has with his non goy folks.
Matt is now saying he’s the catalyst to change in many people’s lives, Adam is now dismissing him and saying he’s hell-bent on having that relationship with his kids, the good Fondiler Family dynamic.
Adam is asking Alison about starting up her fertility campaign, she’s saying that she’s following Adam’s advice about rushing to the experts immediately, skip ahead to the stuff that works.
“Didn’t bathe my innards in sperm just enough” – Alison about her possible mistakes in their attempts to get pregnant.
Alison is telling them about her next procedure and the photo of the brochure for the producer they’re going to do on her.
Adam is now mocking the “someone riding a mountain bike photo” on various brochures.
Adam is now sharing an anecdote from his grandma, an old Jewish joke and he’s now riffing about a “big broken pussy” hanging in a window with a thermometer in its mouth.
Adam is now theorizing that this procedure must not just be a fertility intervention, Adam is now calling Alison that she’s like a man who gets breast cancer, and she’s a male cancer titty.
Adam is asking her about Daniel having to produce his sample “on sight” and how lucky women are that men are jack off ninjas, citing how hard it would be for a woman to do the equivalent.
Adam is going in depth on the strip mall aesthetic and how a woman would struggle with this, Adam is riffing about the need for wine, bath time and to be swept away.
Adam is joking about guys beating off in the tolerance museum and even near the simulated ovens, holy shit!
Adam is now going further in depth and BB fully agrees, he’s saying guys could walk the entire holocaust museum and finish upon exiting the tour, they’re joking about Alison’s former “White Power” dating prospect.
Adam is joking about carrying his own porn like a flask and pulling it out when he had to produce his sample, he went right for the middle zone, he didn’t want anyone getting impressed with his lack of time nor a “fortnight” he says “All I want is nothing” and BB helps him clarify.
Adam is now bringing up the Sadaam Hussein Cabinet meetings and how nobody there wanted to stand out, you just want to sit there and back to your two stroke car home.
Adam is having Alison further describe her process and now Adam has the bizarre realization for a whole generation of kids, the product of masturbation and dad was thinking of another woman while the sample was produced.
Adam gets and assist from Alison with the masturbation point, she’s mocking irony of now sounding like one of those people who she was parodying with “What to expect if I was expecting” and now Adam is telling them about the original 3 embryos.
BB is using Sonny’s drop of “what are you talking about” to simulate triplets, Adam says it would be a breeze to have 3 of him.
Adam is saying he was blaming Dr. Drew as he has triplets, Adam is sharing his great magnet take on being punished for the years mocking Dr. Drew, he shares they were offered to “reduce” and then goes into his reaction to that.
Adam is saying it’s a weird grey area where you signed up for kids not an abortion, he say the 3rd one sloughed off and went away, they never had to make that decision.
Adam says they got very, very luck in that department.
Alison is wondering why so many embryos are implanted, she’s sharing how Mike August was pre-med and told her that they multiply.
Adam and BB correct that info, kind of. Now Adam is riffing about August’s only expertise being in Cajun food and is now referencing their time spent Louisiana.
Adam is now doing a Legal Zoom live read, soup to nuts.
Q and Ace
1st Caller Brian, Adam is complimenting him on spelling his name like a fucking human being and tells BB that he’s so fucking lucky that Cranston spells his name with they, he’s got a great delivery on the anger he feels when he’s clenching his fists thinking about BB’s name then how it dissipates when he thinks of Cranston.
Is he going to punch him? He’ll kill him! Alison is now jumping in and they’re back to “Brian with an I.” he works for the publisher of his latest book “harper Collins it says up there” and he’s now sharing a tidbit about his name being spelled Corolla in the system for Harper Collins, but Fondiler’s name is spelled perfectly.
Adam is now lamenting that common misspelling of his name, Adam is now bringing up the Toyota model car with his name spelled two different ways on the same tiny die cast metal.
Adam is saying he now accepts this as a part of life and he says it must take extra work to get things this wrong, Adam is now calling for Matt Fondiler back in the booth.
Adam is getting an update on the move of the offices for the publisher, Adam is sharing his new quasi insulting one and cites his email to Kevin Costner.
Adam is sharing the vague details of the passionate rousing email sent by Kevin Costner, Matt replied “your guess is as good as mine” in reply and Adam said the proper response would be “your guess is a lot better than my guess” according to Matt, Alison has a hilarious reaction to it.
This was inspired by caller Brian bringing up “Don’t do your best, do my best.”
2nd Caller Abraham, he wants to know about all of the remakes and rehashes in cinema and if Adam thinks they’ll ever go a different route.
Adam is letting BB weigh in and now saying that while TV is groundbreaking and books are all about the best you can do, he says movies are more international and broader in nature just by their financial demands alone.
Alison references Jules Dash, Adam jokes about it some more.
Adam uses “In a world” and then pardons his pun, wow!
Adam is citing “Land of the Lost” as the prime example of anything being able to be remade, Adam is saying there are people who have heard of the show and hated it and then people who have never heard of it, how do you make a movie out of that?
BB is now asking what was the last big summer movie that was totally original, he is hinting and won’t share until they guess, it’s of course “Inception” and now Adam is jumping into a live read.
Adam is doing a live read for Draft Kings, BB won again, of course!
Adam says that someone tweeted him something, he’s now getting to how flattering it is that fans listen to old Loveline, BB jumps in to say it’s a podcast now, fuck yeah BB! I love you bro!
Adam is explaining why he thinks it’s so obscure and rare someone would want to listen to an old radio show, he says that someone sent him a compilation of clips of things he said on air, it was done in vein of my other podcast “G.I.O. Get It on” the spiritual predecessor to CLL, weird it’s almost like they tried to not mention me.
Adam is now lamenting the staff at Westwood one including Drew who would never laugh at anything he said. He’s forgetting all of the fart nights where Drew lost his shit at the things his asshole said, he’s forgetting the “ballsack and Faberge egg” bit, the waffle crapper idea etc.
BB now credits Anderson for laughing but then says he would get mad at himself for laughing, Adam is bringing up the “animal skin condoms” and “Vagetarian” reply that nobody ever appreciated.
Adam is dead right, he had more non reactions to gold than anyone on earth, Adam is explaining their phone call to Jimmy Kimmel in the middle of the show to see if the liked the gag, that episode is coming up on Classic Loveline btw.
Adam is explaining that Jimmy loves puns and he’s telling them about the “Jacktine” offer to help an injured Juggie, now Adam is bringing up the Mila Kunis episode from 2002.
Adam is quoting his “like asking a Dalmatian for a gig as a fireman…” and he’s now saying he can’t think of a show that has a bigger chasm between fan and staff entertainment levels than Loveline.
Adam is explaining how Jackie would laugh at his own jokes on Stern, Alison is saying that Drew now laughs and Adam agrees.
They’re now heading to break.
They’re back from Break with Brad Williams who must be coming up on a dozen appearances now, Adam is joking about flipping a dwarf to figure out who he likes better Adam Ray or Brad.
Brad is telling them about traveling to Brazil for the World Cup, he was with Kevin of “Kevin and Bean” radio fame.
Brad was told he was going to be robbed and told to keep a fake wallet and cell phone on him, Adam is joking about how you must stop and reexamine your country when you have to warn people of such things about your own country.
Alison and Brad are adding to the riff nicely and Adam wraps it up, Adam is now asking Brad to break down the marriage between him and Kevin, Adam says he’s an interesting guy and likes to explore.
Brad says that his brother in law is on the board of Kevin’s charity and he’s now joking about how it makes you appreciate American hookers.
Brad wants to know the term for group of hookers, Alison has the best line and they all riff the possibilities.
Adam is joking about the models vs. prostitutes in Rio and Brad’s chances with the “Filet Mignon” and now Adam is joking about hipster’s adopting the look of badass bikers and women adopting the looks of prostitutes, Adam has a great thong back joke.
Brad is telling them about the prostitutes and Adam has a great “Brad Williams vs. Ralphie May” prostitute rate joke, like vans at a car wash, his old go to comparison.
Adam is asking him how he got rolled and Brad is not clear on the street slang, Alison has a nice back up for Ace.
Brad is telling them about the stadium in the jungle he attended, Adam is joking about the closer you are to the equator prohibiting innovation and fine manufacturing.
You get parades and hookers, you need a sweet spot away from the equator but not too cold.
Adam is having Brad tell them about the exact mugging, he had the fakes on him and handed that to the guy, his equivalent to being robbed after years of martial arts training.
Adam is now asking about the value of a used cellphone, Brad is sharing how he was laughing and loaded up the fake phone with pictures of his cock, nothing but dwarf cock picks.
Adam is telling the people who manufacture wallets we don’t need the fake credit card and ID cards in the slots, we can figure it out, BB is riffing with him nicely.
Adam is asking them about the amount of stadiums they went to and the most exciting game, Brad is citing all the grown men he saw crying openly for their team.
Adam sounds pained, Brad interrupts and says the best part is that the fans come dressed as the biggest stereotype of their country.
Adam says even the mugging sounds magical, Adam wants to know if he would have stayed an extra day assuming he left because the USA got knocked out, he left the day before because he had gigs.
Brad is telling them about a flash flood and being trapped for 3hours, he’s being very honest about the nature of Brazil, along with the clashing class discrepancies.
Adam says he’s travelled with Kevin many times and finds him a very easy guy to travel with, but very boring to eat with.
Adam says local cuisine and food is half of the appeal of travelling, Brad is telling them about whip cream in liquid nitrogen for this 7 course meal he ate with Kevin.
Brad ate a hot towel, thinking it was some kind of food alchemy, Adam is telling them about Cousin Sal eating the rock salt patty that the seafood was sitting on.
BB is telling them about the pink Himalayan sea salt he ate that was intended for decoration, people eat that though, it’s healthier.
Adam is now doing a live read for “Fresh Books” and jokes about the fake Brazilian cell phone “with the pictures on there” and now he’s setting up the news.
1st Story Is on the 22 month old boy who died, Alison mixes up month and years, they mock her for a bit, nothing mean.
Alison is now explainnig the two life insurance policies on his son and the charges against him of wanting a “childless life” based on his web searches along with his sexting, including a shot of his erection sent to a 16yr old girl.
Adam knows that his guy knows computers bases on his job, why would he not wipe things or destroy them.
Brad says “never google the crime you’re about to commit” and now Alison says it sounds like has a personality disorder, Adam has a killer “I disagree” and is sharing the “did you says too much” along with the line “no malicious intent” reply from the father/killer.
Alison is telling them about the surveillance footage of him trying to fake his sadness, Adam asks isn’t it pretty easy to get rid of a white boy in the adoption market.
Adam says “how do you give away the kid”, despite the demand, what do you do as the parents.
BB brings up the friends and family element that prevents them from using that option, Alison has a great foster care alternative question.
Adam is now riffing as the fireman watching the family drive off after dropping off their kid, he’s lightly touching on the “certain stigma” of a child vanishing from a family unit.
Adam is now mocking the attempts from sane people to get into the heads of people who do crazy things, Alison is saying that she is shocked by this obvious “Nancy Grace Bukake” of evidence.
Brad is now asking if the guy came back to the car, Adam says the frustrating part of this whole thing will require the testimony of the wife, he’s now bringing up the hillside strangler and his partner.
Adam says that one person gets away and they only put one person away, Adam says you need to arrest both of them and do the cop work.
Adam says fry him and put her away forever, why do we need her to testify, Adam is forgetting that a wife can’t be compelled to testify against her own husband, it sound like Alison knows but isn’t bothering to correct it out of keeping the show flowing
Alison is now reading the gruesome details and approximations of the head and car seat, Adam is now asking for the Hillside strangler details.
BB has an attempt to shit on Adam’s point or question about the computers, by asking if he was on his work computer.
Adam is now bringing up the murderer out of Canada and his wife, the serial killer couple that was featured on HBO’s autopsy along with the gruesome footage from their VHS tapes, including them raping and murdering her sister and then encasing her head in concrete.
Adam is now referencing that episode of HBO autopsy, he’s trying to figure it out, Adam keeps saying he looks like a member of Duran Duran.
“Anytime there’s snow on the ground and white folks around there’s going to be some serial killing” – Adam
Adam is getting an update from Gary about the wife’s involvement, raping and murdering too.
Adam is now saying that they then say “Well what can we do” Adam is saying we didn’t land here and have the laws of some overlord, we can change them and Alison is asking if it’s “Double Jeopardy” much like we have here in the states.
Adam is now saying that when you kidnap and keep people alive in a drug stupor then chop them up, it’s a certain shade of awful, he’s joking about Brad fitting in a Sunny D bottle and Gary not fitting in a barrel.
Adam is now asking for something uplifting after Brad is clearly starting to not like the bummer topics, I love hearing Adam talk about true crime.
2nd Story Is on the 35th birthday of the Walkman cassette player, Alison says good think Monica Mehta wasn’t there to shit on it.
Adam has a great reaction and Alison is reading the stats about the Walkman hitting the market on July 1st 1979 and Adam is saying it feels like the black man has always been on the vanguard, he’s citing Beats headphones and forgetting the time Ice-T pitched MP3 players to him on Loveline in 1999, confirming this theory.
Adam is joking about the guy from the “Hills Have Eyes” trying to be a real life serial killer, great “Nooooooo” replies as Adam keeps trying to get someone into his van.
They’re now commenting on the looks of the killer and Brad is bringing up the guy who got his mug shot distributed on social media, the Jeremy Meeks photo.
Adam is now saying that would 5 of these chicks be alive if she dropped the dime on her husband, now they’re talking about Jeremy Meeks.
Alison says that according to his mother he is turning his life around, Alison quotes Tyra Banks based on his look in the picture.
Adam is joking about him getting caught up in the school to prison pipeline and how that tattoos do carry baggage in society, that’s a fact.
You get a tattoo to send a message, especially facial and neck tattoos.
Adam is joking with Alison about his proposed anus tattoos, Brad shares his own version.
Alison is wrapping up the news, they’re now all commenting on Alison’s theory about serial killers all being attractive, Adam is drawing a contrast between Ted Bundy and Richard Ramirez, hilarious “get them to write him a term paper” one liner.
They’re now commenting on young Ted Kaczynski and Adam is proposing a serial killer fund raising hunk calendar, he says we can lie and say it’s a fireman calendar and trick women into buying them.
Alison is asking about black serial killers they’re talking about DC sniper case, Adam says he wasn’t Denzel Washington but he wasn’t far off.
Brad is now joking about black people taking over serial killing, the tiger woods of serial killing – Adam
Adam is now joking with BB about all of the pre- Jackie Robinson baseball records, Adam is joking about rhea guy’s name not being Allan Mohamed.
Adam is sharing his “tell your kids he only targets kids who don’t clean their rooms” joke from the period, but then they interrupt him and Alison is sharing the cornucopia of results about her theory.
Adam is back to the 2002 Stern appearance where he shared the joke, Brad is now riffing and closing it out.
Adam is doing a great petflow.com live read with Brad, joking about him transporting pet food like some native with it over his head.
Adam is now joking about selling Molly’s uneaten food should she pass away, wow!
From a van outside of 7-11, holy shit this is dark!
Adam is giving out the plugs and wrapping up the show.