24 May Giovanni’s Superfan Sidebar 05/22/2015 – R. Lee Ermey
A real time blog where Superfan Giovanni does recap and commentary on the show as it happens and opines on all things ACS
Guest – R. Lee Ermey
Recorded 05-21-2015 – Release Date 05-22-2015
Production Number #1581
Adam opens the show to a funny intro from Dawson and Lynch, Adam plugs the various formats you can obtain ‘Winning’ in and explains that Sonny is only bringing two blankets and two stuffies.
Adam jokes about Sonny and his breathe right strips, Adam says that with 300,000 people there Adam will be in the car with Mario Andretti taking some solo hot laps.
They ask Adam about being in front of all of those people and Adam shares his ability to perform and deliver when necessary, they ask if Sonny can take a lap and he explains you probably need to be 18.
Adam has a funny one liner about the Make of Wish conditions required to let kids ride in these cars, Adam mocks the question about how he is as a passenger, his co-host Matt D’andria asked him on a recent Carcast and he uses his years on the road with Mike August driving like a lunatic to make his point about being comfy as a passenger in any vehicle.
Adam is telling BB about the lack of self-esteem instilled in him and he shares how he wanted to write greeting cards, he says the greatest two years of his life was when he was a writer on JKL and doing Loveline at night, he loved every minute of those years among the shadows.
Gina asks how serious Adam is about his greeting cards, she thinks it could be a money maker and he’s game.
Adam explains his son can’t be shamed and plugs an upcoming Take a Knee with Jamaal Wilkes and BB knows his career very well, they have a nice back and forth.
Adam is now praising R. Lee Ermey and his amazing work in ‘Full Metal Jacket’ and that led to the most amazing part and role in a Stanley Kubrick movie.
Adam talks about why he had Jeff Lacey in ‘The Hammer’ and jokes about the lack of a touching gay scene in the lockers, explaining he could easily act like a boxer since he does that for a living.
Adam is now doing a Smart Mouth Live Read
Gina now does the power move because of Adam
Adam is explaining the Lord of The Jungle idea and shares his latest power move of “working out in front of his minion” and describes skipping rope while going over the two amazon purchases.
Adam explains that he tells fans to tweet their recipients and presumed the fan could play the piano.
Lord of the Jungle – World Premier
Dick Banks ‘George of the Jungle” sound-alike theme song!
Adam asks if anyone else knows that song, BB claims to be familiar.
1st LOTJ Robert, he explains how his whole family pooled all of their gift money so he could buy a piano and Adam shares the story of how he pulled the same move with a childhood big-wheel.
Adam is now ranting about the “shrimp deveiner” given during one of the Carolla grab-bag Christmas exchanges.
Adam tells Robert he’s sorry to hear about his loser family, he praises his great family and explains how much each person put in.
Robert is now playing a tune just for Adam, it’s a bit rough but you can kind of hear it. ‘Cheechoo and Teemu’ from the 2006 KLSX Adam Carolla Show with Dave Dameshek.
Adam jokes about Cheechoo and Teemu, Adam promises that Dameshek will be coming on soon and promises to send Robert some show Swag.
Adam praises R Lee’s show ‘Mail Call’ and BB loves it as well.
Q and Ace
1st Caller John wants to know about dudes advertising for yogurt, Adam and BB riff about dude yogurt and joke about women’s god given ability to swallow semen, women have a genetic disposition meant for eating goo.
Adam is talking about why women like yogurt more than men, Gina is doing some fine yes and work and Adam is talking about how dudes fart.
Adam says he theorizes most women carry purses to use to fart into discretely, Adam is talking about Jamie Lee Curtis straddling the man/woman barrier and how she might be the perfect yogurt pitch person.
Adam is now sharing his “fruit in the middle” idea.
2nd Caller Paul, he wants to know about left turn signals, really?
Adam is sharing how he went around two lanes of sheep backed up a red turn arrows and slid onto the freeway, his latest power move.
Adam is sharing how he runs red lights now but cites a house with a light outside of the driveway he used to see back in 2006, so he’s been running red lights for 9+ years.
Adam says that when he gets the ticket he will fight it, he’s sharing his long held belief that his work about the danger of sitting in the middle of the streets taking the turn when it was safe.
Adam sets up an animated something, he reveals that Gary has the highest WAZE ranking and then explains someone animated a bit from Adam’s new book ‘Daddy Stop Talking’ his 4th book and NYT Best Seller, he also co-authored a book with Dr. Drew in the 90’s during Loveline.
The clip is of the story of the free Tahoe buffet and Natalia’s custom pancakes, Gina asks why Lynette would side with the kids on that menu. BB says it’s the same guy who animated a portion of his book and he hooked him up with Mike Lynch.
Adam says that she loves the kids so much and she’s Italian so eating and food is important cultural thing.
Adam is doing a live read for Castrol
They’re now heading to break.
They’re back from break with R Lee Ermey making his ACS debut, Adam plugs his new show on the Outdoor Channel.
Adam is asking him about his role with the creative direction of the show, Adam stops and takes it back to his journey, asking him how he got involved in the military.
R Lee is telling them about how he first learned of the Marines and describes the recruitment process, Adam says that many parts of this story couldn’t happen in today’s world.
Adam is commenting on the option he was given between the military and prison from the judge after he got into some juvenile delinquency.
R Lee is giving his take on how the world has changed, Adam is giving his take on discipline and young men, BB plays a clip of Sonny to mock Adam and he assures him he’ll be fine.
R Lee is giving his take on corporal punishment and explains how he was assaulted from time to time by superior officers and drill instructors, he has no qualms about it and thinks it made him stronger.
Adam is asking him how he got involved with ‘Full Metal Jacket’ and he’s telling them about running whorehouses in Vietnam and the Philippines, he even thinks legalizing prostitution in the united states will reduce rapes.
R Lee is calling for spam, bacon and other masculine marketed yogurt flavors, funny “that’s girl’s stuff” line and he’s telling Adam about his prostitutes, Adam asks if he is “pimp hand is still strong” and then explains the concept to him, this is insane!
Adam is asking R Lee about the promise he made to “Mama San” and is telling them about working on various Vietnam films as the technical advisor.
R Lee shares how he made the transition to screen talent and explains how he had nearly quit the business of technical advisor when he was contacted by Stanley Kubrick in 1985.
Adam is asking him about how he knew he was demonstrating and basically long form audition for the part in the movie, he shares how Stanley did have someone hired for the role and R Lee says he’s gotten the young actor several jobs since, how cool.
R is telling them about working under pressure and how he came up with the reach around line, Adam is asking him about the award nominations for that role.
R Lee explains he wrote everything he said in both of the Texas Chainsaw Massacre movies he did, he says he’s never seen them and horror isn’t his genre, interesting.
R Lee just summed up his entire life and career into a very company and entertaining 15 minutes.
Adam, BB and Gina are all now discussing the Academy Award Nominees/winner up against ‘Full Metal Jacket’. Some rare movies are brought up and opined on.
Adam is doing a Quick Books live read
Adam is now asking R Lee about his new show and they’ve transitioned to the minimum and Adam is asking him why he used it, R is telling them about taking out his wife’s malfunctioning Mercedes.
Adam is asking him what the weapon is made for, he says it’s made for War and BB has a perfectly times ‘the more you know’ drop.
Adam is asking R Lee how tough it is to hold that gun, R says you can watch your stream of bullets going towards the target, Adam asks if you need every 5th round to be a tracer and R says it looks good, wow.
Adam is asking R about the F-15 he flew, Adam is once again confused about the F designation vs. title and R Lee clarifies the model of aircraft.
Adam is trying to recall what Tom Cruise was flying in ‘Top Gun’ and BB fills him in, BB is now setting up a clip from ‘Se7en’ and wants R Lee’s take on what’s going in a scene, he confirms how he picked up the phone and hung it up during the scene.
Adam says god bless the editor for using that take, R. Lee says the problem with most directors is that they’re very insecure and he compliments David Fincher, it is the only laugh in the movie.
Adam says he likes the movie ‘Se7en’ and it doesn’t play on cable now permeate culture as much as he’d hope, he adds it to his ever growing list of good movies you never see.
Adam is now doing a live read for Zivity.com
Gina’s News
1st Story is on a man who stripped nude in the Charlotte Airport after becoming enraged about an overbooked flight.
Adam is commenting on the white guy heading to Jamaica and is bringing up his Bermuda shorts tan.
Adam says that in terms of cops this must be some of the worst duty, R. Lee says seeing the nude guy makes him feel a lot better about his body, pretty god.
Adam is talking about the declining level of hygiene and courtesy among today’s average airplane passenger, they’re now asking R. Lee about his wife and if she likes being married to him.
Lee says his wife has every credit card known to man, he shares how she stays attractive for him after all of these years and they’ve never had an argument.
Lee also talked about taking a shit in the LAX public toilets and getting things squirted in his butt, don’t want to forget to document that part.
Adam is now diving even further into the relationship with his Filipino wife, Adam asks him if he can name 4 of her family members, he says he could if he took the time to write them all out.
Lee shares the genuine upset among Philippinos after the last Pacquiáo fight.
2nd Story is on Elon Musk’s “Hyperloop” transportation system set to break ground in 2016, she says it will only cost 100 million.
Adam is giving his take on government waste vs, someone like Elon who needs to make money and can innovate in deliver better quality for less money.
Adam says if you’re going to poison your husband do it in the oatmeal and don’t do it all at one time and BB jokes about R. Lee’s wife trying to kill him.
Adam is suggesting unleashing Elon Musk on the various problems plaguing society including the broken school system. R Lee is telling them about the school system of his day and Adam is mocking the idea of school supplies being necessary to teach children.
Adam is mocking the notion of “food insecurities” among fat kids who need to know where their next churro is coming from.
Adam is mocking the mixed messages of “it’s never going to work out” and blames the “second hand smoke” billboards of 15 years ago that upset him so.
Adam says that these people lie and they presume they’re smarter than us, R. Lee essentially agrees and Adam says this is how he gets to play god when he’s an atheist.
3rd Story is on Conan O’Brien’s segment with Patton Oswalt where they told fans to switch over and watch Letterman.
Adam says that Jimmy had it right and he’s a true fan, R. Lee gives his honest take on Letterman.
Adam is explaining the real world booking/ratings practicality to taking the night off in addition to the kind gesture.
Adam is doing a Trunk Club live read
Gina tries to move on and Adam takes it back to Letterman, Adam is explaining his TiVo cutoff before the very end of the last show, he is now lecturing the staff at TiVo to implement new features that track when a show in preempted or running long and records the extra few minutes.
Adam is sharing what he was hoping for from David on his final episode but never got that moment, Gina says that he did show his wife and kids and said goodnight one last time.
Adam wanted a totally stripped down and raw “tell us a story” show instead of a 25th anniversary style episode. Gina has an interested tidbit about ‘Everlong’ and why the song was chosen.
4th Story is on a restaurant in China offering discounts to women wearing miniskirts, R. Lee jokes about knowing some of the girls pictured in the story.
Adam is now asking R. Lee about life in the Philippines, hilarious observations, phrasing and even a goofy and quick musical bit, very funny.
5th Story is on a new survey that allows people to gauge if they’re being paid a fair wage for their profession, Adam asks if the survey adjusts for location and median income.
Lee says thinks the average wage in the Philippines is still about 10$ per day and Adam takes it back to his whorehouses once again.
Adam wants to know what percentage of the customers are locals, R. Lee says the local guys typically have “their own” places to frequent and is places were more often frequented by service men.
Adam says that if you’re going to put your life on the line, you should be able to pay for a blowjob and R. Lee explains it was only 10 bucks to have one of his gals for the entire evening.
Gina wraps the news.
Adam is now doing a Dollar shave Club Live Read
Gary and BB endorsed, Adam gives out the plugs and wraps up the show.
“Too many Mama San’s and not enough whores!” – Adam