Giovanni’s Superfan Sidebar 05/19/2014 – Mike Rowe, Live from the San Francisco Palace of Fine Arts
A real time blog where Superfan Giovanni does recap and commentary on the show as it happens and opines on all things ACS
Guest – Mike Rowe, Live from the San Francisco Palace of Fine Arts
Recorded 05-18-2014 – Release Date 05-19-2014
Production Number #1328
Adam is opening the show live with Mike Rowe making his 4th appearance on the podcast, a KLSX ACS legend, I called into the show and requested they book him then weeks later he’s on and refuses to leave after two segments and ended up staying for a record 9, awesome!
They’re all on stage live from San Francisco, Adam has a nice reaction to the crowd’s excitement and corrects Mike Dawson.
BB says he wrote “Who!?” in nearly all 150 books he signed, Adam is bringing up the woman he saw texting and walking while leaning backwards, feet 45 degrees in front of her.
Adam says he told Alison that everyone should get hit by a car once just to learn a lesson, as a person who has been clipped about a dozen times I have to agree, Adam has a point about entitlement and situational awareness.
Mike Rowe is in the mix and Adam is joking about everyone being eye to eye with their own femur to learn a healthy fear of cars and crossing the street.
Alison asks Adam and Mike about a time before cell phones, what people did when crossing the street and Adam has a point about things that are formally activities that now are things you do while texting.
Adam is bringing up the material from his book on cars and what he proposes, Adam is telling them about the “moose jizz” airbag Russian roulette.
Mike has a great consequences reply as if this wasn’t as insane as it is.
Alison is now bringing up the real world scenario when someone had to remove you from the car covered in moose jizz, hilarious “secondhand moose bukake on the car seat” riff from Adam.
Mike just spells it out and it’s hilarious, this riff originated on Episode #1054 from April of last year, Adam is now telling them about watching his son run track, long distance track at 7 ½ years old, Adam says it’s brutal.
Adam is joking about the day’s events and the 6 man podium, his son got 8th place and rocked the Hussain Bolt move/pose while standing next to the podium.
They talk about Sonny’s scores and BB has a back and forth with Adam and a quasi-dig, the audience reacts accordingly.
Adam is sharing his son’s desire to be in the Olympics, BB has a hilarious one liner about him being the caterer and Adam is now riffing about him jacking off moose for a career.
Adam is bringing up how the call went out for a medical professional mid-flight, Adam is telling them about a guy who collapsed in 1st class.
Adam saw a woman who was asked to move back to coach so a man who collapsed in 1st class could take her seat, what an odd story.
Adam is sharing his “airplane doctor” test for all on air medical personalities, if they won’t jump into action on a flight then they ain’t a real doctor.
Adam is telling them about Dr. Drew and his wife who brought their dogs over, Adam is explaining how the dogs were always on a mission and one of them took a big shit in his yard.
Adam says that when you step in dogshit you’re immune to smelling it, he also says you can’t feel dogshit, it feels like warm butter on your heel, feel and smell nothing.
Adam had poop all over his shoe, he’s joking about using Lynette’s toothbrush to clean it, nice back and forth with Mike.
Adam mixes up the name Buca Di Beppo and BB corrects him, Adam is now bringing up the concept of family style cuisine and how one has to pretend to enjoy eating at a Benihana.
Adam used the salad tray, he filled it with water and floated the shoe.
Adam says he has a big backyard and wasn’t running a series of decreasing circles around the perimeter, hilarious!
Adam is taking it back to his book and the hotel room guilt trip pictures of dolphins asking out about using extra towels and flushing too much.
Adam says it’s never a spikey puffer fish or “whatever tries to sting lesbians as they swim from Cuba to Catalina…” and now they’re all joking about it.
Adam is bringing up his hilarious/insane obsession with photographing hotel room shower knobs and he’s sharing his theory on how much water is wasted.
He’s now getting to all the possible counter arguments and citing all of the other parts of the room that is mandated by building and safety codes.
Mike Rowe is bringing up hotel remote controls and comforters, BB calls back the jizz airbag and Adam corrects him, 1 in 10, he’s not insane!
Mike is now citing some tales from the road with his guys pulling pranks, including some beef bouillon in his shower head.
Adam says it’s like the Shining but for a fat guy, gold!
Adam and Mike are getting to how the reptilian part of the brain struggles to determine what kind of awful poo you must be covered in.
Adam is now bringing up the needle nose pliers they would bring on the road to illegally watch the porn without paying for it.
Mike is now painting a picture and asking Adam about the setting, Adam is telling him about how they never bought a 2nd remote and would end up stuck watching porn all weekend.
BB has a weird “Dirty Jobs” joke and now Adam is asking Mike about his current projects, Adam and Mike are now riffing about Aliens building Stonehenge and the pyramids, hilarious gaslighting angle from Ace.
Adam is now riffing about the idea of a being an ancient pharaoh and the concept of someone digging your grave for you while you’re alive.
Adam is now asking Mike if he’s going to be cremated and he’s stating he’s going to do it all and mentions “The Neptune Society.”
Pretty elaborate riff from Mike, Adam is now bringing up the idea of a Viking archer missing at a funeral and the impatient temperament of Viking, nice use of “Tovar” and Mike is riffing with him, claiming it’s a shitty bow.
Mike is explaining the next place he’s going for his new show, a clothing manufacturer remove that has anti fart technology.
Adam is now riffing his new show “Whose wife is more pissed?” and asking the wife of the man who invented the clothing line or the wife with of the previous type of gent described.
Mike says the new show will air on CNN this fall, he’s explaining how he’s still friendly with Discovery but is trying to escape the type of reality television that most networks want to program.
Mike is sharing how he used to host “Evening Magazine” in San Francisco and how a segment from that show led to “Dirty Jobs”.
Totally Topical TiVo Trivia Today
1st “after a bitter divorce and actor disguises himself…”
2nd “his girlfriend’s pregnancy send a SFO child psychologist into a panic”
3rd “a police detective…”
4th”San Francisco’s dirty Harry Callahan…”
Mike is now mocking the game.
5th”an ex 60s computer hacker and his company are tapped for a black box job”
6th”A young man with a death wish and a 79 year old woman…”
7th”a SFO poet who fears commitment has a girlfriend who he suspects might not be who she appears…”
8th “A Control Freak’s disreputable brother introduces…”
Alison shares her bone to pick about “The Vagina Movie” and “Whatever and Maude” are not names of movies, Adam has a nice new twist on assholes/excuses, saying they all need to be raped, gold!
They go right to break unannounced of course.
Back from break.
1st Story is an update on Alec Baldwin who has now peddled against traffic again and rode on the sidewalk, Adam is mocking the idea of narrowly missing something.
Adam is joking about Fatty Arbuckle vs. Alec Baldwin and what a man must due to be outcast from society.
Adam is now sharing how men can go from mellow to angry back to mellow and then angry again at 53 years old, Adam is bringing up the notion of people who weren’t born now writing you tickets for living your life.
Adam is making a point about young people now all of the cops, Alison is bringing up Adam’s 50th birthday and he says he’s decided he doesn’t like it.
Adam is now sharing his concept of being 30 years out of high school as a teen vs. how it feels to be him in his shoes, grey pubes and zits on his back.
Adam says this isn’t midlife, it’s 2/3rd’s life and he’s telling them about bringing Natalia to Jimmy Kimmel Live.
Adam was making his 45th appearance on JKL and it’s the 20th anniversary of Adam and Jimmy’s relationship, Adam is joking about Evening Magazine and living in the past.
He’s telling them about looking at the pictures of Jimmy and the guests “they wish they had tonight” including “one of Oprah’s titties” over Adam.
Adam is telling Mike about not having a photo up outside the dressing rooms, he’s telling them about his daughter quizzing him about having “butterflies” and how he thought it was weird for his 7 year old to be able to process that.
Mike Rowe is sharing his reaction to first appearing on the Tonight Show in 2005, Mike wants to know how long Adam has felt like a fake.
Adam is now saying the worst thing you can do before doing one of these shows is to watch it on air the night before, nice Charlize Theron riff.
Adam is interrupting Alison to explain what he’s started doing, he has thought he may never 69 again, never play an aggressive half-court basketball game again, all the things Adam did for the last time without knowing it.
Mike is sharing what freaks him out about guesting on talk shows, he’s bringing up the various producers who work behind the scenes to make everything almost 100% scripted.
Mike is explaining Adam’s version of prep and how refreshing it is in comparison, nice explanation Mike!
Adam is getting to the typical call he has with the segment producer who is trying to mine stories and comedy gold from you, Adam is now playing the segment producer and quizzing Mike about his various stories “what else you got?”
Mike is bringing up the 90 minutes he did with one of Oprah’s producer and how the show was all about the possibility that her and her viewers were drinking recycled urine water.
Mike shares his bullshit response he gave to Oprah when he was asked about the urine water, Adam says Oprah pees into Steadman’s cupped hands, so she doesn’t know about the average person’s bathroom process.
2nd Story Is on the birth of Mike August’s first child, Alison is showing a picture of his new daughter Hailey Sky and Alison wants to know about the common practice of C-Sections and what would happen in before they were invented.
Nobody is telling her the mother and child would often die, more than half of women died via childbirth throughout history, Adam is now riffing “I don’t know nothing about birthing no babies” and BB is playing the drop along with a drop of his own Self Satisfied Sniff.
Adam is bringing up how he heard about the weight of Mike August’s daughter and his own daughter asked him how much he she weighed.
Adam wants to know why knowing dumb random facts about dates and weights makes someone better than him, BB is now riffing asking Adam about Lamborghini stats.
Adam is joking around “she had a super swollen vagina, its weird!” and joking a fetus that you’d like to have a beer with.
Adam is killing it joking about newborn babies and the idea of them having a sense of humor, Alison is bringing up people who think their pets have sense of humor, Adam calls Dre’s dog hilarious using the shit prank as an example.
Mike is telling the gang about a “dry dock” poop practical joke and now Adam is telling him to combine his two favorite bathroom pranks and BB reminds them that they are at the Palace of Fine arts.
They all give congratulations, Congratulation Mike!
3rd Story Is on a woman who posed as a high school student named Charity Stevens.
Adam calls her the worst con woman in the world and jokes about her getting extra fish sticks, Alison is sharing her take and Adam says he wouldn’t mind going back to High School.
Adam is now quizzing Mike about his high school experience, he says was a jock and acted in plays, equally despised and adored.
4th Story Is about a single mother who found a 12 foot African python in her bathtub, Alison keeps saying “found this” works for a live show, not for the podcast.
Adam is now asking who the guys are who get these snakes, the leather vest wearing middle aged dude.
Adam is explaining he understands rich guys building menageries out of boredom like Siegfried and Roy, he doesn’t get guys in apartments owning these giant snakes.
Adam says reptiles have “0 movement” and “eating you” and he’s joking about guys who own them trying to get you touch their pet reptiles.
Adam says he’s heard a noise and gone to investigate so many times, that if he did go outside and find a junkie in his underpants with a machete he would be relieved, at least it’s something instead of nothing.
They’re joking about how short lived and fleeting his relief would be.
Alison is asking Adam about his nightly patrols, if he uses a gun or bat, he’s joking about using a Samurai sword.
Adam is now getting to gun safes and home gun safety, hilarious!
“The Catch 22 of the .22” – Adam
5th Story Is on a man who rushed the red carpet at the Cannes film festival and jumped under America Ferrara’s dress.
Adam wants to know how everyone gets to go to Cannes, she was there for an animated movie and Adam has a killer reply.
Alison explains the man who pulled the stunt is a known Ukrainian prankster, Adam jokes about “Jackoff Smirnoff not getting anywhere near America’s asshole” and riffs it with BB.
Adam is now doing a live read for Go to Meeting.
6th Story is on a high school prank about a “mandatory vagina inspection
Alison is now reading the flyer handed out around the school, BB is now getting drops up a storm.
Alison says “Barry McCockinher” and BB is praising the kids as geniuses, Alison wants to know how Adam knows that must be the joke.
Adam is explaining how Harry C-Word (Seaward) is his new favorite version of this.
Adam is asking about the students, Alison says the police are looking into it.
Adam is now getting to the war on adolescent men, he’s citing another woman’s theory on today’s culture and its effects on developing men.
Adam is getting to young man’s unyielding desire to prank and fucking with people, especially their peers.
Adam says we are basically telling 15yr old boys to not be 15yr old boys anymore, he wants to know why the cops need to get involved in this.
Adam said he would have had 1500 of these kinds of “offensives” of the modern age, Adam wants to know who cares about guys fucking around and pulling pranks.
Mike is praising how funny the prank was, he is right it was well written.
Mike says they’re a little tasteless but the execution is decent, he’s now putting himself in the role of the administration.
7th Story is on 8yr old Kansas girl who took control of the wheel when her mother lost consciousness while driving, Adam has a great callback to the guy in 1st class.
Alison is sharing how the young girl was avoiding hitting the police officer who was trying to help her, Adam says he likes this but not as much as the cat who saved the boy from the dog.
Adam says he showed the video to his kids and now they want a cat, he had to explain to them that their cat won’t be a super-cat.
Adam wants to know when we can drop the dog owner into a sack of super angry kitties covered in AIDS, he’s clearly not happy with the Pitbull owner from the video.
Adam is sharing his resolution to fire the Pitbull via an air canon into a jet impeller, Adam says one of them is going to be putdown, either them or the dog.
“Kiss your ass goodbye or your dog, shithead!” – Adam
Adam wants to know if the audience would watch the show with the dog going into the jet engine, the audience would go for the owner, Adam loves that we live in a world where people love animals much more than other humans. Alison is wrapping the news.
Adam is now doing a live read, giving out the plugs and wrapping up the show.
Mike has 4 flawless episodes, nice work champ!
Adam has some sad news for fans in SFO, they have a flight and can’t stay to sign nor meet nor greet, and they take it fairly in stride.