Giovanni’s Superfan Sidebar 05/08/2015 – Kelley James

Giovanni’s Superfan Sidebar 05/08/2015 – Kelley James

A real time blog where Superfan Giovanni does recap and commentary on the show as it happens and opines on all things ACS

Guest Kelley James

Recorded 05-07-2015 – Release Date 05-08-2015

Production Number #1571

Show Page

Adam has an “it’s all you guys” intro and BB plays some classic Huell Howser as today’s #TopDrop and now Adam is commenting on his fading voice and day spent working in Azusa.

Adam is explaining how one of the producers showed him a picture of a dog chained to an entertainment unit on the front lawn of a nearby house.

Adam is now telling the people who are apologists for fucked up people that this has nothing to do with poverty, it’s a cardboard hollow entertainment set.

 

Adam is now asking the gang if they would be with him in his taking a stand, he’s showing them some photos and asking for the most depressing picture of the day.

Adam is sharing how they were filming something and some crazy Latino lady walked by and asked them what they were doing, Adam wants to know why someone needs to ask them questions about filming.

Adam explains the crazy cunt called the cops on them and 3 of Azusa’s finest showed up after they tried to get her out of their shot and finished the piece.

 

Adam is now explaining that 3 cops rolled up on a crew with permits who were in the process of beautifying the backyard of one of the neighbors.

Adam explains the “drought patrol” showed after the cops and Adam says he would tell the city to fuck off if he redid his pool and wasn’t allowed to refill it.

Adam ask if you want that person, the Latin woman to be in trouble for this, he uses the hypothetical of those cops not being available to help someone in actual need.

 

Gina has a funny neighborhood specific one liner, Adam jokes about pissing in a radiator and wants to know if they would be cool with a regime who walks around the neighborhood mowing the front lawns of people who leave entertainment centers on lawns.

Adam has a very gentle “unless you absolutely need this out here” and a “let us help you throw it out” idea for this regime this “Get Your Shit Together Task Force” he is proposing.

Adam is now mocking the idea that these laws surrounding bogus 911 calls and his proposed punishment/fines for making them would somehow impact real crime and good Samaritans would be too fearful to pick up the phone and help.

Adam is now ranting about the day where we can’t use our abilities to make decisions and how it will be undoing of society.

 

Adam mocks “yeah but” apparently it doesn’t work as a reply with the “still” added to it, Adam says that the woman didn’t say a production was going on, she was just dropping a dime as she had nothing better to do.

Adam is asking them about having a celebration or party and wants to know if there has ever been a situation where they came back the next day and everything was returned exactly as it was, always a stray beer or a half sealed cap on a seltzer bottle.

Adam wants to know who are the people who don’t fully twist caps on bottles, Adam says there are always 2 ½ things left unfinished.

 

Adam tells BB they need to get married after he tells him about his lemon procurement producers.

Adam says that most people are asleep and the people who are awake are awake for everything, Adam is telling them about going into his trailer this morning and Gina helps flesh it out.

Adam and BB are now going further intro this and Adam gives BB the OK to fart in his car, Adam explains his level of under station of fairness and how he did a show without a signing last night.

 

Adam says he had August drive because he drives like a maniac and Adam likes to drink cold a one, Gina asks about August’s lost watch.

 

Adam is doing a Stamps.com live read

“Yeah people send in their boobies” – Adam

 

Adam is now explaining that the fans wanted him to sign stuff, he was willing to sing their stuff in the alley but they didn’t bring a pen.

Adam says that was on them, I usually bring like 3-5 sharpies when on the road with them, just in case.

Adam says that August then revealed he had a Sharpie in his bag, they stopped the car, and Adam signed the stuff and gave the fans some handshakes.

He describes a more than acceptable form of a shake with a fan who then objected and Adam told him they were good, the fan objected and then things got heated, oh no…

 

Adam is now telling him about the people who object to being relieved of duty due to their attitude problems by swearing and being generally abusive.

Gina shares her willingness to gives hugs to fans and how she would feel if a fan demanded a “real hug” and now Caelan is on mic giving his take, confirming everything Adam said.

Adam says that fan was just drunk and perhaps a little too much of him comes out, BB is asking Adam about his experience in “wicker work” and they move on.

 

Q and Ace

1st Caller Izzy, Adam mocks his “hi” and asks a question about the douchiest move while in a grocery store line and casually mentions that Adam guested on his show, Adam guests on a lot shows dude.

BB asks if the guy is still talking and Adam hangs up on him before he gets to plug it, Adam says if you want a plug you must provide more content that that.

 

2nd Caller JB, he jokes about the last caller and mentions Adam’s “Make Money While You Sleep” rule of thumb as expressed on Classic Loveline (kind of) and he’s telling them about his line of work and how it’s connected to adult entertainment.

He noticed the daughter of a guy he knows, Adam asks if he she’s vying for a stripper gig.

Adam cites his theory on rent controlled living and now shares a similar theory on how dancing is the greatest gig ever for cute 22yr old chicks and can provide a life for them but only for a short time.

 

Adam says that Bar Tending is the male version of that kind of job, Adam is now taking his time “broiling sausage out in the sun” on the job site and how the exact same dude could be prospering as a Bartender and Adam says that at a certain point you end up being 45 and just a Bartender.

Adam goes back to JB and he wants to know if should hire on and make sure she’s working for a safe company and not go to a less scrupulous place.

Adam is now suggesting a funny way to test her and then offers up some real world advice, Gina gives her take and offers some insight.

 

Adam is now doing a live read for Onnit.com

Adam is going on about their Warrior bars and their MZT Oil and how excited Drew is about the stuff.

 

Hooray for BaldyWood

BB saw ‘Winning the Racing Life of Paul Newman’ and asks Adam about the additional directing work done by Nate Adams who Adam says did a lot to shape this movie.

BB is now giving his take on the great characters in the documentary and asks Adam about ‘A Band Called Death’ and he reveals he hasn’t seen it but does reference ‘Bad Brains’.

BB says the great button at the end of the film with John Lassiter was a great unseen addition to the film, much like the big match up in ‘Hoop Dreams’ or the bankruptcy in ‘The Queen of Versailles’.

 

BB says this will appeal to everyone and you don’t need to be into racing nor Paul to enjoy this movie, BB says this one of the best things Adam has ever done.

Adam says his dad loved it and Adam says because of his upbringing he can be fair about the people who will or won’t like his work, building up to how this is the exception, he says it appeals to everyone regardless of gender, race or proclivities, it’s for humans.

BB really liked it, no letter grade?

 

Gina tells the viewers to use their headphones if they must watch it on their laptop, Adam jokes about his agent James Babydoll Dixon falling asleep at the premier.

 

Adam is doing a Draft Kings live read

Adam throws it to break.

 

They’re back from break with Kelley James getting 1 step closer to his 10th appearance on the show.

Adam says Kelley is one of their favorites at the studio, Adam is asking him about his new golf themed online series.

Adam is talking about gambling on the golf course and Kelly tells them about watching Michael Jordan bet 50k on a single hole.

 

Adam says that Gambling makes everything far more interesting, Adam is now praising Kelly and his abilities that Adam could never match.

Adam says he was listening to Wiz Khalifa on SNL, he shares his take on guys who surprise you vs. guys like P. Diddy who Adam could possibly emulate.

Adam was prepared to be blown away by Wiz, they’re now playing the clip.

 

Adam is joking about the guy on the piano opening the song, Kelly offers his insight into the performance and now Adam is back to the light lifting for Wiz, Adam is being fair and praising him for his arm movements.

Adam says if he was just given last minute notice he must fulfill one role from that performance he would for sure take Wiz’s part.

BB has Kelly weigh in further and now Adam is asking if he told them about someone sending him the tribute to Jon Lord done by ‘Deep Purple’ and he plays ‘Burn’ live for them, citing it as his favorite song.

 

Adam is sharing his theory on why the English guys can rock harder than the Americans, he cited their classical training and then contrasts them against a band like ‘Third Eye Blind’ where a guy just wants to get his dick sucked.

Adam is saying he watched that video with his kids and his wife on the big screen.

Adam wants the whole DVD or Blu Ray set, Kelly says he now runs red turn arrows with his wife and they call it “the Carolla” and BB mentions how they have many arrows surrounding the warehouse.

 

Adam is using the red light cameras that can be employed when the city wants to make money, unlike their ability to install 50$ rain sensors to turn off the municipal water sprinklers or a better intersection layout.

Adam tells everyone to just drive through them, Kelly says he got it from Adam’s book.

Gary found the whole concert, he just wants the last 2 ½ minutes of that song and he apologizes to BB, and he says he’s had a very long week and he wants to rock out even though BB objected earlier.

They play the rest of ‘Burn’ and he tells Kelly to ask his questions and he’ll start his freestyle, Gina says ‘Marshmallow Fluff’, Adam goes with ‘Red Turn Arrows’ and BB says ‘Meatloaf’.

 

Adam is now doing a Trunk Club live read

Guitar music bed edition, Gina describes the bloat of a Wetzel’s pretzel after a mall trip, evocative of the experience, nice.

 

Kelly is now doing it, he has some great original stuff and comments on the dark theme of that one.

Kelly is now plugging his new band ‘FlowTet’ and Adam tells people to go enjoy some live music.

BB says he feels like live music is coming back and Kelly mentions that Dawson was there, he says he recorded the whole set and plugs his show ‘Front of House’

Hear the 1st part of the set here.

 

 

Gina’s News

1st Story is on the apology from Samantha Armitage an Australian TV host, Gina explains the controversy over her comments, BB has a fucked up but hilarious drop of Hershey’s comment after Adam talks about the children of mixed race white and black couples often taking on more of the black features.

Adam is commenting on the look of the person sitting next to Samantha and Adam pitches a coffee table book of just these reaction shots, BB suggests making a bit out of that.

 

2nd Story is on Adam Levine’s “Sugar Bombing” from someone outside the JKL studio, Adam is now mocking the outfit he was wearing for his sugar absorption ability, he says windbreaker would be your number #1 choice, his plush outfit will be ruined.

 

3rd Story is on the trailer for ‘Human Centipede 3’ Adam admits he never saw the first and didn’t know about the 2nd one, Adam is explaining how he was forced to watch ‘2 Girls 1 Cup’ by the late great Robert Schimmel, his legacy!

Adam is commenting on how he doesn’t need to track down people calling him a douchebag or horrible sports injury footage, he assumes it’s out there and he’s good.

Adam jokes about getting his revenge on Schimmel, implying he played a role in his passing and now Adam jokes about the “Low Budge, High Fudge” production of the first Human Centipede movie.

 

Gina is now breaking down the premise of the movie in lieu of showing the full trailer, Adam asks about the budget for the original and now they’re playing some of the trailer.

BB brings up the “100% medically accurate” slug line of the first movie and Adam jokes about Eric Roberts slumming it in this movie.

 

Adam is doing a Reverie Bed live read

Bluetooth speaker accessory edition, Wow Adam really gave them their money’s worth.

 

4th Story is on parents who bartered cocaine and marijuana with their daughters to get them to do their chores and get good grades.

Gina has all of the details, BB asks Gina if the father is a good looking guy and she says he kinda reminds her of her boyfriend.

 

5th Story is on the new TLC Game Show ‘Labor Games’ and Gina shares her “Terrible Life Choices” riff on TLC and Adam comments on Lisa Kushell (Arch) as the host and how he used to have a crush on her.

Adam cites her role in ‘Windy City Heat’ and is telling the story of the time he housesat for his buddy Chris Darga, Adam is making a point about how even something like staying at an 800 square foot shitbox house is such a nice change of pace when you’re living in poverty like he was.

Adam explains he was using his buddy’s civic at the time as well, he says he remembers thinking about asking her out and tells the rarely shares details of the time he tried to ask Lisa out.

 

Adam is now explaining how he was hand winding a VHS porn tape with a wooden kitchen spoon to cap off that evening.

Gina asks if Lynette wanted to be part of the show how he would react, Adam is now telling Gina about his actual experience with the childbirth, as happened live on air on KLSX on 06/07/2006 and Adam says “Don’t coach me up Cunt” to the angry nurse who busted his balls about pissing in the bathroom in his wife’s suite.

 

Adam is now riffing with BB, gold!

Gina wraps up the news.

 

Adam is asking Kelly about cutting the umbilical cord for his new child, Adam says his cord wasn’t attached, it was attached to the kids but not his wife.

Adam says this was one of a million things he’s been told will be meaningful to him later that literally means nothing to him and wouldn’t be something he would bring up again had it not been forced upon him, now he will recall it forever ironically.

BB says most of this new age parenting stuff makes the people feel better, not the parents nor the kids.

 

Adam is doing a Simply Safe live read

 

Adam is giving out the plugs and wrapping up the show.