Episodes

Giovanni’s Superfan Sidebar 05/02/2013 – Jeff Ross, Live from Amalfi

A real time blog where Superfan Giovanni does recap and commentary on the show as it happens and opines on all things ACS

Guest – Jeff Ross, Live from Amalfi

Recorded 05-01-2013 – Release Date 05-02-2013

Production Number #1069

Show Page

Dawson has a clever spirited intro that’s a nice play off Jeff’s honorary title and Adam is mocking Jeff’s late arrival due to weed and probable munchies.

BB has a choice Dana Gould #TopDrop and Adam has a great reaction.

Adam is now sharing a story of hanging at Bryan Cranston’s house to film a teaser for his upcoming crowd funded film project.

Adam is now on a crazy riff about the weight of assholes and BB has a funny donut hole aside.

 

Adam is now sharing the anecdote of his dog and her “half a buffalo” worth of waste during a walk earlier in the day, Alison is remarking on her dog’s own perplexing poop problem.

Adam is briefly forgetting about the “Holy Robinson Peete” Loveline where she was promoting “For Your Love” and crapping on Shaq’s dong size.

 

Adam is now back to how the filming came around for him and Bryan with a hilarious detail about Bryan’s next movie project and how Bryan went out of his way to make it work for Adam.

BB has a comment and question about Matt Fondiler’s mad dash search for a “highboy” director’s chair for the filming, Adam and Alison are weighing in.

Adam is now finishing the interrupted(he interrupted himself) anecdote from last night’s show about having dinner with his kids and their friends, Adam is launching into a request for all kids to up their reply game when it comes to questions about potential careers.

 

Adam is now delivering the crazy narcissistic reply from his daughter’s friends and he has a funny aside nobody appreciates.

Adam is sharing Sonny’s hilarious reply in defense of Natalia’s 3rd grade friend, and now he’s joking about the perceived chasm between children in different grades.

They’re on a crazy tangential riff and Jeff Ross has entered the building.

 

BB is joking about Jeff’s hunt for food and he’s now joining the stage, Adam was correct that Jeff did drive to another location and was mixed up.

Adam is asking him for an update on “The Burn” and asking him about the lack of transparency for a second season order, Jeff is now arguing against Adam’s point and Adam has a killer reply mocking his own staff.

Adam is asking Jeff if he remembers their conversation form Kimmel’s house a few weeks back, after the fog of weed clears he recalls the cape discussion.

 

Adam is now telling Jeff about going to Bishop Don Magic Juan’s tailor and how he could probably get a cape there along with some possible injuries.

Jeff is asking if the audience knows why Adam thought he should start rocking a cape and Adam has a killer one liner about his own thought process.

Adam has an awesome claim about collar’s becoming something else and he’s now on a riff about being single and only dating women that wear giant Lucite heals so he doesn’t have to lay down a coat over a puddle.

Adam is now tying the death of chivalry to the invention of “stripper heels” and Jeff is now asking about the lining for his hypothetical cape.

 

Totally Topical TiVo TV Trivia

This might be their first attempt at this variant on the show, Adam is asking questions and clearing up the rules between Dawson and Gary.

 

1st description “Debra and Ray …”

Adam is critiquing Lynch for this one.

 

2nd description “Raj and Sheldon”

The audience ruined this one.

 

3rd description “Brennan and Booth”

Adam is explaining why Lynch predicted this would suck and how he tried to defend Alison.

 

4th description “Adam and Jaimie”

 

5th description “studio audience votes”

 

6th description “The hound is judged”

 

7th description “The couples perform for the judges on Latin night”

 

8th description “DJ wants to videotape Darlene”

Alison misses it with a smart play picking “Full House”

 

9th description “how powdered eggs”

Aceman FTW!

 

10th description “Sophia …”

Wow BB!

 

11th description “Chelsea returns to beauty school”

Adam is railing into poor Lynch again and he’s now explaining what is never going to work out in life, he’s citing the “do it anyway” results and using bunt cakes and BJ’s to further exemplify his point.

Adam is really going off, Alison has an awesome Boner/Growing Pains one liner to boot.

 

12th “Tony learns information about his father from Hesh”

Adam is still too angry to get it, Adam should have it and it’s now game over and BB gets the win, he’s making sure to rub in his win and Adam spells out exactly what just happened, nice one liner description from Dawson about “Hesh” as well.

Adam is now asking if “Bones’ even exists, he’s riffing about them only making the commercials for it as some elaborate “gaslighting” scenario.

Adam is now on a riff about good looking people and their lack of crime fighting abilities, he’s citing the “first 48” and other reality shows about actual crimes being solved.

 

Adam is now on the “Will they won’t they” concept and how it doesn’t exist in real life, BB has a killer on liner and Adam tops it with a POWERFUL copier toner pun.

Adam just reference his “cash register” for the first time in quite a while, Adam is now riffing on “realtor pads” and he’s now making a larger point about the pictures for realtors.

He wants to know if there is anything scarier than the older real estate couple, he’s going super in depth to describe their look, wow!

 

They’re all riffing on realtors and their “image”, Adam is focusing on how they drive cars they can’t afford and he’s now revealing the inverse by explaining how celebrities are the exact opposite with their vehicle choices.

Adam is riffing with Jeff about his car, nice DAG reference and Jeff is explaining the purchase with a funny comment.

Adam is asking Jeff about his previous Porsche purchases and how Cousin Sal would desecrate them, Adam has a hilarious observation on the extreme lineage of hate crimes that were going on with that vandalism.

 

They’re now riffing on Cousin Sal and his ability to quote Jeff and his act line and verse, Adam has a funny comment about Sal’s hypothetical variant on Jeff’s cape.

Jeff is elaborating on Sal’s ability to mock him, Jeff is telling them about being the first standup to do a comedy set on Jimmy Kimmel Live and how Sal was planted in the audience to distract him.

Jeff is bringing up Adam’s big win at the Toyota Grand Prix and they’re having a funny back and forth about it.

 

Alison’s News

Alison is now revealing her earlier comment she chambered so Jeff could continue, her foot fell asleep and revived and she’s remarking on how painful it is.

Adam is contemplating if balls fall asleep and has a great Neil young reference, Alison is revealing a feminine variant and BB has a nice drop.

Adam is telling the gang about the nerve damage in his left hand and Jeff just uttered the truest statement I may have ever heard from the man.

 

Her top story is on the latest 3 arrests in the Boston Marathon bombing case and she’s reading the details of what the suspects have been charged with.

Adam is riffing on the doofus buddies and want’s to setup a contest for worst mother, he’s going off on the mom of these two turds and how his own mother’s reaction would differ.

Jeff has a funny one liner and Adam is calling back the north Hollywood shootout wrongful death case, BB has the facts as this was covered definitively on one of my guest appearances on the show.

Adam’s got a great Chet with a machete idea, good stuff!

 

2nd story is on Billy Baldwin joining the USA committee to preserve Olympic wrestling, Alison is reading the facts and wasn’t aware this was going on.

Adam is now riffing on the ridiculous events that are in the Olympics when compared to wrestling, Adam is now describing the origins of the Olympics in hilarious graphic language, nice one liner from BB!

Alison has a great Mike August mention and Adam is now calling it the oldest sport and explaining why it’s necessary.

Alison is reading the names of the other celebrities who are campaigning for this cause, Adam is riffing about Chynna Phillips and it’s reminiscent of the time I called into the KLSX ACS with my infamous “Josie Bissett” name pull right out of the gate after BB and T failed to produce the name for Ace.

 

Adam is now walking them through the time he borrowed the Wilson Phillips CD from his roommate after the north Hollywood quake when his ex and her mom were living at his house and he was afflicted with some sort of ancient burial dust disease or boxing related herpetic sores.

Adam is now going off on Meredith Brook’s “I’m a bitch” and how he hates it, Alison is now doing some funny lyrics for a variant from the male perspective.

Adam is now going off on Shania Twain’s “Damn I feel like a woman” although I think he wanted “That don’t impress me much” with the talk singing, Adam’s closing one liner is gold!

 

3rd story is on a recent list of the ultimate cookie rankings that listed Oreos in the number 2 spot, Adam is calling it a tween’er cookie, the minivan of cookies.

Adam has a funny “fortune cookie” riff and he’s now advocating for the almond cookie.

Alison is reading off the rest of the list and Adam is now ordering all lists to now be run by him first, the audience has an assist and Adam has a killer “Schindler’s list” comment.

 

Adam is going off on the almost oxymoron of the term “Jewish Deli” and the pink box that bakery confections often arrive in and Jeff has a killer reply.

Adams going in depth on his days in “Hebrew Heights” and the super rare Alex Arotto story involving his mom and a massive fart from the Aceman.

Alison is now quizzing Adam on the farts that fly in the control room mid show and Adam is quizzing her on her level of amusement when it comes to fart comedy.

Adam is sharing his secret fart move to trick people into getting close to the blast zone, hilarious and Alison’s reactions are gold!

 

4th story is on a recent survey among men and women in regards to what level of facial stubble is most attractive on men, Adam has a hilarious callback to his nude wrestling riff and BB has a nice deadpan one liner.

Alison is reading the results of the study and Adam is claiming that “Heavy Stubble” sounds like a fat rapper, BB has a nice addition too!

 

Adam is wrapping the show with some plugs and Jeff has a funny observation about the bouncy house Jimmy Kimmel generously bought for Adam’s kids, Adam’s got a killer reply and a nice plug for Jeff!

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