Episodes

Giovanni’s Superfan Sidebar 04/11/2014 – Theo Von and Tom Barnard

A real time blog where Superfan Giovanni does recap and commentary on the show as it happens and opines on all things ACS

Guest Theo Von and Tom Barnard

Recorded 04-10-2014 – Release Date 04-11-2014

Production Number #1301

Show Page

Adam is opening the show with a tease for a new Rich Banks song aimed at Alison, BB has a Pat O’Brien #TopDrop requested by Matt Fondiler.

Adam is talking about BB’s 1500$ book on Ebay, Adam is telling them about his audiobook recording for President Me and he’s giving a few examples of the guys on his list who will be taken out with a drone if he takes power.

Adam is bringing up the severed arm of a hobo/horse apple idea he had about the women who feed horses with their mouths, Adam is citing a few more examples.

 

Adam is explaining how “Gay dude who sunbathes naked on apartment lawn” Adam is describing the original premise and the confusing addition of the word “Naked.”

He’s really breaking it down.

Adam is explaining his process trying to figure out how the word got in there, he immediately ruled out Mike Lynch, almost referring to him as his 2nd eyes, a vote of confidence indeed.

 

Adam just revealed that the publisher added it, he’s explaining why and how, he’s telling them about Mike’s reaction to the mistake.

Adam is quoting Mike Lynch and bonding with BB over the frustration of a “locked” book with errors that can’t be fixed and worse, which were caused by someone else.

Adam wants to know where “naked” came from and Dawson gets on mic to explain Adam’s theory from the recording session is probably right.

Adam is now doing a live read, Alison is joining him for Life Lock.

 

Gary is now reading the excerpt from Adam’s book, nice job.

They’re now playing the new Rich Banks song “Some things Rosen just doesn’t understand” Adam and Alison both object to a mistake in the lyrics, regarding pregnancy, breastfeeding and menstruation.

Alison wants to know if that’s the first time he’s rapped for a parody song and it’s the first I can recall, but there might be one I’m forgetting from the KLSX days, he’s done hundreds of them.

 

Q and Ace

1st Caller Tami, she wants to know why Adam adding a gender to the aspect of his daughter’s personality that likes him more now that he’s on T.V.

Tami is either forgetting or conveniently leaving off the part where Dr. Drew insists this is distinctively female and has to do with the biological and brain differences in men and women.

Adam is giving some great examples to prove his theory, Ben Affleck dating Susan Boyle and the ugliest Go Go vs. hot hostess.

Alison has a firsthand account as the “not most attractive” member of a band, hilarious beat off double entendre and then one liner, double joke.

 

Adam is giving some biological idea on all of this, Alison offers up an “ugly guy mysterious dong size” argument and Adam once again uses actual psychology to refute it, Alison agrees he’s right.

 

2nd Caller Pete, he wants Adam’s take on Rick Dees, Adam is ranting about people who suck in radio and how talented people can’t be held down but no talents can’t be propped up anymore.

Adam has a great “Tom Green will never again be a super star” point and says he likes Tom, Adam is now using professional sports as an analogy on top of his analogy.

Adam says Pauley Shore will never be Seth MacFarlane, BB wants to know why Adam has nostalgia for crappy TV.

 

Adam admits most of his shows are shitty, Alison is defending “The Facts of Life” and says it actually holds up along with the nostalgia she has for it.

 

3rd Caller John, he has an Alison’s bush joke and quasi plug for Nature Box.

John is making a point about conservative idealists who look upon the fake morality of 1950’s TV to base how they would like reality to be shaped, John admits the question could be insulting.

John is presuming that Adam’s is one of these people and also right wing.

 

Adam is now telling the gang about letting Naomi Scott, former Man Show assistant, fill in KLSX news gal and her husband is Adam Scott.

Adam is explaining that she “gave her word” about keeping his home safe for the filming they asked him about a couple weeks back.

Adam is now tying it all together and has a killer riff about segregated drinking fountains not being all bad, at least it reduced the line for the water fountains.

 

Adam is now pondering if the black only drinking fountains were far less busy due to the different amounts of the populace, Adam has a killer closing line about how he chooses to spend his time.

Adam is now doing a live read with BB, “I know Tires!” – Adam for Tire Rack

 

3rd Caller Mark, Adam has a killer “Alison’s hairy bush” opening joke, Mark wants to know why Adam’s parents kept having kids after they were so disaffected after his sister was born.

Adam is saying it’s a good question and not getting offended like Mark had feared, Adam says he’s never got into the “mistake” discussion with his parents and he’s citing his lack of a middle name, as well as his dad and his mom’s responses that were both widely unsatisfying.

Adam is now citing his parent’s lack of awareness and presence at The Feast of San Gennaro as another example of what kinds of people they are.

 

Adam is explaining how whipped up he would be to witness his son win the Toyota Celebrity Grand Prix, Adam says he thinks his parents do feel connected, they don’t notice how weird this is.

Adam has a great “are the dead?” question from other people whose families flew in for the feast.

Adam explains why this dynamic would never work in a movie, there is no big twist or reason for their estranged relationship.

 

Adam is now doing a live read for Grub hub and he’s really emphatic about how great it is.

They’re now going to break.

 

They’re back from break with Theo Von in studio making his ACS debut and the debut of the 2nd “Attack Ad” courtesy of Mike Lynch, Mike Dawson and of course Carolla Superfan Michael Prell.

Tom is now back on the ACS for his 2nd visit, he’s joined the ranks of Podcastone.

Adam is asking Tom if he’s met Norm Pattiz, Adam is calling him a can do dude and is totally complimentary.

 

Adam is asking Tom about his podcast and wants to know when Minneapolis became cool, BB has a cool guy dating analogy.

Tom is bringing up his appearance on the ACS, BB and Alison are protesting the idea that they “tore him apart” and Adam has a killer “the questions do arise” reply to Tom bringing up them questioning the looks discrepancy between him and his wife.

BB plays some Homer Simpson drops to wrap things up, Adam is trying to explain what he’s doing and Tom’s talking his way off the show, BB plays the academy award “speech is running too long” music.

 

Adam is asking Theo about his voice, Adam is comparing it to the southern gentleman NASCAR driver who sounds like him.

Adam is explaining how southern gentleman bumps up against gay southern guy.

Alison is asking Theo about his time on “Road Rules” and observing how different he seems, he’s telling them about growing up near an AIDS monkey research facility.

 

The NASCAR driver is Michael Waltrip, Adam says he sounds just like Zach Galifianakis character “Seth Galifianakis.”

Adam is bringing up the nutria unleashed upon the south, he’s riffing and wants to know what would happen if the nutria started breeding with the AIDS monkeys.

Adam is asking Theo about “Deal with It” season 2, Howie Mendel’s show, Adam is saying that when he filmed the show with Theo, they sat upstairs watching the mark.

Adam has a killer “fuck that AIDS monkey, bareback, c’mon fuck it… Could be Placebo Monkey!” joke about combining the show and his instructions to dare the contestant.

 

Theo is telling them about the “Jenner Girls” guesting on the show, Adam is asking for Gary to find Darrell Waltrip and Seth Galifinakis, is he mixing up Michael and Darrel.

They’re now playing an interview from “Late World” I think, it’s Zach doing his Seth character, now they’re playing one of the Waltrips.

Adam says we have “Country Strong” what about “Southern Gay”, can we have that now too?

 

Adam is explaining how someone thinking you’re gay might now win you many NASCAR fans, he’s telling Alison that he would butch it up if he wasn’t straight, he would be posing.

Adam is saying that everyone is horrible for observing his voice and thinking he’s gay, Alison is now mentoniing “the way he moves” that makes him look gay and Adam loves it.

Theo is telling them about spotting Angelina Jolie at lunch, he’s telling them about how she looked older and smaller in person, opened her own door and the best posture he’s ever seen.

 

Theo wants to know if he ever observed women who were much different in person than on camera, with all of the actresses he’s met over the years.

Adam is going off on the camera adding 10lbs and how unfair it is.

 

Alison’s News

Alison wants to know why the camera adds weight, Adam says it should do nothing or remove 10lbs, Adam is using Kirstie Alley as his counter example to some round face female T.V. presenters and how unfair it is for them.

Adam says when women start to dress like a gypsy they’re trying to cover something up.

Adam is now doing a live read for Draft Kings.

 

1st Story Is on Stephen Colbert replacing Letterman, Adam is sharing the details of his phone call with James Babydoll Dixon from earlier in the day.

Adam asked James what he can talk about on air, he says everything in the news is very accurate and pretty much how things went down.

Adam says that CBS called him, Theo wants to know who Adam wanted to take over.

 

Theo says he would like a black guy in late night, Adam says Arsenio is out there and now Adam is mocking them for being set in their ways.

Alison has a great “Don’t got Tom Barnard on us” one liner to get Theo to stop spiraling about the gay jokes made at his expense, not realizing that’s how they endear themselves to someone they like.

Adam is explaining how Stephen is now 80% himself on “Colbert Report” and won’t be too hard to transition to being himself 100% and ditching the character conceit.

 

Adam is using the hairstyles on “Happy Days” to make a point and Alison has a “Jappy voiced Rachel on Friends” follow up.

Theo is telling them about a poker tournament with Jerry Mathers, the Beaver himself and how he still rocks the same hairstyle, Theo says he thinks Ralph Malph aka Donny Most was with him.

 

2nd Story Is on a cover photo of Julia Louis Dreyfuss with the “Declaration of Independence” tattooed on her, Alison explains the mix-up regarding John Hancock.

Theo has an “off Color joke” to which BB and Alison both have great strong reactions, Adam is now commenting on the photo of Ralph/Don.

Theo is sharing his Fonzie/AIDS joke, Adam loses his shit, gold!

Adam is bringing up the hairstyles of the show and he says it’s the same thing Colbert will be doing with his hair.

 

Alison is telling them about the show “The Americans” and how they’ve made a choice with the series to not make it look exactly period correct.

Adam is bringing up the crew cut and how it was perceived of historically, he’s saying the cast of Happy Days just said fuck it and rocked their non-period accurate hairdos.

Theo is telling them about the drive by barber that would stop on the school bus and offer haircuts to the kids, Adam is ranting about fucked up everything is now and calling back the 2nd caller.

 

3rd Story Is on the Mazda recall due to a type of spider, Adam is commenting on the scary spiders that drop down behind the dash when you get into your car at night.

Adam jokes about playing Dokken really loud to annoy it or leave a door open for it to escape.

Adam is going off on the crane flies that lumber past the TV in a pitch black room, Adam says they should invent a “bug bulb” that attracts all of the bugs in the house.

Theo is telling them about a “glowing vagina for bugs” and Alison makes him repeat it, Theo says he doesn’t see fireflies anymore due to climate change.

Alison is wrapping the news, BB is playing the new drop of Alison’s beat off double entendre, I caught it too Alison!

 

Adam is doing a live read.

Adam is now giving out the plugs and wrapping up the show.

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