Giovanni’s Superfan Sidebar 02/03/2015 – Christopher Noxon
A real time blog where Superfan Giovanni does recap and commentary on the show as it happens and opines on all things ACS
Guest – Christopher Noxon
Recorded 02-02-2015 – Release Date 02-03-2015
Production Number #1503
Adam opens the show to a solid intro, the Carolla Super Bowl bet curse is broken and at the expense of Seattle, the city Adam is most popular in, the great magnet always adds an ironic twist.
Melanie Baldonado is making her debut as Newsgirl, BB plays the clip of DAG as Sonny yelling at Adam as today’s #TopDrop.
Adam is now peeling Melanie’s onion and getting her backstory.
Adam is now presenting a new bad harbinger for society, he’s adding this to the list of things like barbed wire on freeway signs and designated spots for people to abandon their infants at fire stations.
Adam is telling them about the picture day for his son, they were at a high school and Adam watched 17 year old guys play baseball, Adam says there is nothing more relaxing than watching strange teens play baseball unless you get aroused by it, he harps on that a few times.
Adam is sharing a brief conversation with an old timer stranger while they were watching the game, the old guy was worn out by Adam and delivered a “well alright then” and left to go stand 20 feet away.
Adam says the harbinger is that he bored an old timer, he asks if that’s a bad sign, this was on Saturday according to Adam.
Adam is declaring there’s never been a better time to be an alcoholic and comments on old timey flask usage among drunks, it carried a stigma.
Adam says that now everybody has a container, a stainless steel bottle of some kind, you can now hide booze in your water bottle and not be judged like in previous eras.
Melanie is telling them about her friend who has a flask labeled “Mommy’s little helper” and BB is telling them about bringing a thermos of booze to his late night Thursday class while in college.
Adam is bringing up Gary full tard, he says that he doesn’t watch the game and he discovered it 10 years ago after the Patriots vs. Giants game.
Adam is sharing the conversation with Gary full tard about what he was doing from 3-5 on Sunday, he was planting cactus while one of the best Super Bowl games of all time was going on.
BB is now ranting about people who skip the Super Bowl and bragging about not being into sports doesn’t make you cool, Adam says he must be talking about Chris Hardwick and BB says he’s not.
Adam is telling them about standing in between Matt Damon, Ben Affleck and Bill Simmons while the Patriots won the game.
Adam says they stood the entire game and were totally pumped.
Adam is now doing a Radioactive Media live read
Adam is now sharing a clip from Marky Ramone on Take a Knee vs. a clip showcasing the sound of his audiobook that was read by someone else.
Adam is telling BB about how many publishers don’t have authors read their own audiobooks.
Adam is lamenting who they chose as the narrator and Adam comments on how they often try to find someone who sounds like the author and can capture the tone.
BB is now using the movie ‘Life Itself’ and using the narration as a prime example of sounding like the author.
Dawson is now on mic and giving his take on the guys vocal quality, Adam says it’s the publisher giving all of their books to their “guy” and he looked it up to find out.
Melanie is saying this guy sounds reminiscent of a Disney reader, and gives an example.
Adam says he went to the dentist this morning and next year he’ll perhaps plan for a better appointment following the big game next year.
Adam says that all audiobook listening is historical and educational, Adam felt like he needed to explain the audiobook to his dental hygienists, as if she was judging him.
Adam says that Doug Baldwin did his touch down dance, Adam is explaining how they cut away during it, BB quotes Doug’s comments about doing it for one guy, not realizing it could mean it was done for Adam.
Adam asks what does that mean, still not grasping that he might be the guy it was being done for.
Adam is now asking about the level of fine he’ll receive for that celebration.
BB is disagreeing and thinks there will be no fine, Adam thinks it will be 6 figures and says you can’t have people fucking around at the Super Bowl.
Adam once again wants to find out who this person is, once again never considering it could be him and Adam suggests he might be attempting some misdirection.
Adam is now finally addressing that people have been suggesting it might be dedicated/directed at Adam, but Adam refuses to accept that reality.
Adam is now lamenting his own invention, he wanted nothing more than that dance and now he’s almost offended, be careful what you wish for.
Adam is now setting up a clip of Mel Brooks on Take a Knee, he explains the meaning of this clip.
They’re now playing the clip.
Q and Ace
1st Caller Joel, he’s asking about BB attending the same High School as Tom Brady, BB tells him about working on the paper together.
Adam is now explaining how Tom was goofy in high School and played the position of catcher, BB describes an almost “not hitter” that was ruined by Tom.
BB explains that Tom was drafted by the Expos and he’s a hell of a player.
Adam shares a story of running a “no hitter” for a guy who later went on to kill himself.
Adam is doing an Artic Ease live read
2nd Caller Adam, he is seeking further advice on cohabitating with his girlfriend, in addition to the two TiVos and square footage standard protocol as advised by Ace.
Adam says don’t expect change and brings up the rubber plug stoppers for carbonated beverages and his attempts to convince his wife to use them for her half finishes beers she puts back in the fridge.
Adam has a solid finances and parking tickets closer for another way relationships can suffer.
Adam is now asking Melanie about her relationship status and she gives some apartment advice, now they’re all talking about ‘Rocky’ movie posters and Adam says you should be allowed to hang them as opposed to other movie posters.
Adam plugs his new podcast PO’D with Dennis Miller on PodcastOne, the home of Classic Loveline.
Adam and BB briefly talking about the impending ‘Road Hard’ release and they take it back to the calls.
3rd Caller Emilio Rossal @EmilioRossal he has a solid intro and says hello to everyone.
Emilio is asking Adam about taking classes at ‘The Groundlings’ and succeeding without characters nor accents, as Adam has described working his way through a similar experience.
Adam is explaining that all of the people taking classes are theater geeks and is giving advice on playing a character.
Adam is now citing a season one man show episode where they did a Woman Show theme, Adam talks about playing a more sensitive character.
Melanie is sharing her character and accent challenges, Adam has her do an old black man voice.
Adam is bringing up the interesting angle that he was discovered because of a character despite not being what he or anyone else considered a character performer.
They are now playing the clip from The Man Show Season #1 Episode #16 ‘The Woman Show’ and peppering in some light commentary with BB.
Adam is explaining how pissed the viewers by that episode, he’s now describing the lengths they went to in order to flip the format and pull off the joke.
They go back to Emilio and wrap up.
4th Caller Michael, he wants to talk about the super bowl commercial and Melanie brings up the sad nationwide commercial.
Adam explains why saying “throws like a girl” is only a putdown to men, not a putdown to women.
Adam is saying we all must pretend to care or be outraged with the cause du jour so we can be defacto heroes, he uses the ALS Ice Bucket Challenge as his prime example.
Adam is now explaining how you teach children and how they go from a ball of narcissism to a human being, he’s making a point about other adults not evolving past these childhood milestones and are still so narcissistic they buy into these fashionable statements.
Adam is doing a live read for AllBallPro.com
Adam heads to break
They’re back from break with Christopher Noxon making his ACS debut, Adam is asking him about his book and he quickly encapsulates it into a perfect sound bite.
Adam is now asking Christopher about his life at home with Jenji Kohan and he casually mentions fencing and now Adam is riffing about fencing and adding hilarious additional moves and activities to the Olympic presentation of the sport.
Adam asks him about his kids and “nanny action” and wants to know if his wife ever gets on his case about working from home and taking care of the kids.
Christopher does confirm that she has commented on him whining about his workload with the kids and does mention their nanny, confirming Adam’s theory.
Adam is asking him what he wants for his wife’s career, he’s fully in her corner and psyched.
Adam tells Christopher that it’s more than a presumption that men feel threatened by their wives success, he of course doesn’t but does think those guys are out there.
Adam is asking him about the realities of being a working couple, Adam is basically fishing about the reverse situation he’s in and Christopher makes a great point about giving the person who you care about the most and is supposed to care about you the most the worst aspects of your personality, the least of you.
Adam is asking Christopher about his other irons in the fire, something was recently passed on and now Adam is saying that having a book optioned is a great thing but having the option run out and get re-optioned, there’s nothing fucking greater than that.
Christopher echoes his statement by commenting on mailbox money/residuals.
Adam is doing a Smart Mouth Live Read
The News – With Melanie Baldonado
1st Story is on Warren Sapp’s arrest, Adam is now asking if prostitution should still be illegal, Adam is saying it used to be in the mix with gay marriage and legal pot but nobody seems to bring it up anymore.
Melanie has an escort permit quote from the story and Adam is riffing on it, good stuff.
Adam jokes about the hookers going for the phone and says he keeps one eye on his wallet and the other eye on the second hooker as a rule of thumb.
Adam has a great if Vladimir Klitschko his Hayden Panettiere analogy for the damage that Warren could’ve done to these women if he wanted to harm them.
Melanie has the rest of the details of the arrest and quotes Charlie Sheen, Christopher corrects her that Charlie was quoting someone else, it wasn’t his original thought.
Adam says he would be disappointed if single Warren Sapp wasn’t out whoring, Adam says they should get Frank Caliendo in the studio to do his John Madden impression with a funny bit/premise for whoring rankings.
“Oh please I can smell your pussy from here” – Adam on haggling with prostitutes.
Melanie is in the mix and Adam is trying to figure out if this was an argument over the cost.
Adam says if he hit the women he’s not ok with it, but if he was just out whoring he’s cool with it.
2nd Story is on Bobbi Christina the daughter of Whitney Houston being resuscitated after drowning in a bathtub.
Melanie is giving her take and Christopher has a sympathetic comment and a funny follow up.
Adam jokes about meeting and marrying Bobby Brown and what that meant for the life of Whitney Houston, he jokes about her marrying Huell Howser instead of Bobby and how well off she would be today instead of dead and buried.
Adam is saying that bathtubs should have a nose sensor and drain if they sense a nose or face, BB has a CO2 variant on the sensor, Adam is now demanding two different Huell Howser segments.
Adam is telling Christopher about Huell and they’re playing the clip of him at the Baghdad Café.
Adam and BB are peppering some light commentary about the extended handshake, Adam shares his funny quote about the edit bay and Huell’s feet being the only thing that hits the cutting room floor.
Adam is doing a Shari’s Berries live read
They are now playing the Burt Lancaster segment from the same episode of Huell’s show.
Adam is riffing up a storm about this ridiculous bit of television, BB is arguing that Huell is more akin to Adam than he might think and perhaps he can appreciate Huell’s desire to not waste his time.
Adam is now setting up the coffee cans of rocks segment and BB says Huell’s exploiting an insane person.
3rd Story is on Johnny Manziel entering rehab, Adam is commenting on Johnny’s first game and how clear the results were, Adam cites Tim Tebow as a bad omen for Johnny Manziel.
They’re now playing the old guy and the rocks segment, Adam and BB are killing it.
Christopher is giving his take on the old guy and Adam has Melanie wrap the news with her old black guy voice.
Adam is now doing a live read for Reverie Bed
BB is using the classic “well” drop from the old guy gather rocks, Adam loves it.
Adam wraps the show and Christopher gives out a plug for an upcoming reading of his book.
BB has a killer out of context quote of Adam saying he’ll suck his own cock.