Giovanni’s Superfan Sidebar 01/08/2014 – Harland Williams and David Wild

Giovanni’s Superfan Sidebar 01/08/2014 – Harland Williams and David Wild

A real time blog where Superfan Giovanni does recap and commentary on the show as it happens and opines on all things ACS

Guest – Harland Williams and David Wild

Recorded 01-07-2014 – Release Date 01-08-2014

Production Number #1235

Show Page

Adam opens the show after Dawson has a rare stumble in the intro for BB; perhaps he was distracted by something.

Adam is welcoming David Wild to the show for his first appearance of the New Year, the record holding guest is coming up on his 60th appearance.

Adam and BB are commenting on the experience of watching their books rise and fall on the Amazon charts, David Wild has a Friends book anecdote and Adam is now saying we should all hope that one day someone says both “That was when ____ was ____” and “You know it’s just a popularity contest”.

 

Adam is telling the gang about Mark Geragos not disappointing in his personal life, he was smoking a cigar with some red wine hanging out with some powerful business types.

Adam is explaining the code for rich guys who have tells on how they became wealthy, Adam is explaining how he got a backstage look at the staging area for the Rose Parade and got to see the floats up close and personal.

Adam is explaining the passes that one can acquire that allow people to get through the security perimeter, residents of Pasadena. Adam is joking about the rich white guy Underground Railroad of “extra” car passes.

 

Adam is now explaining how the gilded cage of minimum wage came to ruin his day; he’s describing the super considerate wife who was trying to get him a road cup of wine.

Adam is explaining why he truly loved this woman, she had specific instructions and demanded he swap the solo cups for the paper coffee cups, to disguise the booze.

Adam is explaining how as the evening progressed with his wife and the kids and the instructions that lead him to this upcoming aforementioned brush with the gilded cage, the 9$ and hour cunt as Adam calls her.

 

Adam is explaining the demeanor and appearance of this woman, how she interfered with his attempt and Adam is explaining how he just routinely lies to people and used the “we live on this street” reply to get past her.

Alison wants to know what this lady was up to, refusing him access after he told her he was meant to walk that road.

Adam is explaining how they walked around her and got past the other flunkies, he’s commenting on the lack of uniformity among said moron security guards.

 

Adam has a great “Husk and Seeds” radio team joke and BB adds to it nicely, Alison has a good reaction.

Adam says it’s a metaphor for life, he’s got a solid bit of logic where the minimum wage person gets to make the tax payer suffer, David has a negative take on it and Adam hopes it’s not the case as it seems more uncomfortable.

Adam is explaining how you can tell when someone is involved with some high end operation; I think he’s hinting at his own AV Ed and his impressive resume.

 

Adam is explaining that he thinks at some point things become too big and too rich, he’s saying past 6500 square feet becomes a pain in the ass.

Adam is explaining how he ran into a guy working for Candy Spelling, doing all the millwork for her massive spread, Adam has a funny Alison joke; she’s got a great reaction.

David is sharing his impressions of Aaron Spelling and his constant P whipped status, David ponders what that means about the relationship.

 

Alison is helping Adam with one of these Life lock live reads, the sister version of the Draft Kings one with BB, David is in the mix with some Yiddish.

 

Adam is bringing up the Cinefamily screening of “The Hammer” This Friday and the coincidental almost Great Magnet timing of the death of one of its stars.

Adam and David are joking about the films cable airings and telling the gang that Tom Quinn passed away on January 5th; he played Coach Bell in the film and made it to 79 years.

Adam is explaining how Tom didn’t shy away from the sweat blood and germs of the ring; he’s explaining how Kevin new of him for casting and now Adam is explaining that nobody gets more human fluids on them than a boxing trainer and none of them die in their 40s.

 

Adam and David have a nice back and forth about prostitutes and Adam has a killer joke about stacking them like cords of wood in his trunk.

They’re now playing a scene to commemorate Tom’s career and work in the film.

Adam is explaining that hiring someone who does a profession often time can play that profession best in a film, much like Tom or Adam’s other classic example R. Lee Emery.

 

Adam is now asking someone attending the screening to ask him and Hench about the casting of Tom, Adam is explaining that Kevin has a steel trap brain for casting choices and things like this.

Alison is especially excited to visit Chicago for the first time, Adam is giving up the love for the Park West, and I’ve actually worked every single Park West show with him.

 

Adam is explaining his schedule and how he wakes up at 9:20 on some morning as opposed to 8 or 8:10, Adam is explaining how he got a last minute “Tonight Show” request.

Adam is sharing his reaction to the call and his decision making process, Adam is explaining how finding out that Mark Wahlberg as the other guest got him extra interested.

Adam eventually got the “we’re good” reply rejecting his offer to show up, Adam is now joking on how it will be interesting to see who does take the open guest spot.

 

Adam is explaining how he was frazzled by the word he was going to guest and even told the guy interviewing him from Chicago, Adam is joking about how the guy is now going to watch the show and think poorly of Adam.

Alison says she was told by a friend’s mom that diarrhea is always the best excuse; Adam says he would never stop blaming his period, Alison has a funny retort.

Adam has a funny “I got to lose 8lbs” joke about his prep for the Tonight Show, Alison has a question about the staff booking the event and Gary just answered Adam’s query about Kathryn Hahn the fill in, fill in guest on the Tonight Show.

 

Adam is sharing how he is delighted that his son was tasked with writing a report on someone famous and asked if he could write a report on his dad, BB has a Jimmy Kimmel joke and Alison has a great one liner mocking Adam’s simultaneous thoughts.

Adam is sharing how he wanted Sonny to write about Jimmy instead, he’s sharing his new thought on how he would like to see what Sonny would write, Adam is asking the gang and BB asks a clarifying question that gets an appropriately douchey response.

 

BB can’t muster up much of a childhood take on his dad, David Wild has some great examples, and Alison is now giving her take from that era, solid Quaker joke.

Adam has a great joke about Alison’s parents and Alison is sharing her take on the weirdness of parents being people outside of the family dynamic, Adam says he didn’t have that, he had Ray to point those things out.

David has a nice callback and Adam is launching into the 2nd live read of the show.

 

Adam is calling back his two new year’s resolutions, he’s getting to the trip to Carneys for a hotdog with the kids, he’s telling the gang about the “hotdog” train they go to and follow up with a trip to the park where Adam used to play peewee football.

Adam is telling them about his flashbacks to days of yore at Beeman Park, trying on his football uniform for the first time and witnessing a dude destroying the can on another Saturday.

“You don’t have to broadcast it” – Sad Trucker destroying said can

 

Adam is explaining how the times have changed; it went from no Pepsi machine, to a Pepsi machine and now one inside a steel cage and what that means about society and the place you live.

Adam is explaining his theory on CGI and Plastic Surgery and being stuck in the middle zone, he’s citing the voice activated services that don’t quite work yet; Adam says he doesn’t get any mileage out of this new technology.

Adam is now doing a live 411 demo to see if it works for him, Adam is going a couple rounds with 411 and getting the eventual operator, Adam doesn’t have Siri on his iPhone.

 

Q and Ace

1st Caller Peter “Fucking big time Talker” wants to know the chances of Adam going back to radio, Adam is explaining how he ended the conversations with SiriusXm who refuse to pay for podcasts, and they actually require podcasters to pay for their own broadcast insurance too per what was revealed on the JRE podcast.

Adam is joking about them being cheap dicks over there who act as if they have no money and only want to gauge interest, whatever that means.

 

Adam is joking about the freedom to say whatever he wants, he has a fuck off chambered in reply, how about that.

Alison is sharing her own experiences being offered free work as a freelance writer, Adam says if someone would like to make him an offer he’s all ears, but would probably say no.

Peter wants to know about Prisoner David, BB has a perfectly timed drop, Adam is explaining David’s 2006 role on the ACS.

 

Adam has a funny example of how the calls would be hurt by the inmate overlay to inform the caller who they are speaking with, Adam is now theorizing on why they started the recorded messages.

Adam is now bringing Alison in for an example of why they had to add the recorded messages to the calls, solid “VISA” improv bit.

It’s gone from funny to annoying, now it’s back to funny, Adam is changing the angle and asking about her nightly attire.

 

Adam and BB are commenting on David and moving on.

 

2nd Caller Mathias (You’re Alive!) Adam is referencing it, yes! Omega Man, the best riff ever.

Adam first shared that riff on 2003 Loveline in December with Christopher Titus; Adam is asking him on the origin of his name and pronunciation.

The last caller’s line is now beeping, Mathias is bringing up Classic Loveline, the show I host and old Loveline files, the ones I created, he wants to know when Drew started to turn the corner on Adam’s comedy and appreciate it.

 

Thanks for the non shout out Mathias, Adam is explaining how stupid producers and executives get in the way and ruin programming, Adam sums it up nicely and says that’s how you get iTunes Top podcast of the year(also Superfan Giovanni has you switch the category to comedy…).

BB is referencing the 1996-1998 era “Dr. Drew Joke Tote Board” on MTV Loveline, charting his few jokes over the years, Adam is now mistakenly crediting “Dime for Scale” to that list, that joke was from the Radio Show on March 6th 2000.

Adam is doing the last live read of the first half of the show and giving out David’s plugs, some nice LL Cool J comedy to wrap things up.

 

They’re retuning from Break with Harland making his first appearance of the New Year, Adam has a plug for Harland’s podcast and upcoming shows.

Adam is trying to recall the club he played in Atlanta, the one where he was confronted by Jim Breuer, The Tabernacle was the venue he was thinking of and Gary was able to pull it up quite quickly.

Adam is bringing it back to the Jim Breuer, Harland has a great reaction to this info and BB is filling Adam in on the “Half Baked” history between the men.

 

Harland is bringing up Adam’s boxing skills, Adam is underplaying it and finishing up the story and being fair to Jim.
Adam is really fleshing the story out, he’s giving most of the details, Alison is chiming in to expedite things but overlooking a key point about the Loveline visit being Adam’s example.

Harland now has Adam on a riff about burkas and the possible positive effects on one’s skin quality over time, preserved from the sun.

Harland is now riffing about squid eyes and a burka, his way of coping with living in the Middle East and he’s got a snow owl impression too.

 

Adam has an update on the holiday card they got 2 months ago from Prisoner David and his new fiancé; he’s getting released this month after a 20yr stint.

Gary is reading the details of the letter and nobody is making note of his actual heinous crimes that were overlooked on the 2006 ACS, this is funny but they should be cognizant of what he actually did.

FROM The INTERNET – “David had a public access show and had a girl that was around 14-16 over to his house to talk about her being on the show. She accused him of raping her, he claims it never happened; he was 23 at the time so even if she had consented it would have been rape. Then depending on if you want to believe his story or the official story he either tried with the help of his dad and either brother or friend to set up a hit on the girl, or the officer/hit man entrapped them and actually was the only one to ever mention killing the girl.”

 

Adam is now riffing on guys who couldn’t be cops or criminals, he’s got an excellent “Fred Armisen” riff to make a point about the types of people who become criminals and the cops and law enforcement who are practically criminals, Adam just said “Fred Armistad” and has a great slave ship comment to mock his own mix-up.

Adam is now taking it back to the owl and Harland is asking the gang about his recent trek to Petco, he’s doing bits about the pet options, rats, scorpions and snakes and the parental concern over choking hazards.

 

Adam is bringing it back to his kid’s toddler toys, the plastic celery and other food items that he would slap out of their hand and then try to get them to eat the actual version of at the dinner table that night.

“Nothing is worse than a spider with hair on it” – Harland Williams

Adam is joking about aquariums and terrariums, asking if we can’t all just do the no water math, use the same container for both, great Iguana riff between Adam and BB, nice one BB, I had an Iguana for 12 years, BB’s joke holds water!

 

“We’ve all heard the boxing axiom that guy’s got a jaw like terrarium glass” – Adam

Adam is doing the “Draft Kings” live read with BB.

 

Alison’s News
Her top story is on Michael Bay’s failed Samsung CES promotion, They’re now playing the video and Adam says he likes the curved TV he’s promoting.

Adam is commenting on the failing teleprompter that’s responsible for this failed attempt, Adam is contrasting this to Kevin Nealon defending the elephant.

Harland is saying it’s not really a meltdown, Adam is explaining that teleprompter speak looks good on the page but doesn’t work in conversation, he’s citing the stilted nature of stopping and starting.

 

BB has a wise comment on what the follow up tweet Alison just read means, Adam seems to agree and says that we’re all now talking about this TV in a way nobody would have had he not flubbed it, interesting angle.

Alison wants to know if that was nerves or a hissy fit, Harland says he’s worked with the man and he knows that he’s anal and has a temper, interesting insight.

Adam has a great cellphone analogy and is now commenting on how Michael clearly lost his balance and then never regained it, siding with the nerves argument.

 

Adam is now asking Harland about his sea legs and riffing about that with him, he’s actually asking him about his years on stage behind a mic and making a point about best man speeches that tailspin into a disaster.

Harland is continuing to argue that he expects perfection and Adam agrees but says Harland is wrong, because Michael jumped his own line.

Adam is ordering them to play it again and asking Harland about the Nike commercial he shot with Michael Bay, Harland is explaining it to the gang.

 

Adam is asking him when it was made and what happened to it, Harland says that it’s when NIKE was still peaking 10 years ago, really?

Harland explains their hubris and the lack of any mention of the brand, the swoosh was the only thing displayed at the end of the ad.

They’re now breaking down the game film of Bay on stage. Harland is explaining how nobody stood up to Michael on set; Harland had to say no to hitting his own head against a tree branch.

 

Adam is explaining that when one has the responsibility of military General or a director working on a giant budget film emulating war you have to be a little bit of a prick and that’s just how it is.

Adam is asking about electric eels, what happened to them as they’re not heard of much anymore.

Gary has found the commercial and they’re now playing it, it sounds much older than 10 years ago.

 

Harland is now explaining that commercial they just saw and tying it to his earlier comments, nice gay slang joke from Ace and reaction form Alison.

“This is why we went with a no-name” – Adam on Harland being hired then refusing to hit his head, Alison is angry at the commercial that makes no sense, Harland agrees and BB is explaining the details.

It starred Gary Payton from the Seattle Supersonics and was from 1999, 15 years ago.

 

2nd Story is on the death of Phil Everly of the Everly brothers dying.

Alison is telling the gang about Bill Jo Armstrong and Nora Jones recording a tribute album for the Everly brothers and she’s sharing the story of how they broke up on stage.

Adam is now waxing poetic on the decline of success, the county fair days for many musicians.

 

Adam is now sharing some wisdom from Mark McGrath regarding the changing venues of “Sugar Ray” and the “Since when did paying for everything count for nothing?” bit of insight.

“If you smell funnel cake, we’re there!” – Mark McGrath.

Alison has a nice allusion to Adam’s upcoming movie “Road Hard”.

 

Adam is now asking for them to play some of the Everly brother’s hits, instead BB is playing his co-written parody song mocking Mike Lynch, my least favorite Rich Banks tune.

Adam has an update on Lynch and his recent weight loss, nice work!

Adam is now doing his own quick renditions of some of their hits; Harland has a funny “O Sheila” reply.

 

Alison is saying that Knott’s Berry Farm means much less to her than it did when she was a kid, Adam is joking about Stalactite and Stalagmite and contrasting them to Aquarium and Terrarium, BB jumps in to correct Adam, Adam mocks him.

Alison wraps the news and Adam says the whole episode was worth it to see the commercial; Adam is further asking Harland about the commercial.

Adam is now taking it to Harland’s dad’s profession, Harland wants Adam to play his dad “The Solicitor General” and joking that it comes with a sash, Harland thinks slash and has a Russian hooker face cutting implied reply.

 

Adam is now having Harland do an Electric Eagle impression, Adam is doing a live read working the mountain bike commercial Harland did into the mix.

Adam is now wrapping the show and giving out the appropriate plugs and asking Harland about his new movie they didn’t get a chance to bring up in the body of the show, nice quick summary of the plot from Harland.

Adam has a closing Mangria plug as it’s now back in stock on Carolladrinks.com

BB plays Harland’s “Busted in the Pussy Wussy” drop from the Jim Breuer conversation portion of the show.