Dr. Bruce


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Show Summary

Adam opens the show talking about why Mother’s Day is always weird for his family. He recalls some stories from the past, and then talks about a very eventful t-ball game over the weekend. First, Adam was stung by a bee, and then he describes Sonny’s inability to play the game. He also talks about working at the studio over the weekend and all the frustrations dealing with getting his car rims finished. Later, Bald Bryan talks about a garage sale he had and all the nuts that showed up.

In the second half of the show, Adam tells a story about trying to buy a vintage diving board at a swap meet, and rants about his assistants not doing what he asked them to do. Dr. Bruce then jumps into this week’s Healthwatch with stories about sex toy parties and a new sexual enhancement pill. They also talk about pregnant women who smoke, and the non-existent dangers of second hand smoke. As the show wraps up, the guys talk about the death of Donald ‘Duck’ Dunn and proof that Adam does not have Asperger’s.


Follow Dr. Bruce on Twitter @DrBruceH.

Download Adam’s USC lecture for FREE at the Adam Carolla Store.

Show Credits

Producer: Mike Lynch
Producer: Mike Dawson
Audio/Voice Over/Post-Production: Mike Dawson
Newsgirl: Alison Rosen
Sound Effects: Bryan Bishop
Associate Producer: Gary Smith
Technical Director: Chris Laxamana
Show Summary: Matt Fondiler

Image Gallery

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  1. Katie


    Great show on Friday. Bringing up Kelly Thomas will hopefully strike a chord with all the listeners, thank you for bringing it up it needs to be discussed.

    Till tomorrow! -KT


    • Poochie's Uncle
      Poochie's Uncle05-16-2012

      How much is that doggy in the aquarium…

  2. Brian in New Orleans
    Brian in New Orleans05-13-2012

    Do we have to wait a week to find out who screwed up the Magic taping?

    • Rob

      You really think it was screwed up? I think there is another angle. It was shot with 2 cameras. They are showing this to build suspense. Right in the beginning of next episode, I bet you anything they get the download from the second camera.

      • El Gordo Loco
        El Gordo Loco05-15-2012

        Agreed. You can tell Magic is talking to another camera, and not thin air. Trump needed to try to make Adam look bad

        • brian

          Either there’s a second camera, or they really should just use Magic’s voice as a voice-over instead.

  3. Connard

    Ear raped by Bald Bryan and Sonny. How novel.

  4. JT

    **GREAT show.** You know why? Because Alison wasn’t there to interrupt Adam. BB ALWAYS brings it! Love hearing him talk, too!

    • back sack& Ass crack
      back sack& Ass crack05-14-2012

      Agree JT. Didn’t have to listen to ”mmmm hmmm” after every sentance from Adam.

    • Hugh Gashol
      Hugh Gashol05-14-2012

      Yea I missed Alison too.

  5. ted

    HOLY SHIT DR BRUCE!!! You have a HUGE head – when compared to Adams!

  6. Chucker

    The reason second hand smoke is so dangerous is because the second hand smoke particles are “charged” particles. A single charged smoke particle acts like a vacuum and sucks up all the other bad airborne particles and then one breathes in this “agglomerated” particle which is much more dangerous.
    Very easy to show this scientifically.

    The we carpet smell is formaldehyde used in the manufacturing, a carcinogen.

    • david

      go back to washing your hands repeatedly

  7. Gafzini

    Where’s the link to the waste of my time ringtone?

    • Jim

      I can’t find it either. Help!

  8. Bobby

    Adam’s been treating Dr. Bruce a little better lately. I feel better for the doc. Adam, just because you often encounter rude ignoramuses in the L.A. area does not translate to ” we live in the “shittiest time and shittiest land ever”. The reality is that we live in the freest, most materially blessed land in human history. Yes, there are rude idiots out there, but generally I find across the country that most people in competitive business know that they must have customer friendly people & service. If they don’t then the free market weeds them out usually sooner than later.

    • cg

      You think there’s a free market economy in L.A.? Really??

      You’re the center of the government-intervention universe. You’re the opposite of free market. Listen to Carolla or anyone in the construction industry describe what it takes to create a physical structure to improve their property, and by extension, that wasteland community …

      You’re in the least free-market economy in the country, and your numbers show it.

      Keep watching businesses and residents run away to Texas … maybe you’ll eventually get it.

  9. Ryan II
    Ryan II05-14-2012

    Magic couldn’t be that influenced by half tard Gary, how could you think that you should turn away from the camera?

    • Lisa

      Agreed…….I’m waiting for them to say they used two cameras and different views and sent it all to be edited in NY. Since they are not video guys…..they sent it for the pros to do.

  10. Tim

    At the risk of sounding like an asshole, why the fuck do you bother to bring Dr. Spaz on if you never let him talk?

  11. Sy

    If Adam wanted the diving board real bad, then he should have called right alway to figure out if his assistant dialed the right number. His assistant probably read the numbers wrong due to Adam’s poor penmanship.

  12. Joel M
    Joel M05-14-2012

    Blues Brothers. Best movie EVER.

    “We had a band powerful enough to turn goat piss into gasoline.” – Donald “Duck” Dunn – RIP

    • Poochie's Uncle
      Poochie's Uncle05-15-2012

      We play both kinds of music here, country and western.

  13. Ledgewood

    Weird great magnet moment. I just popped in the Blues Brothers DVD Saturday night. Sad.

  14. Elle

    It is pretty irritating when you go to use the micro & there’s shit spilled in it. I mean the person who spilled it knows they spilled it, what is so damn hard about cleaning it?! That plate is removable and can very easily be rinsed off.
    And who doesn’t like non-stale wheat thins?!
    C’mon people!!!!!!!!

  15. lubos

    i miss larry miller….

  16. uygbh

    How the hell do I find that sonny ringtone on itunes?

  17. Bobby

    Tried to download Adam’s USC address but Yahoo put me through hell. Took forever to download then yahoo said I didn’t have permission to access file.

  18. Chris Gallagher
    Chris Gallagher05-14-2012


    A Georgetown doctor is currently studying how a compound found in red wine and red grapes (called Resveratrol) could change the course of Alzheimer’s.

    Read more about this ongoing research: http://bit.ly/J4IDYS

    Will wine win in the fight against Alzheimer’s?


  19. JessMan

    WHAT IS??

  20. Rachel

    Here you go Adam http://www.bmj.com/content/325/7371/1011.1.full horrible defect from mothers who smoke. My husband had this problem – your stomach seals itself off from the lower intestine. As you eat, it just sits there and attempts to digest, then gets vomited back up. If the child doesn’t get surgery, they die. He had invasive surgery at 3 months old and has a disfiguring scar on his abdomen from it.

    I’m usually with you on a lot of things, but the idea that you of all people are willing to say an addiction is unimportant and inconsequential is just irresponsible and sad.

    • cg

      Ah yes, the British Medical Journal. Impeccable source with no ulterior motives whatsoever. Well done.

    • Zapoli

      Adam is the Jenny McCarthy of smoking while pregnant, i.e., a dangerous idiot. It’s unclear how it’s supposed to be entertaining. At least McCarthy thinks (incorrectly) that she’s doing some good.

      • Dustin

        There is a giant difference between saying something is healthy and safe, and saying something is overblown and not nearly as dangerous as it’s made out to be. That, as perfectly illustrated by your comment, IS THE PROBLEM.

        As has been said before the problem is as human’s we are terrible at risk assessment, we do the most dangerous things in life (drive a car or motorcycle) with no thought about it, and then worry constantly about second hand smoke and the effects of plastic bags. It’s insane.

  21. Boring, Oregon
    Boring, Oregon05-14-2012

    Eh where did Dr. Bruce credential?

    Im thinking offshore or online medical degree. No physician i’ve ever met would say “Catch AIDS” or get mixed up about the difference between 1.2% and 102% when describing how likely a smoker is to get sick.

    I like how Adam takes the Hammer of Mockery to him though. He is definitely not most favored nation status

    • cg

      He went to Loma Linda … ranked around 30 out of over 130 medical schools in this country, and has been published on numerous occasions.

      What’s wrong with saying “catch AIDS”? Does “contract” make it more palatable for you? Unlike cancer, which isn’t transmitted, AIDS is transmittable (“catch-able”), and entirely preventable … yet, it gets a fraction of the attention that behavior-based (except for blood transfusion transmission) diseases like AIDS receives.

      Wonder why that is …

    • cg

      Oh … and how does Dr. Bruce not have favored nation status? Say what you want about Carolla, but he clearly loves his family, and he has no problem with sending them off with Dr. Bruce on a vacation. I’m a family man, and I can tell you there’s nothing that says “favored nation” than that level of trust.

      In short, I explain, think or shut up.

    • dave

      while i agree with you, @Boring, that Dr. Bruce is spazzy and not among the better guests on the show (are we really dying for a medical segment once a week? most of adam’s medical rants are rehashed anyways), he said “1.2 times as likely means that a person is 120% more likely, etc.” This is false. 1.2 times is 20% more, not 120% more. How a doctor wouldn’t know that boggles my mind. And if you don’t know at least do your homework so you don’t sound like an idiot on a popular podcast

    • mnoswad1

      Thought he said “1.2 times”……..then had to clarify the 120% percent because Adam wasn’t letting Bruce make his point as usual. Wasn’t confused, but tiring to finish a point and manage Adam’s comments throws Bruce off his game. He’s used to talking to people that listen better than Adam does.

    • steve

      How many physicians have you met that also talk on comedy podcast/radio shows?

  22. Steve Hatchett
    Steve Hatchett05-14-2012

    “Ahh, from the Blues Brothers..” Ever the musicologist.

  23. FU

    My girlfriend leaves the chips open all the time.

    Can’t tell you how many times I’ve had to throw out the Wheat Thins because they are stale.

    How fucking hard is it?

  24. blah

    Please stop playing that Sonny clip!!!!

  25. Jorm_valadez

    Who messed up Magic Johnson’s video? Why did they film Magic’s left cheek, it just doesn’t make sense. Wouldn’t Magic be like ‘wait, this doesn’t make any sense.’

  26. Philm_Skuhl

    AHAA HAA HAA! That video of Magic Johnson was priceless. I have been laughing my ass off since Magic did his about face and turned away from the camera last night. If that is all the footage they have of Magic, then Adam has to be the goat when Clay Aiken wins. Completely inexcusable. When Paul Teutul had to rely on his fabrication crew back home, they kicked ass. When Adam’s Band O’ Tards tried to do something, they completely dooshed it.

  27. Jane Moore
    Jane Moore05-14-2012

    LOL @ Adam getting his second-hand smoke rant crapped on by Bruce and then backpedaling so fast it’s embarrassing. Every sentence after that he started qualifying with “well, uh, …”

    “Well, uh, we’re not talking about someone walking past a smoker outside on a windy day when it’s 79 degrees out and the planets are aligned in just the right configuration…”

  28. Elle

    AND…. what happened to the days when you weren’t allowed to go to school until you had all your shots? I went to elementary school in Chicago, and that’s how it was, w/o immunization records you were denied until you had your shots.

    • Poochie's Uncle
      Poochie's Uncle05-15-2012

      That’s how it still is in Chicago. My kids need to have their immunization cards completed.

  29. Bartenational

    Adam, every show you complain about your parents and how horrible they are FROM YOUR SPORTS CAR FILLED WAREHOUSE. What ever they did to you, it f__king worked …

    nuf said


  30. RoyalDryness

    Dr. Bruce, if someone is 1.2x more likely to get sick that means they are 20% more likely to get sick, not 120% more likely. If you are 100% more likely that means you are 2x as likely. If you are 1x as like you are AS likely no more no less. So 1.2x as like means you are 1x as like plus 20%.

    • listen carefully and learn
      listen carefully and learn05-21-2012

      Thank you all so much for commenting on this. I had to replay that section of the podcast 3 times to understand what the hell Bruce was trying to say. I wondered if it was just me, or if others are also tired of the mis-information carelessly spewed out into society. These bogus statistics that are hard to understand and often misinterpreted (smoke and mirrors ;-}) are designed to just get people up in arms over nothing.

      another favorite: Verizon comercial showing how they are SO much better than AT&T because their 4G motorcycle is faster than AT&T (or anyone’s) 3G motorcycle. of course 4G is faster than 3G. What’s your point????

  31. Blake

    Dr. Bruce is a wierd looking dude. I would feel a little worried if I saw him in the ER. Maybe he only sees gangbangers?

  32. AFan

    Would love an Allison, Bryan and Larry Miller podcast!

  33. William E Browne jr
    William E Browne jr05-14-2012

    I miss Alison, What’s going on with Larry Miller?

  34. Geomath

    Missed Alison today. Her wit and asides are often overlooked but add a lot to the show. But with or without her, best podcast anywhere!

  35. Josh Range
    Josh Range05-14-2012

    the sonny ringtone is on itunes.

  36. Eggie Weggies
    Eggie Weggies05-14-2012

    When I saw how much they were focusing on Adam’s crew in LA on the Apprentice, and I knew how Adam employs a bunch of stoners, I knew someone would fuck up. But seriously, how does an entire crew have Magic looking to the left and noone asks: “Is this really what Adam wanted?”

    We’ll see but maybe they’ll still use the audio, I thought the script for Magic was gold before that. Adam really came into his own on that episode and showed everyone how much funnier the show could have been if he had been kept longer.

  37. Chris

    Just because Aceman was talking about the blues brothers, I had to go buy the blu ray and watch it. I forgot peewee herman was in that movie, there’s a lot of well known actors in this movie. Damn awesome movie

  38. Michael Teague
    Michael Teague05-14-2012

    It isn’t that ALL people with Aspergers don’t have a sense of humor, but, if they do display humor, it is of a distinct or unusual nature. I have Aspergers, and I make comics. If you are on the autistic spectrum, you do not necessarily display ALL the secondary characteristics. Some aspies, for example, display extraordinary gifts in areas where other autistics display weaknesses, such as in math or writing. (Adam may not be clumsy—but he can ride a unicycle!) Averted eye contact, hypervigilance, lack of empathy, obsessed with self, twitching leg (stimming), repeating himself over and over, poor ability to transition out of his rants, encyclopedic memory on recondite subjects… The list goes on and on. Adam is a walking poster boy for Aspergers.

    • stnuntrnd

      makes sense, with the exception that his subjects are the opposite of recondite

      • Michael Teague
        Michael Teague05-16-2012

        Adam’s detailed knowledge of Italian sports cars counts as recondite, for starters. Other aspergers traits Adam displays: high threshold to pain, wears the same clothes everyday, limited intonation of voice, predisposition to atheism, loyalty to friends, fidelity to spouse, etc.

        Since Aspergers is hereditary, this explains his emotionally uninvolved family history: One or both of his parents are on the spectrum. Chances are one or both of his children will display Aspergers traits by school age.

  39. Used Buttplug sniffer
    Used Buttplug sniffer05-14-2012

    do you ever notice that Ace rips on Sonny all the time for saying he’s awesome at baseball when he sucks, and then in the same breath he blames everyone else but himself for his failed sitcoms and movie that no one watched (except us) and continues to declare that he’s awesome and everything else sucks

    • MC White
      MC White05-15-2012

      Yes, this is typical behavior of people who point it out in others, when they too, share the criticized behavior.

  40. Kain

    Fking awesome rants today ace also u rocked your recent celb appert episode

  41. ssalinas

    Re: Underweight Newborns. Your rant about underweight newborns and smoking is factually incorrect. Having been involved in healthcare research and obstetrics for some time now I can tell you that there is an empirical connection between mothers smoking while pregnant and underweight newborns. No one is concerned about 7 or 8 pound newborns as you suggest. The concern is for those weighing less than about 4 pounds. The vast majority of drastically underweight newborns are not fully developed and have long term respiratory related issues due to underdeveloped lungs at birth. These are facts (unlike much of the secondhand smoke statistics) with which you simply cannot rationally argue. I would think that you would be concerned about the financial cost to you. As a large contributor to our tax system you are funding a great deal of these newborns lifetime healthcare costs.

  42. zero1media

    The shows where Adam talks about tracking down a desired item, trips to the flea market or any garage sale stories for that matter, always rocks. And more Cyber Alison, btw!!!

  43. Katherine

    Sorry i am a loser too, I cannot find the ringtone!

  44. Terri Lynn
    Terri Lynn05-14-2012

    We love you Ace Man!

  45. Hakeem the Wonder Boy
    Hakeem the Wonder Boy05-14-2012

    Hack recently lost the love of his life. He has a chance to win her back, but in order to do so he will have to become…… a rapist

  46. Hakeem the Wonder Boy
    Hakeem the Wonder Boy05-14-2012

    Hack has a manusript to a children’s book that Adam will actually like. But in order to get it published, Hack will first have to become…….. a rapist

  47. Walt

    Bruce give a weird vibe.. he looks creepy and he fuck over Ace on that business venture. I don’t trust this guy like the cop who brings his lunch from home in a brown paper bag.

  48. Here'sthething

    I have been an ardent fan of Adam for many years. I first became aware of his humor and insight when I would hear my daughter listen to him. However, I am continually annoyed by the syncophants who agree with all he says and never contradict or question. Guess they know what side their bread is buttered on. Dr. Bruce is an interesting informed doctor with valuable medical info to convey, and it is a shame that he can barely get a word in edgewise before the ego of Adam interrupts. Some of us would like to occasionally be interested in hearing the words of a guest convey a whole thought before Adam starts in with. “Here’s the thing”……….. But I nonetheless enjoy the show while I am taking my daily walk. I preordered the book and am happy to contribute to Adam’s coffer because he provides me with hours of free entertainment.

  49. cristo

    so you drop your rims off to be powder coated and they tell you they’ll be done in a week. a week later they start telling you “call me call me” and then you find yourself in the place 9 days later. why not just say, “give me my rims back. i’ll have someone else do it”? if everyone walked away from bad businesses, the madness ends.

  50. Daniel


    Doctor in NYC who is not a spaz and thought I had to comment while listening to the podcast:

    FETUSES DO BREATHE. They have something called fetal hemaglobin which, similar to our own myoglobin in our muscles, can bind oxygen tighter better than the hemaglobin circulating in the bloodstream. Basically, the fetus strips the oxygen out of the mother’s bloodstream. Anything that reduces the oxygen in the bloodstream also reduces it for the fetus.


  51. Josef

    Unable to buy an old school diving board, First World Problems. (Rich Guy Problems)

  52. Eggie Weggies
    Eggie Weggies05-16-2012

    Bald Bryan is quietly the most consistently funny person on the show now. How’d that happen? Props.

  53. Wilson

    Love listening to the Aceman condescend to Dr. Bruce, a brilliant, educated man who saves lives on a daily basis. And I say this free of irony…. HILARIOUS!

  54. Dave

    This is the first time I’ve seen a photo of Dr Bruce, after years of listening to him (as early as his first appearance on loveline) – totally NOT how I pictured him. xD

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